


Smashed Up and Broken

by saucyminx



Series: Tattoo Verse [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-08-25
Updated: 2010-08-25
Packaged: 2017-10-28 05:33:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 50,853
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/304302
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/saucyminx/pseuds/saucyminx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sandy wants a tattoo and Jared takes her to the best in town –Jensen Ackles. He’s a true artist and although they hit it off quickly – there are things that Jared keeps secret in his life and Jensen might just be one of them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Of all the things Sandy could have had for her twenty first birthday, she had to pick _this_. At least the shop didn't look too intimidating. When Jared had followed his GPS system to the edge of town, he'd kind of been expecting worn out buildings and a lot of shady looking people. This wasn't really the case; it could have been any other section of town, with only not recently repaved streets. It only went so far to soothe Jared's nerves.

"Are you sure about this San? We could still go to the mall. I promise a shopping spree of epic proportions." Jared slammed the door of his SUV and walked around the front, offering his hand for the short girl to slide out. "I'll even get you that new Dolce bikini you've been asking for."

Sandy laughed, flipping hair over her shoulder and shaking her head. "Come on Jay, don't tell me you're actually nervous about _me_ getting a tattoo." Rolling her eyes Sandy slid out of the car without taking Jared's hand and slid her purse over her shoulder. "Besides, we had to make this appointment _months_ ago. I'm not backing out now."

Jared glanced across the parking lot as they headed for the door of _Razor Ink_. "I read online that you can get HIV from tattoo needles you know."

"Maybe if you get them in an alley behind a drug house." Sandy snorted, punching Jared's arm. "Stop being an ass. We researched a million places, this was the best. And we're booked with the best, the guy who runs the place so seriously. Chill out."

"But still-"

"Jared. Really. It's a wonder you ever moved out of your parent’s house. Or, you know, crossed the street." Sandy rolled her eyes once more before pulling the door of the shop open, letting out a burst of cool air.

The inside was... cleaner than Jared expected. A waiting room, pictures on the walls of the types of tattoo designs already available for getting if you didn't have your own design, a hall with doors that Jared could only assume were the rooms for the artists to use. Jared slid a hand up through his hair and looked around for someone to help them out.

"Jared?" Sandy was by the front desk, dropping a pen onto the book there. "I don't think anyone is going to jump you. Seriously, relax a little." Sandy laughed and walked over to the wall, looking at the designs there. "I really don't understand what the issue is. You're not getting the tattoo, this place is clean, and the artists are good. Maybe if you'd get the stick out of your ass-"

"Whoa. No reason to bring my ass into this conversation." Jared tentatively smiled at Sandy and lifted his shoulders in a shrug. Eyes scanning across the counter, Jared decided he was going to ruin Sandy's birthday if he kept this up so he tried his best to be helpful and reached out, tapping the bell to let whoever was stashed in the back rooms know they were there.

Jensen strode around the corner and scratched at the stubble on his face. He _really_ should have shaved that morning but he'd been far too lazy. As it was he'd only just made it to the shop on time. "Sandy?" He glanced between the two clients and his eyes settled on the short brunette. "Are you mine?"

"If you want me to be." Sandy blinked over at him eyes wide.

Jared huffed and rolled his eyes. Sure, the guy was alright to look at. If you liked that, tattooed bad boy thing. Jared stared at his arms, it took a minute for him to realize those were _tattoos_. The right arm was all colourful, some landscape that seemed maybe Japanese or something. It was probably cool but Jared was too far away to really appreciate it without openly gawking. The left arm was blue, water, splashes and waves in a pattern that seemed random and yet flowing. His ears were pierced, hair short, spiky and carelessly misplaced, and there was the faintest dusting of facial hair over his jaw.

"That giant over there is Jared. Are you Jensen?" Sandy stepped forward, smiling at Jensen as her fingers curled over her purse strap.

"Yes Darlin', I am." Jensen held out his hand and took Sandy's in his. His fingers covered hers easily, she was tiny and Jensen smiled at her. Turning to her friend he found he had to look up a little, which was pretty damn rare because Jensen was just over six feet tall. "You really are a giant."

Jensen _liked_ the giant. He had a mess of brown almost shoulder length hair that was half hanging in his eyes, cat-like eyes - even the same damn colour as a cat's. The whole look was kind of completed by a perfectly shaped jaw and pretty sexy mouth - _and_ \- Jensen was staring. "Jensen." He held out his hand to the giant and smiled warmly. "Wish you were mine too," he murmured.

"W-what?" Jared blurted, confident that he'd completely misheard what Jensen had just said. Maybe. Definitely. Or Jared's brain really just couldn't process that. "I uh. Hi. Hello."

He flushed, bit his lip and reached out, shaking the man's hand. Skin, slick and smooth against his palm and Jared's heart flipped in his chest. He pulled his hand back quickly and looked away, arms sliding over his chest as he tried to make himself smaller. It wasn't often that he did that any more but something about that sparkling green gaze; it hit Jared in a place he couldn't name.

"Should have known. Well, it's okay. Taken anyway." Sandy snapped her fingers and bounced forward, grinning at Jensen. "So, I'm assuming you got the design I talked to uh, Christian about?" She threw a grin up at Jared, sliding up to his side to elbow his hip. Jared winced and rubbed it softly.

"I sure did. I've drawn something up for you and you've got great legs. Just have a seat for a minute and I'll go and get my design." Taking a couple of steps backwards Jensen smiled slightly at the flush that was still on Jared's cheeks. "There are drinks in the glass case over there. Help yourself." Turning he headed back down the hallway to his room slamming his hand on Christian's door as he passed.

"Sleeping, fuck off," ground out a rough voice.

"Clients. Get up - you gotta watch the front." Laughing Jensen headed back into his space to the sound of Christian swearing on the other side of the wall.

Jared was still staring at the hallway that Jensen had disappeared down, he winced when a hand slapped over his arm. "With all the abuse you give me it's a wonder I'm..."

"If you can't even say it Jared, your issues are deeper than I thought." Sandy sighed and glanced down the hallway before looking up. "So. He's hot huh? Like, super hot."

"I'm going to tell Katie you think so." Jared replied flatly and looked back at Sandy. Even if Jensen _was_ super hot - Jared hadn't given much thought to tattoos before but really, damn - it didn't matter. He didn't even have to know the man to know they came from two completely different universes. "Why isn't she here anyway?"

"Work and no. You don't get to change the topic. Did you hear what he said? About wishing you were his too. Come on, he shamelessly hit on you." Sandy's smile took on a wicked glint and she bounced forward on her toes. "You should talk to him while we're doing the tattoo."

"Doesn't the thing make noise or something? I'm not sure I want to see it anyway. There's... blood and stuff." Jared cringed at the thought alone and wandered over to the case Jensen had indicated, bending over to find some water. "Want anything?"

"M'good." Sandy shrugged and hooked her fingers into her jean pockets, looking around then back at Jared. "You know... if you want to talk to him it's not that big of a deal Jared."

"Sandy, please. It's your birthday, let's not do this." Jared frowned and twisted the cap of his bottle of water. He smiled a moment later to make Sandy smile back because it was her birthday, and that should mean no personal drama of any sort allowed.

Jared could think Jensen was the hot tattoo artist, that was just fine, but in a few hours he'd never see him again so there was no point in letting the girl get her hopes up. And well, Jared would just enjoy the view while he could.

-=-=-=-

Sliding his laptop toward him Jensen clicked through the designs he had scanned earlier. He had three versions for Sandy to look at but now that he'd seen her he knew which one he was going to suggest. Striding back out with the laptop under one arm he banged on Christian's door again and it sparked off a new wave of cursing. He was still laughing when he rounded the corner and flipped the screen up on his lap top again.

Jensen headed for the front counter and put the computer down. "Come over here lovely lady." He glanced over at Jared and smiled warmly. "You too, I _like_ you." He winked to let Jared know he was just teasing and turned the screen so Sandy could see his designs.

Swallowing, Jared slid forward, closer to the screen and Jensen and that damn _wink_. What the hell was he supposed to do with that? And the way he said _like_. And, _see_ , Jared had told Sandy this wasn't a good idea. He was going to go home and be scared for life, only finding men with sleeve tattoos, pierced ears, striking green eyes, and bright smiled attractive from now on. _Awesome_.

"You drew these all yourself?" Sandy asked, leaning against the counter and grinning.

"That's us, all custom. And now that I've seen what great skin you have and the tone of it - I'd say the middle one." Jensen clicked on it to resize the image. "It's more of a Japanese style; fine lines and thin, reedy and wispy, kind of like you. Blues and pinks with your skin tone. Does that seem okay to you?"

"Oh my god, that is perfect. Katie is going to freak out." Sandy grinned at Jensen, touching his arm and squeezing softly. "My girlfriend. She loves blue, I love pink. And we both love butterflies. So, perfect. What do you think Jay?"

"It's... incredible." Jared leaned closer between them, peering at the design. It didn't look like someone could have drawn it, it looked real and Jared was more than impressed.

"You're-" When he turned his head Jensen was kind of, _right there_ , and he blinked a few times before straightening up. "Really talented." He finished in a mumble, biting his lip and stuffing his hands into his pockets.

"Thanks Jared." Jensen smiled again at the man and turned his full attention to Sandy.

"So. Your ankle yeah? Which one?" Jensen crouched down beside Sandy's leg and held out his hand as she put her leg forward. "Beautiful," he said as his fingers smoothed over her skin.

Standing again, Jensen picked up the lap top. "Okay just give me five and I'll get the tattoo on a transfer and we'll get started."

Heading back down the hall again Jensen reached out to pound on Christian's door and a strong hand grabbed his wrist. "Once more Ackles and you'll need a new career 'cause your hand'll be broken."

Laughing, Jensen twisted out of the man's grip and headed into his room to find the original drawing. It only took him a few moments to find the sketch and he set about putting it on transfer paper. Once the image was on the carbon he snagged his spray bottle and headed back down the hall.

"You two wanna follow me down here to the back room?" Jensen turned without waiting to see if they followed him and headed straight to the large back prep room and put everything down on the side counter.

When he turned Sandy and Jared were already in the room. "Alright Sandy, out of your shoes and hop up here on this stool and I'll put the transfer on." Jensen crouched down and patted the footstool in front of him.

"Oh god, I'm totally nervous. We should have done this when Katie was off work." Sandy slid out of her shoes and held out her hand, taking Jared's as he instantly stepped forward to help her up onto the foot stool. "You'll hold my hand the whole time right?"

"Always do." Jared grinned at her, squeezing her hand reassuringly. He was kind of nervous for her, but then, he was also a bit scared of needles so, that was an easy answer. "It'll be better if you can surprise her with it after you take the bandages off."

"This is true. She's going to freak." Sandy beamed over at Jared before turning her eyes to Jensen. "Have you been doing this long? You don't look old. I mean, you know." She giggled and Jared couldn't help laughing. Sandy could get away with any comment about anyone just by giggling.

"Old? I'm twenty-six." Jensen shook his head and laughed. He moved around until he was in the right spot then sprayed the soap on Sandy's ankle. Pressing the transfer against her skin he pressed a damp paper towel against it and looked up at her. "You two friends?" He liked to get people talking before he got them on the table so they didn't get too tense. Some people loved getting tattooed but usually first timers were pretty damn nervous.

"Nah, I just met him on the street and thought, hey you're cute, come join me in my tattoo getting experience." Sandy laughed, looking up at Jared. "Also, I need to invest in this footstool business; I don't feel like such a midget now."

Jared snorted - then blushed because he fucking _snorted_ \- and shook his head. "I think not. You'd make me carry it around all the time." Shrugging, Jared watched Jensen's fingers moving over the paper and back, expertly doing whatever it was he had to do for the tattoo thing. A weird urge to tell Jensen more about himself crept up out of nowhere, resulting in him blurting out, "I'm twenty-two." He blinked and scrunched up his face slightly when Sandy laughed.

"Yeah?" Jensen smiled softly at the man then reached to pull the transfer off Sandy's leg slowly. Tilting his head slightly he had a good look at the design. "Jared, come down here tell me what you think. Sandy stand up straight."

Going down _there_ meant getting closer to Jensen, Jared was both okay and not okay with that but he moved anyway. Releasing Sandy's hand once he was certain she was standing straight, Jared stepped round her and crouched down beside the man, peering at the image of the butterfly there.

"Looks great." Jared grinned over at him, losing himself in those green eyes once more. They were like, emerald or something, Jared wasn't the best with colors, but he was sure he'd never seen one quite like that before. "Still can't believe you drew that." He mumbled and smiled softly at Jensen.

Jensen found himself staring for a few moments. Jared's hair looked soft and smooth and Jensen had to make a concerted effort not to touch it. He couldn't help it- touch was what he did. Despite what most people thought it was one of the main reasons he became a tattoo artist. It wasn't just flat art it was living art, touch. "Alright then."

Pushing up from the ground Jensen held his hand out for Jared to help him up.

Sliding his fingers along Jensen's palm, Jared let the man pull him to his feet and stood there for a moment before realizing he was kind of still holding the guy's hand. He dropped it and moved out of the way, looking up at Sandy but looking away just as fast when she just grinned.

"It's my twenty first birthday today." Sandy said to Jensen grinning at him. "Jared is buying me this tattoo as a present."

"That's a pretty great gift." Jensen held out his hand to Sandy and helped her down. He gestured behind him to a full length mirror on the far wall. "Over there, have a look and tell me what you think of the placement." He watched as Sandy moved quickly the mirror. Folding his arms across his chest Jensen leaned back a little and turned to glance up at Jared. It was kind of _hot_ having to look _up_ at someone. "When we doing your tattoo?"

"Oh uh." Jared flushed and looked away. "I'm scared of needles." He admitted quietly then flushed even _brighter_ and tried not to groan. "Plus you know, picking the right one and all and I just, I don't know. Yours are cool. Must have taken forever. I don't even do so well when I have to get shots. Like a couple of years ago I broke my arm and they said IV and I might have passed out from that alone but I'm pretty sure it was the pain and-"

"Jared." Sandy interrupted the flow of words tumbling seemingly never ending from Jared's mouth. "Breathe darling. Or you'll pass out again and won't be able to blame it on the pain."

"Pain of embarrassment?" Jared suggested and glanced over at Jensen, giving him a sheepish smile and shrugging. Sometimes, he did think it was a wonder he'd ever learned to cross the street.

Laughing again, Jensen patted Jared on the arm. "Don't sweat it." His arm was firm and warm and Jensen moved his hand quickly.

Heading over to Sandy, Jensen smiled. "And the verdict? Are we good to go?"

"It's perfect. Does it hurt much?" Sandy rolled her bottom lip between her teeth, glancing at the mirror once more.

Jensen shrugged a shoulder. "It varies from person to person. Some people say it's like a cat scratch, some like pain, other says it's pleasant. Turns me on." Jensen flashed a crooked smile at her.

"That's creepy Ackles," a voice called out from the front desk.

"Christian does my tattoos for me." Jensen rubbed his arm slowly and turned to glance at Jared. He'd _really_ like to get his hands in that hair. Blinking he shook his head slightly and headed toward the door. "Alright so - let's go to my room and get started. I have everything set up. Jared there's an extra seat in there so you can do your hand holding duty."

Heading down the hallway Jensen slipped into his room and kicked his stool out of the way. It rolled to a stop near his machine and he waited until Sandy was in the room. "Okay, so let's get you up on the table on lying on your... right side and cross your left leg forward. Jared," he gestured to the chair behind the massage table, you sit over there."

For some unknown - completely rational - reason, Jared was still stuck on Jensen talking about being turned on. It was, turning him on, thinking about Jensen being turned on and all around weirdness was happening in his head. It was a good thing Jared had realized he was into guys awhile ago because Jensen could give him some sort of gay complex otherwise.

Taking the seat beside Sandy as she situated herself on the table, Jared reached out and threaded his fingers through Sandy's, grinning at her. "Just think, you can use this as an excuse for sex for a week, at least."

"Pfft. I never need an excuse for sex. My girl gives it up willingly." Sandy grinned and stretched her leg out. "I'm gonna get _so_ trashed tonight. I can't wait."

"I'll remind you of that later tomorrow when you start complaining about your hangover." Jared laughed and glanced over at Jensen as he prepped whatever. He liked the way the man's jaw curved up, the perfect nose, hell he kind of really liked the earring he could see and that had never done anything for him before.

"So you own this place?" Jared asked, to get Jensen talking again mainly.

Jensen hit the power on his machine and it buzzed slightly. "I do, worked at a lot of shops for a lotta years and then set up my own. There are two other artists including that filthy mouthed Texan on the front desk. I'm the most talented."

Jensen nudged Jared's food under the massage table and nodded in the general direction of the front desk about two seconds before Christian yelled out. "Most talented my ass."

They laughed and Jensen turned to get some gloves. "Allergic to latex?"

"Nope. I am, however, allergic to peanuts. So, watch out for that." Sandy grinned over at Jensen before sighing heavily. "Jared, can you sit still this long?"

"I really don't think it's me we've got to worry about here." Jared laughed, eyes turning briefly to Sandy then settling back on Jensen. "So what are you doing?" He gestured to the equipment with his free hand, pretending this was all for curiosity’s sake. It was good to know what Sandy was having done anyway, just to be safe.

Jensen snapped the gloves on and picked up a folded square of paper towel and the gun in the other hand. "Was just getting all my inks ready, making sure everything was new or sterilized, just my double check and..." he spun on the stool. "I'm good to go, ready?"

"Yes sir." Sandy nodded and Jared watched as she squeezed her eyes shut for the initial needle. After a moment she relaxed again and grinned. "Can we talk to you while you do that? Or is it a main focus thing so I don't end up with a retarded seal on my ankle like Jackie's." Sandy laughed as Jared did, squeezing his hand in hers.

Laughing Jensen buzzed the gun again. "Just don't _jump_ or you'll get a weird ass butterfly. Seriously, I'm good we can talk - just let me know if you need to move or you don't feel good okay?" Smiling warmly Jensen dipped the needle in the ink and leaned down to stretch the skin before the machine buzzed and he touched the needle to Sandy's ankle. He drew a short black line and pulled the needle back to give her a chance to freak out if she needed to. "Okay?"

"Yeah. It's not too bad. No worse than my belly button." Sandy smiled and relaxed back into the table. "It's pierced," she added a moment later.

"I didn't watch that happen." Jared muttered, leaning over slightly to look at the place Jensen was working. He couldn't really see the needle, just looked like a tool he'd never seen before so that wasn't too bad. "Looks good so far Sandy, but there's not much."

Sandy giggled and shook her head. "Thanks for trying. So, Jensen, you're gay right?" Leave it to Sandy to lay it out there like that, Jared flinched and looked away.

Chuckling softly Jensen wiped up the excess ink and continued to outline his design. "Yes 'M. I'm gay and, before you ask and Jared chokes on his tongue, I'm single too." Glancing up at the man Jensen's lips twitched into a reserved smile.

Jared was pretty sure he was going to die from the lack of blood pumping through his system and staining his face instead. "She would have asked too," he muttered to cover up for the grin on his face. At least he knew for sure the man was definitely flirting with him. He was pretty sure that was a good thing. If he could manage to flirt back without sounding retarded.

"Jared's single too." Sandy informed when Jared failed to offer the information. "And he thinks you're hot. You can tell by the way he keeps blushing and smiling at his feet."

"I'm buying you the worst drink imaginable tonight." Jared informed flatly, shaking his head. The amount of torture he was going to bestow upon Sandy after this was immeasurable.

"What? I'm sure Jensen wanted to know. Right Jensen?"

"Admittedly, I was a little curious." Leaning down over the tattoo Jensen shifted Sandy's foot and dipped the needle back in the small container of black ink. "Not sure he's interested though." Blinking slowly he buzzed the machine for a few moments and looked up to meet Jared's gaze.

"I am." Jared blurted out and smiled then looked away. "I'm just, um..."

"Occasionally flirting inept?" Sandy offered and smiled softly at him, shaking her head slightly. "See Jared, you just kind of flirt with everyone second nature but when you like someone you're not so good at flirting with them."

"I really wish this wasn't the conversation we were having now." Jared whispered meekly and shrugged. Sliding his foot forward, Jared let it rest against Jensen's and smiled at him. "I am though. Just, for the record."

Jensen looked up long enough to smile before concentrating on the tattoo again. When he moved slightly to reposition himself he made sure to lean his leg against Jared's. "So, Sandy, when you're not tormenting Jared what do you do with your time?"

"School. I'm a senior at the University. And I work at the cafe near there, making coffee and stuff." Sandy grinned, and then laughed. "Oh yeah, then there's Katie."

"Can't forget Katie." Jared grinned; pleased to have the topic off him and that Jensen's leg was resting against his own, warm heat seeping through his jeans. Catching Jensen's eyes, he beamed. "Ah Katie, the most wonderful, beautiful, talented blonde you'll ever meet. She smells like the rain and laughs like birds chirping and everything she does is oh so very wonderful."

"Shut up Padalecki, you're just jealous you don't have your own Katie." Sandy laughed louder and stopped before rolling over as she was about to. "Anyway, Katie is my girlfriend and we've been together for almost a year. And she is all those things Jared said so very sarcastically."

"Well, she's very lucky to have you Sandy." Jensen wiped at her skin and had a look at the outline. "Probably gonna take about an hour to outline then if you want to keep going another ... oh half an hour for the shading. Is that okay?" The steady buzz of the machine was such a constant in Jensen's life he hardly noticed it.

"Sounds good. Not too bad." Sandy glanced down, trying to get a better view then giving up. "Jared and I can tell you all the details of our crazy life or something and you can tell us about yours. It sounds like a plan to me."

Jared settled back in his chair and let Sandy's familiar voice wash over him. She was really good at keeping up a conversation, even turning things off herself and onto other people. She got Jensen to talk a little about his shop and how long he'd been doing this - which turned out to be seven years - and how he'd gotten so good at the art thing. It was a natural talent or something; Jared wasn't the kind of person to understand natural talents because he was pretty sure he didn't have any.

They covered the school topics - Sandy was planning on being a teacher which amused Jared always - and Jared was finishing up his last year in business management, still not sure what to do with it but a degree was a degree.

Mostly though, Jared just watched Jensen. He was focused on his work but every now and then he'd look up and smile when he met Jared's eye and it made something flutter in his chest. Even if this was the only time he saw the guy, it was worth it, just to know someone this hot really did exist.

When Jensen declared he was finished Jared was a little surprised, he hadn't even realized how fast the time had gone. Letting go of Sandy's hand, Jared stood and walked over to Jensen's side, purposefully leaning against him slightly to peer down at the beautiful butterfly. "Wow. It's even more beautiful than the drawing." He murmured, smiling over at Jensen.

"Sandy, hop down and have a look in that mirror back there, let me know what you think." Jensen started cleaning up, throwing away the ink pots and pulling the plastic off the machine and cable. Pulling his gloves off he tossed them and put on a clean pair so he could cover the tattoo once Sandy had a look at it. Glancing up he half hoped that Jared would stay in the room while Sandy went off to look.

"So excited." Sandy slid down and slipped her foot into the sandal before heading back out of the room.

Jared watched her go and shuffled from foot to foot in his place, hands tucked into his pockets. "So you, work a lot? I mean, since you run the place and all. Must be crazy busy hours." He stared down at Jensen, watching him wet his lips. They were deliciously plump; Jared could just imagine how great they would feel against his own.

"I keep whatever hours I want. The only perk of being the owner." Jensen spun on the stool until he was facing Jared and looked up at the man, gloved hands resting on his thighs. "You're busy tonight, I guess. Drinking with Sandy."

"It's, well, Katie will be there. So you know, they call me their gay third wheel." Jared's lips twitched in a slight smile and he shrugged. "You, wanna come? You could. Sandy loves you and I would like to see you. If you wanted. But you probably have a million better things to do than hang out with some kids on your night off." Jared looked away, curling his fingers in his fists, deep into his pockets.

"Well, I'm not much for clubbing if that's what you guys are- listen. I like you, you're hot and you're funny - a little shy but I can deal with that because it's adorable. No, Jared I don't want to go out with you and your lesbians but I would _love_ to see you. When you want to - call me. You know where to find me." Jensen smiled warmly.

"Oh. Okay." Jared nodded and tried not to look too disappointed. He didn't blame Jensen about not wanting to go with them tonight, it would be way overwhelming and even Jared wasn't looking forward to it as much as he should have been. "I uh, yeah. I guess I should just ca-"

"It looks so amazing!" Sandy slid into the room, grinning at them. The smile dimmed slightly when she looked between them but she - mercifully - didn't ask. "Do you have to cover it up now?"

"Yeah. Sorry, especially if you're goin' out drinking. Don't want you wreckin' all my hard work." He patted the table then picked up the bandage and waited until Sandy stretched her leg out to slick some moisturizer over the design. Pressing the tape down Jensen patted Sandy's leg. "All done."

Spinning on the stool Jensen pulled the gloves off and picked up one of the sheets of paper with the aftercare instructions on it. "So, _don't_ scratch it or pick at it or it will scar." He picked up a container of moisturizer and handed it to Sandy, "Keep it moist. Uncover it in the morning and don't cover it up again. Don't get it wet in the shower for a few days. No swimming till it's healed. You good?"

"Yeah, sounds perfectly good and I shall follow all the instructions carefully." Sandy hopped down, clutching the moisturizer and the paper. "I have to show it off but I promise I won't uncover it until the morning and all that other stuff."

"There's a vote of confidence for you." Jared muttered and shook his head. "How much do I owe ya?" He tugged his wallet out of his pocket, pulling out his credit card. His mom was going to freak out when she saw the name of the company billing but she adored Sandy so she'd get over it pretty easily.

Jensen stood and took the card, fingers lingering over Jared's. "I usually charge four hundred for something like that. How about three and you promise to phone me?" He stared hard at Jared's face, meeting the man's eyes without looking away for an instant.

"How about I pay four hundred and promise to call anyway?" Jared smiled softly, lifting his shoulders in a slight shrug. He'd call. Probably. Hopefully. If he didn't completely chicken out the moment after they left the shop.

Nodding Jensen headed out to the front counter with the card. Sliding it through the card reader he picked up a pen and tapped it on the counter.

"Jensen? What's going on?" Christian leaned forward and propped his chin on his hand.

"Nothin'."

"Did the pretty boy turn ya down?" Christian bumped his shoulder against Jensen's.

"Christian? Not now." Jensen smiled sweetly and tore the receipt off the machine and headed back down the hallway. He put the paper on the counter behind Jared and held out the pen. "Signature please, it's an old machine."

While Jared signed Jensen turned to Sandy. "Jared's not gonna call me is he?"

"He will call you. I'll make sure of it." Sandy grinned, sliding her arm through Jared's as he stood. "But that won't have to happen because you're going to call aren't you Jared?"

Jared slid a hand through his hair and smiled softly at Jensen. "I will. I promise." To prove he was serious he pulled out the card for the tattoo parlour that he still had from when he and Sandy were setting up the appointments. "Got you number right here." He knew Sandy would ride his ass if he didn't call anyway, but he wanted too, so it shouldn't have been much of an issue.

"I'll make it worth your while." Jensen smiled again and held his hand out for the pen and the receipt. "Okay, all done. Sandy, it was an absolute pleasure. Jared." Jensen back out of the room and held out his hand to show them out.

"Thanks so much Jensen. I hope to see more of you soon." Sandy grinned, heading for the door.

Jared hesitated for a moment, and then on a random whim he couldn't explain, leaned forward and pressed a soft kiss to Jensen's cheek. "Bye." He said with a wide grin, stepping back and bumping into the wall before turning swiftly and following Sandy outside, laughing when she shoved at him.

Shaking his head slightly Jensen turned back to start cleaning his equipment.

-=-=-=-

There were things about being a Padalecki that weren't as glamorous as most of the people in Jared's life seemed to think. For one, just because his father owned more than a fourth of the city in real estate, it didn't mean Jared had a guaranteed job with his business - or that he even _wanted_ to work real estate whatever with the man. And, alright, it did mean that Jared was the only twenty two year old he knew that owned a three story house in one of the nicest gated communities in town but that had been a birthday present when he turned twenty one and Jared had moved Sandy and Katie in with him just so he didn't feel so lonely in the large estate. He was also pretty sure his dad had given it to him because he still lived at home but, well, that was another thing entirely.

Also, no matter who his mother might be - in his case this happened to be one of the best chef's around, with four restaurants to her name and a show on Food Network - did not necessarily mean Jared had any natural skills in the kitchen. Or the living room. Or any other place that he might happen to be.

Sandy often teased him about how wonderful graceful his mom was and how wonderfully _not_ Jared was. After all, Jared broke his arm in a park doing pretty much nothing, not everyone could claim that kind of supreme klutziness. Jeff, his older brother, said Jared would be a millionaire if he could get paid for the times he'd hurt himself accidentally.

Mostly though, he thought people had a lot of misconceptions about the Padaleckis. Whether this was because they owned the large lake property - and thus had control of the lake and its hours of operation - or because they reeked of a perfection most people were jealous of, Jared wasn't completely certain. Just knew that he didn't always offer his last name - it wasn't like he could pretend to be any _other_ Padalecki, even if he'd wanted too. Really though, he didn't. Jared was proud of his family.

Jared was also, maybe, a little bit sheltered. Or so some of his friend's said. It wasn't as if Jared was trying to be naive about things, sometimes he genuinely had no _clue_. Like, how to use a washer and dryer - they'd always had a maid who did that stuff and when Jared had thought it would be cool to not have a maid in his own home, it didn't take him long to learn that he had no idea about taking care of a house.

Then there was the gay thing. Jared had stumbled upon that his freshman year of college. During High School he'd fooled around with some girls and wrote off his lack of interest to enjoying time with his friend's instead.

Then Sandy had dragged him to a party - Jared's party experience was limited to fancy soirées hosted by his mother or father for whatever the reason - and Jared had learned that college students liked to drink. A lot. And sometimes when they drank a lot they made out with the kid from their math class before exchanging sloppy blow jobs in a dark room that turned out to be the laundry room. Yeah. After that Jared swore to never go to a party again and had somewhere close to a mini-meltdown.

Thankfully there had been Sandy, who was his guiding light through the world of homosexuality - ironically enough - and Jared had come to some terms with it. In the terms of being quite comfy in his closet where neither of his parents could flip shit about the fact he preferred guys to girls.

If they assumed Sandy and he were dating, well, that was their own fault. Kind of. Or maybe Jared encouraged that because every time he spoke to his mom before she was suggesting daughters of her friend's that were single. Sandy had been a solution to that problem.

Not now though. No, now Jared just had to worry about doing something that would make his achievements equal in comparison to his brother's. It was kind of expected of a Padalecki, which was another thing people might not know.

"Jared? I'm going to have to cancel our lunch date this weekend darling. I'm taking the jet out to London for your brother's premiere." Sharon Padalecki's voice filled the line and even though it was disappointing news, Jared smiled.

"That's okay. I have a lot of school work." Jared shrugged, deciding it was mostly okay except he'd bailed the weekend before because of Sandy's birthday and Jared got a little sad if he didn't see his mom once a week or so, even if it was just for lunch. "Is this the movie with the bus chase? Or the movie with the robots? Or the one where the robots chase the bus?"

"Jared," Sharon warned but laughed and they knew it was true. Jeff Padalecki was a director - people were calling him the next J.J. Abrams - and that was cool and all but Jared only thought of his brother when he watched the movies that were often ridiculous so they failed to be very entertaining. "I'll tell him you said congrats on another film."

"Mmhmm. I remember when we were little and I used to star in his films. He could make me a famous actor. I could be the next Brad Pitt." Jared grinned then laughed loudly as Sandy walked by and scoffed, _not likely_.

"Was that Sandy dear? Tell her I say hi." The adoration in his mother's voice was clear and Jared flinched. The woman loved Sandy like a daughter already. Which would be all fine and dandy if Sandy had the slightest possibility of becoming the new Padalecki. She didn't, and Jared felt beyond guilty letting his mom believe otherwise. "Are you alright honey? You've been quiet."

"Sorry, distracted." In truth Jared _was_ distracted. Mainly because he'd been flipping the business card in his fingers, just about ready to make the call when his mom had called instead. Jared was trying not to lose his courage because it had been three days already and he didn't want Jensen to forget about him. "Call me when you get back from London?"

"Of course, I'll make it up to you. Take care, love you, and be safe."

Jared could hear shuffling in the background as his mom's voice trailed off and he laughed quietly shaking his head. "Love you too mom. Bye." Thumbing the phone off Jared glanced toward the door to see Sandy still standing there. "She's going to London for Jeff's premiere."

"Good. You'll have missed two Saturday lunch dates in a row. That's healthy for separating the umbilical cord and you know, growing a pair." Sandy's arms slid over her chest, eyebrows lifted.

Jared flinched, dragging a hand up through his hair. Sandy always got a little testy after a call with his mom, because every time he was on the phone with any member of the Padalecki family, she was encouraging him to start confessing the truth in some way. It hadn't been such a big issue when Sandy was single, but the more time Katie was around, the harder it became for Sandy to go along with it. "Come on, don't be like that."

"Call Jensen. Maybe you'll meet someone who _will_ make you strong enough to tell your parents that you like to take it up the ass." Sandy smirked then yelped when a pillow hit her in the head.

"Don't be so crass." Katie's voice came from down the hall and Jared laughed, relieved to be in the safety of his room. The blond slid up to the doorway, wrapping her arms around Sandy's middle and dragging her back. "Call the boy Jared. I'll keep her occupied as you do."

"Thanks for your troubles." Jared smirked, shaking his head and turning his attention back to the card. He had the number memorize from the amount of times he'd read it already. It didn't necessarily make it any easier to dial and Jared's hands shook as he pressed in the numbers on the touch screen then lifted his phone to his ear, holding his breath.

-=-=-=-

Shoving his sketch back a little up his drafting table Jensen stared it while he reached out blindly for his phone. Brushing his thumb over the screen he held it up to his ear without even glance at the screen. "This better be good." He didn't get much time for drawing, sketching, hell - anything that didn't have to do with the shop so being interrupted wasn't high on his list of things to do.

"Um." Jared instantly flushed and pushed up off his bed, pacing around his room in small steps. "Jensen? This is Jared. Sandy's friend? You know giant, slightly shy but funny guy?" His heart flipped in his chest and Jared tripped over his computer chair, cursing quietly.

"Oh. Uh, you okay there? You call me up to swear at me?" Jensen pushed his sketchbook back and smiled as he stretched his legs out under the table.

"No, no. I just, maybe broke my pinkie toe but it's okay. I'm okay. Do you remember me or am I making a complete idiot of myself?" Jared slowly sat on his bed, sliding across the middle and dropping down, reaching the conclusion that moving while he was on the phone with Jensen was too dangerous to continue.

"Of course I remember you. Taller than me, nice ass, cat's eyes, long hair - need me to go on or you believe me?" The smile on Jensen's face grew and he pushed up out of his chair and headed over to the king-size bed by the floor to ceiling windows. Flopping down on his back Jensen kicked his boots off and groaned softly.

Jared blinked up at the ceiling, the noise falling from Jensen's lips echoing slightly around him. "I believe you. But I think your memory might be giving me a bit too much credit. Except the taller than you thing. Long day?" He closed his eyes and pictured Jensen in his mind; he'd maybe drawn up the image a bit because Jensen was looking somewhere close to the hottest man in the entire world.

"Awesome fuckin' day. Spent most of it drawing so far. Wanna come over or are we going out somewhere?" Jensen closed his eyes and smirked. This one was gonna be fun.

"W-what?" Jared sat up, underestimating how close he was to the edge of the bed. His quick actions had him sliding off the side and crashing hard down onto his ass. "Shit. Sorry. Sorry I uh, fell off my bed? You want me to... um. Like now?" Jared's face had to be tomato colored he was sure of it and he'd never been more glad that no one was around to see him.

"Or. We can just talk. Whatever." Jensen rolled onto his side and stared across his warehouse. "You're kind of a nervous guy aren't ya?" Cute, insanely cute, but nervous.

"I'm just, klutzy. Or something. I don't know, I'm kind of stupid. But um. I could come over? I mean, if you wanted me too. That sounds, I'd be okay with it. If... yeah." Jared closed his eyes and let his head drop back to the edge of the mattress. Going over there probably wasn't the best idea, Jared would likely trip over then air and break his nose.

"Sounds damn good to me. And for the record, I don't think you're stupid." Jensen closed his eyes and stretched out. "You know the old Carlson Warehouse across from the harbour master?" Jensen loved his place. It was the biggest purchase he'd ever made; an empty warehouse and then the conversion of the top floor into living space. He loved it. "Park in front and I'll meet you down there."

"Um. Okay. You're not gonna like, attack me with needles or something when I get there are you?" Jared put a laugh behind the words but instinct had him nervous. He knew the area of town Jensen was talking about, not that he'd ever been there. "Right now? Or well, in a few minutes?" Jared's heart was racing as he pushed up to his feet, excited nerves dancing through him.

"There will be no attacking. With needles." Jensen laughed. "How long will it take you to drive here? I'll wait downstairs with my phone in case you get lost."

"I won't. My dad owns- well. I know this town well. But, I'll call if I do. Um, I'm across town so twenty minutes or so? Maybe thirty. I need to, brush my teeth." Jared headed for his walk in closet, sweeping his gaze around for something to wear. "Should I bring anything?"

Laughing quietly Jensen tried to picture Jared. "Well, I have the standard things here. Food, water, alcohol, indoor plumbing. See you in thirty." Jensen ended the call and dropped his phone. Still chuckling softly he pushed back up and stared around. At least he didn't have to clean up. That was one of the distinct advantages of having simplistic tastes. The rest of his day might _just_ just end up being more interesting than he'd expected.

Jared stared at his phone for a minute before turning and pacing to the hallway. "Girls!" He called down the hall and was actually a little surprised when they clambered down the stairs in less than a few seconds. "Clothes."

Katie and Sandy exchanged a look before sharing identical grins and taking off for Jared's closet. There were definitely times having them around was more than just making up for the lack of company.


	2. Chapter 2

When Jared pulled up to the harbor, eyes scanning over the large warehouse in front of him, his heart slammed into overtime. Especially when his gaze dropped to Jensen, sitting on the front step.

When he'd agreed to go to Jensen's, he hadn't thought much about the harbor thing, but seeing the warehouse there made him realize that Jensen _lived_ there. He parked in what could have passed as a spot near the front and climbed out, resisting dragging a hand through his hair because Sandy told him not to mess it up, that she'd finally got it to look just right.

"Hey, am I-" Jared cut off as Jensen stood and his eyes drifted over the man. A white wife beater stretched across his chest, making the tattoos on his arms stand out even more than before. His jeans were faded and torn and looked so natural that Jared was a little jealous that the man could pull off the look.

"Am I, can I, park here?" He gestured toward his SUV and stepped closer, jaw dropping then snapping shut as his gaze lingered on the shape of barbells over the man's nipples. _Holy fuck_ what had Jared gotten himself into?

Jensen nodded and couldn’t help smiling at the hazel eyes that peered out from the mop of light brown hair. He actually looked good, although a little more like he was going to meet someone's mother rather than hanging at Jensen's for a while. Standing up Jensen stretched again. He spent so much of his work week curled over limbs that it was also such a pleasure when he had a day off and could actually stretch and move.

Moving down the steps Jensen grinned up at Jared and noticed a stain on his shirt. Rubbing the backs of his fingers against the shirt he lifted an eyebrow. "You have an accident on the way over?" The pale blue shirt fitted well and Jensen's eyes _might_ just have spent a few moments too long following the curves of Jared's chest.

"Coffee." Jared scrunched his nose then smiled at Jensen. "Don't tell Sandy, she's always lecturing me about drinking in the car. Or sometimes drinking period." Lifting his shoulders in a shrug, Jared reached out and let his fingers slide over the waves on Jensen's arm, smiling at how smooth the skin felt. Eyes lifting up from the tattoo to those emerald eyes - that really were better than he remembered - Jared blushed and smiled shyly. "Just wondering if I could feel them."

"MMmm." Jensen studied Jared's face and watched as the blood seeped up into the man's skin. "Those waves look real. Kane's - uh Christian. He's good with movement, wisps of smoke, stuff like that. I wanted it to look like they were moving when the muscle in my arm moved." Jensen flexed his muscles slightly under Jared's touch.

Laughing in surprise, Jared watched the tattoo seemingly shift against the flex of Jensen's arm. "That's awesome." His thumb slid up the waves, along Jensen's shoulder for a moment and just under the strap of material on the wife beater before his hand dropped. "So you really live here?" Jared glanced up at the warehouse then out to the ocean. "Amazing view."

 _That_ was the kind of touch Jensen could get used to. Jared didn't seem clumsy at all when his fingers were sliding over Jensen's skin so softly.

Taking a few steps back up the stairs Jensen held out his hand and waited until Jared grasped it. "Better view from upstairs, come on." Tugging the man into the building Jensen kicked the door shut and dropped Jared's hand so he could haul the freight elevator doors open. "Get in."

"Man, this is kind of surreal." Jared laughed as he stepped into the freight elevator, eyes wide. "I mean, I didn't even realize places like this really existed outside somewhere like New York City. You own this whole place?" It didn't seem impossible in Jared's eyes; after all he technically owned his house too so it wasn't completely unheard of.

"Yeah, it's not much. I mean, if I had more money I would have renovated more of it- but I've got enough space to live in comfortably. Kinda put all my money into it - well, what didn't go into the shop." Jensen shrugged then yanked the inside gate closed and turned the elevator key until it lurched into motion. Leaning back against the gate he stared at Jared. "I'm surprised you called."

"I promised I would." Jared said quietly and watched Jensen's Adam’s apple move as he swallowed. Eyes still fixed to the skin, Jared half shrugged. "I would have sooner. I just, had to work up the confidence. I'm maybe not so good at asking people out." It hadn't really mattered in the end, Jensen had pretty much asked him out, but it would have been easier if he'd given Jensen his number.

"Gotta take a chance on things sometimes, yeah?" Jensen smiled and scratched his chest through his shirt. Despite his good intentions to make Jared more comfortably he found himself staring again. Too long. Dropping his gaze as soon as he felt the elevator jolt, Jensen hauled the door open again and gestured for Jared to walk out. "There's a cat. Well, my cat. Anyway, he’s in here somewhere so don't be surprised if you see him lurking. His name is _Zillah_."

"I like animals." Jared said quietly as he headed out into the warehouse. It was wide open, concrete floors with the spread of furniture occasional placed. Jared could see possibly one of the biggest beds he'd ever seen in the far corner, large floor to ceiling window behind the frame. Along another wall there was a desk of sorts, with a lamp and a notebook sitting on top, likely where the man worked on his art.

"Wow." Jared looked over at the opposite wall where the kitchen area was set up, not too far from a small glass room - which Jared realized with widening eyes was a shower so _big_ \- and a doorway to the toilet.

Finally looking back at Jensen, Jared forced his jaw closed; realizing staring with an open mouth wasn't the best way to make a good impression. "This is the most amazing thing I've ever seen and trust me, that's saying a lot." Jared smiled shyly at him, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "You're probably used to people being like this when you bring them here huh?" If Jared lived here, he'd probably never leave. It was amazing.

"Don't bring people here." Jensen headed over to the drafting table and pulled his sketch forward. "C'mere. Tell me what you think." When Jared made it to his side Jensen slid the sketch closer so he could see it.

"Wow." Jared breathed and reached out, sliding his fingers along the edge of the sketch. It was him and Sandy, both smiling, their hands threaded together. "That looks just like us. You did that from memory?" Jared turned to him with wide eyes, letting his palm come to rest over Jensen's shoulder.

"Yeah," Jensen smiled and pressed his fingers on to the smooth surface of the table. "I have this thing with remembering faces. Like a tick I guess. If people make an impression on me it's like they're stuck in there and sometimes I have to get it out in a sketch. You and Sandy - you've got a special friendship, yeah?" Turning his head to the side he watched Jared's eyes move over the sketch.

"We've known each other a long time." Jared nodded, smiling softly at the picture and back up. It was too complicated to explain all the dynamics of him and Sandy, but maybe one day. "Do you think I could have a copy of this sometime?" He grinned at Jensen and let his finger slip beneath the white fabric once more, hooking under the strap. Jensen had such soft skin, it was almost unnatural.

"Oh you can have it." Jensen's voice was a little deeper. It was getting a little hard _not_ to focus on Jared's fingers moving over his skin like he'd never felt flesh before. "I think it's like stealing a piece of someone's soul when you draw them and don't give it to them. You ... like to touch."

"Oh." Jared let his hand dropped to the side and stepped back. "Sorry. Katie says I have a people touching disease." He shrugged and looked around the warehouse before looking back at Jensen. "She also says I spend almost all my time with people talking about other people and it's rude and I shouldn't do it. So. Sorry about that too." He smiled uncertainly, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "I really don't touch that many people." He added in a slightly meek whisper.

"I didn't mean it was bad." Jensen simply stared at Jared for a while and found himself wondering when the man was truly relaxed and peaceful. "What's your favorite movie?" He smirked when a look of surprise flickered across Jared's face and reached up to run his index finger across the man's temple and brush his hair back.

Jared's heart rate picked up slightly at the touch and a smile flickered on and off his face. "Um. Depends on who's asking. If it's a guy asking, Fight Club or Seven. If it's a girl, Pride and Prejudice." Jared chuckled softly and stared down at Jensen, just barely; it was certainly easier than looking down at everyone else in his life. "But, really, it's Jeux d'enfants. This French movie. Kind of romantic and morbid at the same time. But I don't really tell anyone that." Jared thought Jensen's eyes had somehow hooked him in and looking away was now an impossibility, not that he was complaining.

"I haven't seen that. But, why lie? What does it matter... wait. Okay. A different movie for guys?" Jensen's brow furrowed slightly. Settling his hand on Jared's shoulder he _almost_ thought he could feel the man sway a little closer.

"Well." Jared frowned slightly, wetting his lips, gaze still locked on Jensen. This was all pretty silly in his mind, it would sound even sillier saying it out loud, but Jared hadn't really told anyone so, it couldn't hurt. The worst Jensen could do was roll his eyes, call Jared a fake and that would be that. "People have this, preconceived notion of me you know? It's no big deal, I don't care if people think I'm an asshole or anything, but just, no one really takes me seriously. Last time I told a guy my favorite movie at the moment was Pride and Prejudice he laughed at me until he snorted coffee out his nose. But girls don't seem to mind if I like it. And I tried telling someone Jeux d'enfants is actually my real favorite movie. She thought I was hitting on her and it just, didn't go so well."

Inhaling deeply, Jared bit back the urge to apologize to Jensen for babbling like he did. "I like Fight Club and Seven and Pride and Prejudice. Who can really pick a favorite movie anyway right?" He smiled hopefully at Jensen, taking a step closer to him.

"I'd love to see that movie with you." A little puzzled, Jensen let his hand slide down Jared's back. "You want a coffee? I have an espresso machine. I'm pretty good with it."

"Um. Sure." Jared nodded and curled his fingers into fists in his pockets. He wasn't very sure what to make of Jensen, because all the questions and responses he was anticipating weren't what he was getting and it made Jared twitchy, unprepared for what could come next. "I own it. The movie. Do you speak French?" He could feel Jensen's hand on his back and he liked it, the heat coming off his palm.

Turning slowly, fingers dragging down to Jared's hip Jensen turned and headed over to the counter. He started up the machine and banged out the coffee grounds. "No, do you?" _That_ could be kind of hot. Hot _er_.

"Yeah." Jared nodded, trailing after Jensen. "My mom, she taught me. She cooks. That's not related to her speaking French. Or teaching me. My brother makes movies. Wow. Uh, bunch of random things there huh?" Jared wasn't trying to impress Jensen or anything, but there was the real possibility that Jensen kind of freaked him out, in a good way, he thought.

"So you a good cook? You must be." Jensen unhooked two mugs from the shelf above his sink and set them by the machine as the Espresso dripped out. He watched the way Jared moved, liked it. Even though he seemed to be a bit clumsy there was something oddly graceful about him. Maybe that was the wrong word. _Liquid_. Like he had the potential to be loose and fluid. And _that_ was another hot image Jensen probably could have done without.

Laughing, head tilting back, Jared shook his head and swerved in time to avoid knocking into the random chair near the kitchen. "You would think that. But, no. I'm not really a good cook. I mean, I can follow recipes, and make pretty much the image of a picture in a cook book but it's not..." Jared wet his lips, moving to the counter beside Jensen and curled his fingers over his arm. "Like this. This tattoo? A pro did this and you can tell, any person could trace a picture but when they actually _feel_ it, that's when you get something beautiful. My mom? She puts love and devotion into every dish she makes, and it's always incredible. Me? I just like to trace the outline." Jared released Jensen's arm and shrugged, hip leaning against the counter.

"I like that." Jensen didn't want to step away but he needed to get the milk. "And, for the record. It's okay if you touch my tattoos. I don't mind. Not that you asked." Laughing softly he turned and pulled the fridge open to grab the milk for the steamer.

"Oh. I guess, tattoos, that's like, a part of you huh? It probably drives you crazy when random people just touch them." Jared laughed softly and slid a hand up through his hair, pausing halfway through the action and sighing. Well, he'd made it a while not doing it at least. "So, tell me about you? Um, do you come from around here? Got family around here?"

"Me? Nah. My family's in Texas. I've been on the move a long time, but I like it here. Ocean air, freedom you know?" The milk steamer was noisy and Jensen took advantage of it to stare over at Jared. He watched as Jared's eyes darted around the space then smiled when their eyes connected once more.

"Okay, almost done. Where'd you meet Sandy?" Jensen poured the milk into their mugs and slid one toward Jared. He nodded at the jar of spoons and the sugar so Jared would help himself.

Spooning sugar into his drink, Jared watched his spoon move through the coffee before shrugging. "High school. My freshman year. She wasn't supposed to be there, but the middle school was across the street and she was trying to pretend to be older." Jared laughed, shaking his head slightly. "She's always been a little crazy like that." Bringing the coffee up, Jared sipped then grinned. "Delicious."

"Wanna go sit?" Without waiting for an answer Jensen grabbed his coffee and headed across the room. Flipping on his stereo he kicked off his boots and walked on his knees into the middle of the bed then sat down cross legged.

"Are you sure you want to trust me with coffee on your bed?" Jared asked quietly as he followed him, pursing his lips as he considered things for a moment before carefully slipping out of his shoes. "I might be a hazard to your sheets." Eyes widening, Jared flushed and stared down at his coffee. "I didn't mean that to sound so... weird."

Laughing, Jensen stretched out to put his coffee on the night stand then sat back up. "You're good." Shifting closer to the edge he motioned for Jared to come and stand in front of him. His fingers slipped over the buttons of his shirt quickly, undoing each one as he stared up at the almost fearful expression on Jared's face. Slipping his hands over the man's chest he pushed the shirt down off his shoulders then took Jared's coffee so the shirt could be pulled free. "Coffee stains should be soaked." Jensen's eyes traveled over the broad expanse of Jared's chest, he had the potential to be really built but still had that sort of adorable softness. _Youth_

Standing, Jensen slid almost entirely up Jared's body then leaned over to set Jared's mug down. "I'll just soak it for you," he murmured against Jared's cheek then turned quickly to head over to the sink.

"Shit." Jared whispered as he sank down onto the bed. His skin felt tingly, and his breath was definitely coming a little faster which was embarrassing kind of but mostly he just felt stupidly turned on considering how little the touches were. Shifting onto to the bed, Jared stretched out, toes curling down. It was the softest mattress he'd ever felt and he grinned when his arms lifted above his head and even _then_ he couldn't quite touch from the headboard to the base.

When Jensen returned into the line of his vision he laughed and tucked his hands under his head. "Where did you get such a freaking huge bed?" A moment later he realized what sort of picture he had to be painting and heat stained his cheeks, again.

"M'over six foot. Why get a couch. Beds are better." Wetting his lips, Jensen took in the full view of Jared's lithe body pulled and stretched across the bed. He had a feeling he'd be sketching that later. "I... uh. You know you should _really_ lie there like that all the time while you're here. It's. Well. I like looking at you." Rubbing his palm on his chest Jensen blinked slowly and walked over to pick up his coffee.

He sank back down onto the mattress and shifted over to lean against Jared's hip. "Wanna know what my favourite part of a man's body is?"

"Yeah." Jared slid his forearms under his head the rest of the way so he could look at Jensen better. It was a little nerve wracking to be under the intense gaze of Jensen's but Jared found himself easily sinking in to it. Like Jensen looking at him had the special ability of making him feel like the only person alive.

"Right here." Jensen's curled finger brushed over the downy hair just above Jared's belt, "And here." Slipping his finger just under the waistband he moved it along slowly until it was settled just above Jared's hip. The flush on the guy's face made it all worthwhile.

Jared's breath hitched, chest rising and falling quicker, more shallow. He stared at Jensen, swallowing, wetting his lips, blinking away the sudden flash of lust flaring up in him. "Why?" He whispered, voice noticeably deeper he was sure.

"The touch thing. I like the way things feel." Jensen's finger swept a little closer to Jared's hip bone and he let the heel of his palm press down on the denim. "The way the bone pulls the flesh up, the definition of the muscles there. Usually, when you touch there, a man's body will lift up into the pressure. Just... like you're doing now." Now that Jared's hair had fallen down over his face a little, his cheeks were rosy, lips glistening - Jensen was sure he'd never seen a more beautiful man.

"O-oh." Jared hadn't realized his body was moving up into Jensen's touch but it was, it was responding in all sorts of ways that Jared was pretty sure had to be more than obvious. After all, there he was without a shirt and in jeans a little tighter already so plenty tight now. "You, notice a lot of things? About the human body? About guys?" Jared figured it was Jensen's artistic eye, seeing people through a different light.

"About you," Jensen added. "I've got an artistic eye but you're ... different. I don't know." Shaking his head slowly Jensen withdrew his hand. He had _no_ idea what he was doing with this guy. They seemed to be polar opposites in some ways and it didn't seem likely that much could come of it. "Want your coffee?" Leaning over to the night stand he grabbed it and held it out.

Jared blinked, then again because his mind needed a moment to catch up with the situation. Sitting up slowly he reached out for the coffee and curled his fingers over the mug, careful not to spill a drop. "Thanks." He whispered, bringing it to his lips and taking a small sip. When at least a minute passed in silence he looked over at Jensen and frowned. "How did this go from your fingers down my pants to awkward silences?" Jared's lip quirked in a slight smile, mug carefully balanced in his grasp.

"Silence doesn't have to be awkward. Did you come over here for sex or to get to know me?" Jensen's lips curved into a slight smile and he sipped his coffee.

"What?" Jared almost sloshed the coffee in his mug, catching himself just in time and sighing. "You're the one who took my shirt off and just, you know, with your fingers and, it's been awhile so. Damnit." Jared stared hard down at his coffee, considering if he should just run for it before he made an even bigger idiot of himself. This was the weirdest maybe date he'd ever been on.

"How long? The _while_. How long's it been?" Jensen couldn't imagine that Jared had an iota of trouble finding men.

"I don't know. A few weeks. Months. Maybe more like a year." Jared couldn't get into this without telling pretty much the rest of his story too and he didn't have any idea how Jensen might react to this. "I'm not, I don't... go out. Often. Because, it's complicated. And, a lot of people know me and I'm not, you know." Looking up at Jensen, taking in his expectant eyes as if he knew Jared would get around to finishing his sentence, he sighed once more. "I'm not out."

"Ah. Why not?" Jensen's eyebrows lifted slightly and he leaned over to put his almost empty mug back on the nightstand. He steeled himself for the part of their _getting-to-know-you_ phase when things would start to fall into place. Someone who looked like Jared, and had his sweet personality had to have a hell of a reason for being single.

"Just not." Jared said quietly and brought his coffee up, draining it even though it burned in his throat. "Family, it's important to me, my mom would... just, it wouldn't be good. I think my family would cut me off. And I never had anyone worth taking that step for, so, I didn't." Jared had dated a total of two other guys before and this subject alone had been the ending point. Of course it had come much later with them but, Jensen was maybe amazing, it could be a good thing to find out how it would play out right away.

"You're worth taking that step. Shouldn't do things for other people," Jensen said. He took Jared's coffee cup and leaned over to set it next to his. Fluffing up his pillow he flopped down and patted the spare one as he glanced up at Jared.

Sliding onto his side, Jared propped his hand under his head, staring at Jensen with slight surprise. "You make it sound easy. You know it's not. Doesn't matter how much people have changed and are more accepting, when it's your own family, it's different." Reaching out, hesitantly, Jared let his fingers lay against Jensen's side, sliding across the fabric.

"I don't see people who aren't out." Jensen's smile faded slightly but when Jared made to move his hand away Jensen grabbed it quickly, holding it there. Maybe he pressed Jared's hand down a little, because the teasing touch - too fleeting and light - wasn't quite what he wanted.

"I have a tendency to like the guys with that standard." Jared smiled sadly down at the bed between them, not sure what to make of Jensen holding his hand in place still. "So I guess, we're uh, over before we can begin huh?" His eyes lifted to Jensen's and he felt the pinch of disappointment at the thought. Jensen kept doing these _things_ and Jared was slightly freaked out, mostly turned on and insanely interested. It could have been good.

Leaning forward quickly Jensen buried his face in Jared's neck and breathed in. It was just like he thought. He smelled awesome; like outside and some kind of expensive yet subtle cologne, clean like soap and shampoo. He pressed a lingering open-mouthed kiss to Jared's neck, inhaled once more and leaned back. "I want to see you."

"Jesus." Jared swallowed hard, skin tingling from the still damp patch he could feel from Jensen's lips. "You just, do these things and..." Jared shook his head and blew out a long breath, twisting his hand from under Jensen's so his fingers could slide up just inside his wife beater. "So, then, if you don't see people who aren't out, and I'm not out, this means?" Jensen's abs were smooth and defined beneath his finger tips and Jared let his thumb trace the bottom rib, inching up.

"I break my own rules." Jensen shifted and tugged his shirt off and tossed it over his shoulder. He liked the way Jared touched him, like he really wanted it.

Shifting a little closer Jensen rested his head on the pillow nearest Jared. "Tell me the one thing about yourself that I would never guess." He hooked his fingers back over Jared's belt, thumb settling on the cool metal of the man's belt buckle.

"Besides you're kind of blowing my mind right now?" Jared whispered, eyes sliding down Jensen's chest, lingering on each pierced nipple. _Holy shit_ that shouldn't be nearly so hot.

Unable to resist it, Jared's fingers slid up, just barely tracing over the bar, moving along the skin. "I like, being fucked. Every part of it, being stretched open and claimed and held down." Jared watched his thumb sliding along the piercing and wet his lips. "But, I've only ever been fucked once before."

Jensen had to close his eyes for a moment. Even such slight touches against the barbell made his nipple harden quickly and sent cold lust slithering down to his belly. On top of that sensation he now had a mental image of Jared spread out and _wanting_.

"Why only once?" Jensen's voice was thick and clawed its way out of his throat.

"Because I also have a tendency to pick up guys who want me to top. You know, cock sluts." Jared chuckled throatily and, on an expected burst of confidence, swayed forward to press his lips to Jensen's ear. "Are you a cock slut Jensen?" The thrill of the words zinged straight up Jared's spine and the barbell slid through his fingers once more, he twisted just slightly to see how Jensen would react.

Jensen's body was slammed with a shudder as Jared twisted the barbell. The words didn't help. "No, Jared." His hand gripped Jared's and turned it, increasing the wrench on his own nipple. Trembling he licked his lips and pressed his cheek to the man's before whispering, "But I'm willing to bet you are."

Eyes widening for just a moment, Jared let them flutter closed, sucking in a quick breath. "I-" He pulled at the barbell in his grasp and released a small moan when it only seemed to make Jensen react with pleasure. "What if I am?" Jared managed in a ragged whisper, stomach rolling and clenching at the words. He could feel the heat from Jensen's body and it was mildly intoxicating.

"Well," Jensen had to moan low and heavy when Jared tugged harder. "Guess that could work out well for both of us."

Jensen moved Jared's hand lower on his own body; turning his hand so he could press the man's broad palm over the aching bulge in his jeans. "You feel that?"

"Fuck." Jared's fingers twitched around the hard heat, rolling down to try and get an idea of just how big the man was. Jared wasn't good with guessing but he could see why Jensen said it would be good for both of them. He had no idea how they'd even gotten to this moment, when a few minutes ago they were talking about being out with their families he thought.

"Does it, turn you on? Thinking about fucking me?" Jared had meant more to that question, like would taking someone bigger than him height wise be hot but all the blood was redirecting itself in his body and he didn't have much brain power left.

"Of course it does, _fuck_ ," Jensen growled. Rolling forward quickly he pinned Jared to the mattress and dragged the man's arms up above his head. Curling his fingers around one wrist he held him there.

Jensen's voice grated in his chest. "Bet it turns you on more; wanting my cock inside you, a year huh? Can you even remember what it feels like?" His lips move over Jared's ear. "You know the stretch and burn, the way your body gets that feeling like it has to twist and turn?"

Hips curving up out of his control, Jared gasped sharply, a wave of pleasure at Jensen's words and touch making him nearly dizzy. "O-only, just." He panted, lips turning slightly into Jensen's hair. The man was strong, moving Jared around like it was nothing and _god_ no one had been able to do that kind of thing to him. He wanted more and to run for the hills all at the same time because someone like Jensen really just shouldn't, couldn't, exist. "Fuckin', _really_ turns me on. Thinking 'bout your cock inside me." He turned his head enough to let his lips smear open over Jensen's jaw, wrists twisting slightly beneath Jensen's hands holding him in place.

"Almost a shame," Jensen murmured, "it's not gonna happen today." Thrusting his hips down hard he ground their cocks together. _Yeah_. They both wanted this and there was no way Jensen was giving this guy what he wanted on the very first visit. He wanted _more_ from Jared and hadn't quite figured out how to process that yet.

Sliding off Jared's body Jensen slid his hand down the man's long frame. He watched as Jared's muscles rippled under his palm and sucked in a quick breath. "You know how hot you are?"

"Not." Jared cleared his throat and blinked over at Jensen, dragging his teeth over his lip. "You though? You're really fucking hot and, I didn't think I liked tattoos." He chuckled throatily and sucked in a quick breath, trying to calm himself down. "Why?"

Rolling forward again, Jensen let Jared take all of his body weight and loved the sound of the moan that wisped out of the man's body. Dropping his mouth to Jared's jaw he worked his way along it with a series of nips and kisses. "Why what?"

Head rolling back, Jared's eyes fluttered closed and he slid his hand along the back of Jensen's skull, fingers sliding through short, soft hair. "You won't fuck me today. Why?" It took him a minute to realize how very _slutty_ that made him sound and he forced himself to continue. "Not, that I mind. Waiting. Just, curious." Jensen's lips on his skin was kind of maddening.

"We just met. You don't want to know anything about me before I fuck you? Just want it _that_ badly?" Jensen laughed softly against Jared's neck then bit down hard and let go of his wrists.

"But this? This is okay?" Jared huffed slightly, thinking he shouldn't have told Jensen how long it had been since he'd last been with someone. "You're really, different. You know?" He pushed out from under Jensen and sat up, blinking down at him. "You're kind of, all over the place sometimes. Or maybe I'm just too turned on to think straight." Sighing, Jared flopped back down beside Jensen and pressed up against his side, sliding down enough to catch the barbell in Jensen's nipple between his lips and suck up.

 _That_ was good. Jensen thought Jared needed to have his lips on him more often. "I-" he moaned and pulled back a little to put more tug on the barbell. "Nothing wrong with this," he managed to get out. He'd thought for the briefest moment that Jared was going to leave when he'd moved out from under Jensen's body and he didn't like the way that felt.

"Pleasure doesn't have to be instant," he murmured. Cupping his hand behind Jared's chest he let his nails drag over the man's scalp. "Like tattoos-" he hissed softly when Jared finally got the message and tugged hard on his piercing. Pain-pleasure shot through Jensen's body and he felt that zing of endorphins that he loved.

"Like tattoos," he began again when his body was left with only a buzzing hum of pleasure. "Love getting them, like being stoned almost by the end. My cheeks are all flushed and. And." And, Jared's tongue was about the most fucking distracting thing Jensen had ever encountered. "Wanna know... this fantasy I have?"

"Mmhmm," Jared murmured and rolled on top of Jensen, hips settling over the man's as his body bent and lips traveled across to the opposite nipple. Teeth sliding across the bar, Jared pulled up, twisted slightly until Jensen was hissing once more. He could easily get addicted to the way Jensen reacted to something that had to be slightly painful at least.

"Wanna. _JesusChrist_ ," Jensen sucked in a huge breath. "Christian, want him to work on my chest piece while someone sucks me off." Jensen had never told anyone that but it didn't take much for his mind to go there with Jared. He could pull up a perfect vision of the brown silky locks covering his eyes as he looked up at Jensen, lips spread and stretched around his cock.

Eyebrows lifting, Jared dragged the barbell out, letting it fall from his teeth as he looked up at Jensen. "And... how does Christian feel about that?" He slid his body up slightly, letting his hips roll against Jensen's, cocks grinding together through denim. Jared sucked in a breath at the wave of pleasure before dipping down, sucking at the dip in Jensen's collar bone.

It was a few moments, a few _long_ moments before Jensen could get his voice working. "Kane's done stranger things. He would think it was hot. _Jesus_ Jared your mouth is-" The moan that snatched his breath away kind of finished the sentence for him and Jensen slid his arms around the Jared's waist to pull him down harder against his body.

"You think you might. You might like something like that?" Jensen couldn't help sounding hopeful. He could _die_ happy if Jared contributed to the completion of _that_ fantasy.

"Well." Jared murmured against Jensen's skin, mouth dragging up to Jensen's ear and sliding over the piercing there. "Might have to meet this Kane guy officially first. Didn't before. You know, just to know who's gonna watch me suck your cock." Jared grinned against Jensen's ear and rolled his hips down against Jensen's once more. "I really, _really_ , love sucking cock. Bet yours tastes amazing." He hummed, the words along Jensen's skin, slumping down onto him heavily.

"God, Jared I find it hard to believe you've only been fucked once." The words skittered out of Jensen's mouth tinged with slight awe. It was a miracle to him that someone this hot was as innocent as he claimed. "You. You done that a lot?" Wrapping his arms tight around Jared he stopped the man from moving, pinned him against his chest so he could speak softly against his ear while Jared's lips moved against his neck.

"No. Not a lot." Jared flicked his tongue down Jensen's neck, tasting every inch of his skin. "I've had sex more than once you know? Just only been fucked once. Always did the fucking. Which was _good_ but not..." Jared let himself trail off, humming along Jensen's skin with questing lips. This was seriously the most interesting conversation - in the most interesting circumstances - that he'd ever had.

"MMm okay. Thought you were trying to make me think you were all innocent. Not that that wouldn't be hot too," Jensen's voice disappeared as he spoke and he got caught up in the feelings of Jared's lips again. "Do it," Jensen breathed. Stretching his body out long and lean on the mattress, Jensen rocked his hips up into Jared's body in case there was any confusion about what he wanted.

"Didn't you say something about pleasure not being instant?" Jared muttered but crawled down Jensen's body regardless, sucking each barbell in once more before sliding his tongue down the middle of Jensen's chest, dipping into his belly button. "Gonna make me?" Jared breathed against Jensen's skin and slipped his hands between them flicking the button on Jensen's jeans free, letting his nose slide along the hard length through denim until he could feel the heat against his lips.

Jensen's fingers were in Jared's hair almost instantly; the tight grip had to hurt but _Jesus_ Jensen's restraint only went so far and it was wearing thing. Shoving Jared aside Jensen rolled up and off the bed, tugging his jeans and boxers down to step out of them. Leaning his shins against the edge of the bed he stroked his cock slowly, trailing his fingers on the rigid flesh. "Just do it. No more teasing."

Staring wide eyed at the thick curve of Jensen's cock, Jared slid forward, legs falling on either side of the man's body. Fingers curling around the base of Jensen's cock, Jared stroked in several slow, gliding motions, wetting his lips and pulling in a handful of slow, deep breaths. He was going to give Jensen the absolute best blow job he'd ever had just so he'd call him up again, in case he did anything later that might keep Jensen from wanting a second date.

Mouth parting, Jared slid as close as possible and let his lips circle just over the head of Jensen's cock. His tongue laved slow circles along the head, into the slit, gathering pre-come and learning the taste of the man. Jared had just a moment when it occurred to him he hadn't even _kissed_ Jensen yet before he was sliding down, bending his body and relaxing his shoulders. A few inches down and back up, deeper still and up, then all the way to the base, tongue pressing flat and hard over the skin as he moaned with the tip of Jensen's cock bushing the back of his throat.

"Perfect," Jensen murmured,"fucking perfect." Jared's mouth was like fire on his cock and he'd never been taken so deep by someone. The head of his cock was brushing the back of the man's _fucking_ throat and every time Jared swallowed it was the most amazing sensation. Curling both hands in that soft mess of hair Jensen tightened his grip and pulled Jared closer, _deeper_ , " _fuck_."

The _full_ of Jared's mouth, the way Jensen's fingers curled in his hair, the heat of flesh against his tongue was all good enough to have Jared seriously worried about coming in his jeans. He let his hand slid down to Jensen's balls, rolling them between his fingers; free hand snapping up to Jensen's wrist. With a tug he had the man's hand pulling his hair up, then pushing back down, telling Jensen without words to do as he pleased. Moaning around the man's cock, Jared slid up, teeth just barely grazing along the skin and suctioned his lips over the head, hollowing his cheeks as Jensen's hands on his head pushed him back down.

It was the most sensual feeling in the world, sliding his fingers through Jared's fine hair and holding on to pull that silken mouth back down along his cock. Taking a little more of his weight on his shin Jensen widened his stance and thrust harder into Jared's mouth. He dropped a hand to the man's cheek, cupping the blood-flushed flesh and then sliding his hand back once more to pull him hard forward. He didn't hold back, he _couldn't_ hold back and his hips snapped forward then fell in to a rhythm of thrusting forward and pulling out. The moans that seeped out of Jared's throat sent tingles of sensation up Jensen's cock and he knew he was going to come hard.

Jared rode out each thrust, moans deepening, heart slamming hard in his chest. As Jensen's thrusts became more erratic, harder and deeper, Jared sucked a breath in through his nose and braced himself. Jensen's hand tightened in his hair to the point of painful - sending sparks of sensation down his spine - and he moved to pull out, obviously about to come. Jared's hands curled around his ass, digging into the muscle and drawing him almost up onto his toes, sucking him all the way down.

The initial spray of come slid along the back of his throat, Jared hummed in pleasure, sliding up slightly to catch the taste on his tongue, sucking along Jensen's cock. Jensen's body twitched against his and Jared continued to suck until the man was pulling him off. Blinking up at him, Jared lifted his thumb to sweep along spilled come at the edge of his mouth, sucking it off then smirking up at Jensen.

When Jensen could finally breath without panting he kneeled further on the bed and crawled over Jared's body until the man had no choice but to lie down under him. Curling one arm under Jared's chin, the other over the top of his head he held him close. "Was good," he breathed against Jared's cheek. When he slid his leg across Jared's, pressing down on his crotch he felt the man shift slightly underneath him. Sucking gently on Jared's earlobe, Jensen tongued the velvety soft flesh teasingly.

Moaning low in his throat, Jared turned slightly, blinking at Jensen. His gaze felt slightly blurry from the arousal pumping through him and his hips rolled up against Jensen's leg. "You haven't even kissed me." He murmured, nose sliding along Jensen's cheek. _God_ he needed some release.

"Not gonna kiss you till you come. Want you to always think of that when my lips touch yours." Pressing his leg down hard Jensen saw the tremor of want that shuddered it's way down Jared's body. Lips grazing the man's cheeks Jensen spoke in a thick almost-whisper. "Every time I kiss you, you'll remember the first time you got that flood of release; the crazy spinning, _fucking_ intense flood of coming for the first time with someone."

Nipping at Jared's cheek he slid his thigh up and down the hard ridge in the man's jeans. "You know that feeling?"

Eyes fluttering slowly closed and opened, Jared struggled to consider whether he did know that feeling. "No," he finally decided in a gasped whisper. "Gonna though, soon."

Jared's body twitched up at the thought along. He had no idea how a pair of lips and a guy he was pretty much dry humping was going to blow his mind so much but he already felt more pleasure now than he ever had before, with anyone. "Fuck. Jensen, _please_ ," groaning, Jared rocked his body up, slapping a hand down on Jensen's arm and squeezing the marked skin.

Jensen tugged deftly on the button and zipper of Jared's pants and sank his hand down under the soft cotton of Jared's boxers. Instantly curling his fingers around the heated cock he moaned softly at Jared's ear. "You're _so_ hard." His tongue flicked into Jared's ear to chase his words before he moaned again and stroked up on the rigid flesh in his grasp.

"Yes. God." Jared moaned and thrust his hips up into Jensen's touch, desperate for more. He could still taste the man's come in his mouth, and his breath was hot and so perfect against his ear. "Not-" The heat of Jensen's palm was in constant motion over his skin, one wave of pleasure after another rippling through him and Jared twisted once more, turning to force his eyes open and stare at Jensen. "M'gonna..." he choked out, hips snapping up as the beginning of his orgasm sparked up in him.

Sliding his hand forward to Jared's jaw, Jensen turned him quickly and took his mouth. Wet, hot and crushing he moved his open mouth over Jared's and thrust his tongue forward. The way Jared melted into him, arched up off the mattress in a jerking curve of muscle and breath made Jensen feel like he could come all over again. Jared sucked greedily on Jensen's tongue for a few moments then his mouth simply fell open under Jensen's as his body jolted and Jensen felt the heat of come spreading over his hand.

Jared didn't even acknowledge the end of his orgasm. It simply felt like one, continuous wave of pleasure that he rode out, arms slipping around Jensen's body, pulling and holding him close, kissing him more desperately then he'd realized he wanted. Jensen tasted just slightly like coffee but something else, bolder and darker and Jared was hooked, right there, from one kiss alone. He finally pulled back because the need to breathe was too great and his forehead fell against Jensen's. "Please tell me you'll go out with me again."

"I'll go out with you again. Next time we go for coffee. Talk, I want to know you Jared Padalecki." He'd made a note of Jared's name on his call display and on the credit card if he were honest. He liked the way it rolled off his tongue. "Turns out you're a good kisser."

Jensen nudged at Jared's cheek until he could press their lips together once more before pulling back to let the man recover a little.

Humming softly, Jared closed his eyes, smiling. "You don't know who I am huh?" He said quietly and it wasn't disbelieving, just curious and maybe the slightest side of relieved. It wasn't like Jared himself was a celebrity or anything but he was so used to people in his daily life knowing him, it was wonderful to think he could just be _him_ with Jensen.

"You're Jared. Clumsy, tall, beautiful, hot mouth. Best friend of Sandy with the Katie girlfriend. Scared of needles and one day I'm going to tattoo you and I promise it will be the hottest thing you've ever felt." Jensen nuzzled against Jared's neck and massaged his hand over the man's sweat-damp chest. "There something else I need to know?"

"Nah. Nothing too important." Jared chuckled softly and rolled to capture Jensen's lips once more. "Can I just spend the rest of the day here kissing you?" Jared asked against Jensen's lips. Screw any homework he had, he'd do it later.

"Lemme think." Jensen sat up a little and looked around. "Well, I suppose." Lips twitching into a smile, his eyes crinkled at the corners and he leaned down to kiss the corner of Jared's mouth.


	3. Chapter 3

"Move it just a bit to the right." Christian leaned down closer to Jensen; face almost pressed against the man's arm.

"Like this?" Jensen caught his tongue between his teeth.

"Ooo yeah. I like that."

"God, yeah. Thanks, I just couldn't figure that out." Jensen nodded and looked up at Christian then punched him on the shoulder. He'd been struggling with a Celtic dragon design with a tail that the guy wanted wrapped all the way around his bulging bicep. It wasn't Jensen's usual thing but the guy had agreed quickly to the over-inflated price Jensen had suggested and that made him feel guilty.

Christian had a good eye for Celtic knot-work and the best ways it worked with the human body. Jensen's specialty was more in the landscape and fine line aspects of body art.

"So. When do I get to meet the new man?"

"He's not my man we've been on three dates, one of which didn't make it out of my place." _Not_ that staying at Jensen's had been a problem. Quite the contrary. He hadn't been able to get Jared out of his mind.

"Still. Usually I get to meet them. You know. Stamp of approval and all that." Christian propped his chin on his hands and stared down at the design they were working on. "You bein' careful?"

"I'm being careful. Don't worry." Jensen's brow furrowed and he sat back on his stool, hands dropping to his lap.

"It's just that last time- I mean we had to-"

"Chris, trust me. I'm being careful. I know what I'm like." Forcing a smile onto his face Jensen curled his hand over Chris' shoulder and squeezed. "Jared's a good guy. He's young and I dunno."

"Young doesn't make him good, well, good at some things..." Chris chuckled but it faded away quickly. "Jenny, I can't see you do that again, it was like. _Fuck_ man it tore my heart out." Christian turned his head, hair hanging down over the tattoo design. "You scared me."

"I scared myself." Jensen nodded and kicked at the back of Christian's leg as he swung his leg back and forth. "I'm just lonely, you know? I'm good by myself. I _get_ that. But maybe there's someone for me out there, someone like me, someone who wants the same things? You think?"

Christian's expression softened. "I think maybe there's someone for everyone.

Once upon a time, Jensen had thought that he'd found his someone. His someone just turned out to not be _anything_ like what he thought. It was painful. _Too_ painful for someone like Jensen. What had started out as one of those heart-stopping love affairs went completely sour and the wrong side of fucked up when Jensen started to find out things about Derek. _Derek_. The name still sent the strangest sensation of loss whirling through him.

The thing it had taken Jensen a year and too much therapy to learn was the Derek, well, he never existed. At least not the way he had in Jensen's mind. It was like mourning the death of a lover. Only worse. _Much_ worse. Worse to the point of making Jensen hurt himself in ways he'd never imagined.

The only friend who had stuck with him through it all was Christian. He'd been there the first night that Jensen had cut into his own flesh in anger and sat on his kitchen floor bleeding for an hour before his friend showed up. Christian had been there when Jensen had drunk so much he'd ended up in the hospital with alcohol poisoning. So many times, Jensen had looked up through half-closed eyes and seen that thick long hair and stupid lop-sided grin. Christian was allowed to be worried.

But, there was something sweet about Jared. Something real.

Jensen slid his hand over his tattoo as his mind drifted to the way that Jared liked to touch it, trace the waves. "Maybe you could work on me sometime this week, _after_ hours?"

"Whatcha want?" Christian stood up and picked up the design to hand it to Jensen. His eyes widened slightly when he saw the look on Jensen's face. "Shut up." His mouth fell open.

"I asked him." Jensen smirked. "He wants to meet you first. For obvious reasons, but he said yes. Well, he mostly said yes."

Christian ran his hand down his face. "We've had that chest piece designed for a really long time. You've only known this kid like three minutes. You sure?"

Shrugging, Jensen slid off the stool and gathered a hand-full of Christian's hair. "Pretty damn sure. Wait till you see his mouth in action." Tugging on Christian's hair he let go and snatched his design.

"That is, if you've got the balls to do it. I mean, it was probably all bluster right?"

"Bluster my Texas _fucking_ ass. I'll do it. I know what your taste in men is Jensen. When you bringing the boy in, son?" Christian punched at Jensen's shoulder as he passed him and took off down the hallway.

-=-=-=-

It seemed weird to pull into the parking lot, the first time he came here he'd thought he'd never see it again and here he was, coming in to the place voluntarily. Clutching the fresh sketch book in his fingers - that he wasn't sure Jensen would want because he didn't know what type of books he liked to draw in - Jared bounded across the parking lot, sliding a hand through his hair. He hadn't even called before to check what Jensen's schedule was so he might be just dropping the book off but it was the thought that would count.

Tugging the door open, Jared headed inside, eyes scanning around the clean front room. His eyes settled on the long haired guy behind the counter and he smiled, stepping closer. "Hey, Christian right? I'm Jared. Is Jensen around?"

"Well, _Hell_ o. I've been hearing a lot about you." Christian held his hand out and grabbed Jared's in a firm handshake. "How you doing?"

Jared grinned, surprised to hear that Jensen had talked to Christian about it. Then he remembered the fantasy he'd maybe, sort of promised Jensen he'd fulfill and he blushed. "I'm good. It's good to meet you. How are you?" He could only hope Jensen hadn't mentioned it yet to Christian or something.

"Oh I'm fine." Christian sat back on his stool and crossed his arms. "Jensen's sleepin' by the way. Bastard wakes me up all the time so I'll sit out here and his ass is back there snoozin'. He's lucky he's the boss." Flashing a small smile Christian leaned his elbow on the counter and motioned for Jared to come closer.

"Sounds like a good job to me." Jared laughed, stepping close enough to lean against the counter. "So, he really been talking about me or are you just trying to get my hopes up?" Jared wanted to go back and find Jensen but he supposed it was the better thing to do to get to know Jensen best friend first anyway.

"He's really been talkin' about you. A lot and see? I'm the best friend, yeah? So - if you hurt him. You know that I'll hurt you right?" Christian smiled sweetly and curled his hand over Jared's wrist.

Jared's eyes widened slightly and he stared down at the place Christian's hands covered his. "Got it." He said quietly and blinked at Christian. "I have no intentions of hurting him. I like him. A lot." Jared smiled softly, lifting his shoulders in a shrug.

"Not to put too fine a point on it, but Jensen? He's not what you think. Man's special, y'know?" Christian's expression softened. "And Jared, if you are _half_ the man my best friend seems to think you are? He's a lucky guy." Letting go of Jared's wrist Christian tousled his hair and shoved at his head. "Get the fuck outta here, go see your man."

As Jared walked toward the hall Christian spoke again. "Oh, and the tattoo we're gonna do on Jensen? Can't wait." Grinning, Christian turned to fiddle with the stereo.

Jared tripped over his feet at the words, blushing brightly and hurrying the rest of the way to Jensen's room. The man was passed out on the table, Jared grinned as he stepped in and slid the door closed, crossing to Jensen and peering down at him. His lips were parted, soundlessly moving, and Jared's heart flipped in his chest before he leaned down, deciding kissing Jensen awake sounded like a brilliant idea. Hand planting firm on Jensen's chest, Jared flicked his thumb over the barbell and deepened the kiss, sweeping his tongue forward along the curve of Jensen's lips.

If Jensen lived to be a hundred he'd probably never be woken up in a better way. Startled from a dream, well, about Jared, suddenly Jensen had lips on his and a tongue sweeping hotly through his mouth and _Jesus_ the pressure on his piercing. _Jared_. The name just slid into his mind like it was a sensation more than anything. _Jared_. Without evening opening his eyes Jensen slid an arm around the man's neck and tightened it to make Jared lean further over the table.

Retreating from Jared's mouth _just_ enough Jensen murmured, "mornin'."

"Pretty sure," Jared chuckled softly against his lips, deepening the kiss for a moment before drawing back slightly. "It's the middle of the afternoon." He grinned against Jensen's lips and flicked his thumb one more time over the barbell before pulling back completely. "Brought you a gift." Jared set the leather bound sketch book on Jensen's chest, smiling. "Hope you like it."

Blinking a few times Jensen curled his fingers round the edge of the book and lifted it up. "Wow, Jared..." Using one hand to push himself up he smiled, the kind of smile that made his cheeks ache. "What's... you didn't have to do this." Shaking his head slowly he opened the book and caressed the smooth paper with his fingers.

"I know. I just, saw it. Thought of you. I'm one of those people who likes to buy things for the people I like." Jared grinned and dipped down, running his nose along Jensen's jaw. "Oh yeah, met Christian too. Something you wanna tell me about specific tattoos?" He grinned against Jensen's jaw, still slightly flushed by the idea.

Keeping one hand on the cover of his sketchbook Jensen slid the other over the thin material of Jared's t-shirt. "Might have mentioned the possibility of him. You. Tattoo-" a low rumble of a moan broke off Jensen's words and he swung his legs down so he could sit on the edge of the table and pull Jared in close.

Setting the book down on the table Jensen slid his hands up through Jared's hair. "You. Are. Crack." Laughing softly he dipped down and shoved Jared's collar aside to suck hard on the skin for a few moments. "Crack made specifically for Jensens," he mumbled.

"Mm, maybe. Didn't think, Jensen was a common name. You should be safe." Jared mumbled the words and swayed his body closer. "Kinda, maybe, bought the book, so I had an excuse to see you." He chuckled deeply and slid his hands along Jensen's thighs, squeezing roughly.

"Want a tattoo?" Jensen blinked innocently.

"What?" Jared pulled back slightly, eyes widening. "Like, now? No way, that's insane." He laughed nervously, shaking his head.

"Want a piercing? Chris is one of the best." Jensen smiled as sweetly as he could manage.

Jared's face flushed and he swallowed. "I wouldn't even know what to pierce. I'd look stupid with a piercing." He thought maybe Jensen was trying to kill him.

"I'm runnin' out of ideas here." Jensen grinned and slid his hand down to squeeze Jared's ass. "Wanna take me out and I'll buy you a coffee? I'm hungry. You hungry?" Shuffling his ass a little closer Jensen dragged his teeth along Jared's collar bone.

"Uh huh." Jared murmured and pressed as close as he could. "Coffee. Is not food. But, yeah." Jared laughed throatily and detached himself before he just dropped down and filled his appetite with Jensen. Though he thought the man might not complain.

"Tell you what, if you can design a tattoo for me, and I like it, I'll get one. But it has to be special you know?" It would be permanent after all and Jared did kind of want to try it out, just to see if he could handle it. "Sandy's already talking about getting another one. On her ass of all places."

"Oooh, she's got a nice ass." Jensen grinned when Jared raised an eyebrow at him. "What? I'm like ninety-nine percent gay. The one percent of me that isn't apparently thought she had a nice ass. Besides, women are beautiful. Bring her in - or encourage her to book an appointment so I get to spend another afternoon working on her and staring at you, touching your leg under the table."

Jensen leaned back on his hands and tucked his legs around Jared so the man couldn't get away.

"Okay, I'll have her book an appointment. She lives with me, did you know that? She and Katie have the third floor of my house." Jared chuckled and shook his head, wondering if that sounded as odd as it felt to say. "She wants you to come over for dinner soon. So you can meet Katie and they can drool over you." Jared wasn't sure how he felt about it really, Jensen was like a whole different part of his life and he wasn't sure he wanted to merge the two worlds.

"You have three floors in your house? Wait. You _own_ a house? I didn't think people your age owned houses. Aren't you a student?" Jensen frowned and dropped his gaze for a few moments. Did it really matter if the guy had a house?

"Well. It was a gift, when I turned twenty one, from my dad. It was actually more of a here, have a house, and move out of ours gift." Jared shrugged and dropped his head. He felt a little guilty, not explaining to Jensen just how different his life really was from the average student, but who cared about money and famous family members? He'd mentioned his brother and his mom before anyway, so that was something.

"I won't keep it when I graduate. I want to get my own place for myself you know? Something I pay for. Or maybe if..." Jared scrunched up his face, shaking his head to stop the _maybe if we're together then still, we could move in together_ line of thought. That was jumping the gun. "I'm sorry I didn't say something about it before, I guess it doesn't seem like a big deal to me anymore."

"No no," Jensen shrugged. "Jared, we've had three dates, we hardly know anything about each other. We've got a lot of talking to do right? Long as you're not an axe murderer or something. Or you know, married, or, like have a criminal record. Been in jail." Yeah, thanks for _that_ Derek. "You haven't. Have you? Been in jail? Or been married?"

Laughing softly Jared shook his head. "No. No jail and no wife, past or present or future. Worst I've had is a couple speeding tickets." Jared shrugged and reached out to touching Jensen's arm. "You um, haven't, have you? Been in jail? Or married?" The married thing wouldn't bother Jared too much as long as Jensen wasn't secretly married now or something, but he figured he should know.

"No. Never married, never been in jail. I stole a nail once from a hardware store but my Dad caught me and gave me hell. Was embarrassing. And I speed sometimes but never deliberately. I'm usually listening to loud music." Jensen felt relief shimmer down his body. "I'm glad about the no jail thing. You wanna go get some coffee now?"

"Sure." Jared wondered why the jail thing mattered, but he'd ask about it later. Stepping back, he held out his hand and laced his fingers through Jensen's as the man slid off the table.

-=-=-=-

Jensen grabbed Jared's hand and dragged him toward the posters outside the theatre. "That Dragon thing starts at- _Oh_ , have you seen Vortex? Look!" Yanking on Jared's hand he pulled the man toward the poster down at the end. "It's like this action thing but it's scary too so you'll have to let me comfort you. Do you want to-"

"No." Jared said too sharply and tugged Jensen away from the poster before he could get close enough to read it. Because his brother had to be egotistical enough to have _A film by Jeff Padalecki_ plastered on the top. Jared had been holding his breath ever since Jensen suggested going to a movie, and coming to a theatre downtown only helped slightly, knowing the chance of running into anyone from school was much more slim here then at the Cineplex by the college. "I want to see the one with the Dragon thing, I don't um, I heard Vortex sucks." Which was a lie, it had been getting great reviews all over the place but Jared couldn't sit through his brother's movies.

A puzzled expression moved over Jensen's face and he stepped back a little. "Uh, okay. Didn't know you felt so strongly about dragon movies." He smiled slightly and glanced up at Jared's face quickly before looking away. "You had a bit too much sugar today? I was gonna suggest Junior Mints but maybe we should get popcorn."

Turning slowly Jensen wandered over to line up for their tickets. He'd been hoping for the scarier film just to encourage some hand holding and maybe a few kisses or more. It wasn't like he could _not_ think about things like that. It had been a long time since Jensen had been with someone and Jared was all kinds of amazing. When he wasn't being all freaky weird about kid's movies.

Rubbing a hand down his face, Jared was just about to head over to Jensen, explain why they couldn't see the stupid ass Vortex movie and suggest whatever horror slasher flick was out right now but the call of his name had him rooted to the spot. It was happening a lot, more and more since this stupid campus magazine had come out doing some weird profile on him. Kids he didn't even know were pretending to be his friend and it was just his luck these girl's should happen to be _here_ of all places.

"It is you! We thought so. My friend and I were just going to the club but we heard they're being super picky about who they let in tonight. Of course _you_ probably never have to worry about something like that. Are you here with Sandy?" The girl, some brunette Jared couldn't recall the name of but he thought he recognized her from his advanced calculus class, beamed over at her friend like she was proud she knew Jared.

Casting a furtive glance behind him at Jensen in line, Jared shrugged and tucked his hands into his pockets. "No. I'm here with my... with Jensen. A, friend." He felt the sharpest prick of guilt at the words and tried to reason with himself that a handful of dates didn't necessarily mean him and Jensen were boyfriends anyway. "What are you girl's gonna see?" He asked to be polite, looking back again to see how close Jensen was to being done. He was ordering their tickets now and Jared flinched.

"Vortex, of course. You've probably seen it a lot though huh? Did your brother let you onto the set? Oh my god did you get to meet any of the actors? I bet you know loads." The girl beamed at him and her friend giggled shrilly.

"No. I don't really know any." Jared frowned and stepped back a little. "Well it was nice to-"

"Hey I got tickets to your weird dragon- oh. Sorry, I didn't know you were talkin' to anyone." Jensen reached out for Jared's hand and missed when Jared shifted quickly. "I'm..." his eyes moved to Jared's face - the man was sweating, even looked a little pale like he'd seen a ghost or something. "I'm Jensen," he said softly.

"Hey," the brunette looked at him strangely, sharing a look with her friend before shrugging. "I'm Ashley, this is Mary. So you're Jared's friend? Too old for school, how do you two know each other? Is it some sort of pact that hot guys hang out together?" She batted her lashes at Jensen and grinned, flicking her hair over her shoulder.

A flare of jealousy shot up in Jared, adding to the shame he felt for dodging Jensen's attempt to hold his hand. When Jensen just looked up at him, Jared felt even worse. "We met, when Sandy got her tattoo. Jensen did it. We should get into our movie. You girls have a good time."

"I'm sure we will. Tell your brother we just _love_ him. Nice to meet you Jensen, maybe we'll see you around some time." Ashley stepped forward slightly, winking suggestively at Jensen.

"Come on." Jared snagged Jensen's coat sleeve and led him quickly inside, glad to be out of sight of the girl's who were giggling behind them. He was more than a little relieved when they got into the main theatre and handed their tickets over. Jared rubbed a hand through his hair, blowing out a low breath. "Should I get the popcorn? Or Jr. Mints Or both?" He suggested quietly.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Jensen took a step back and folded his arms across his chest.

Dropping his hands to the side, Jared frowned at Jensen and lifted his shoulders in a shrug. "I just, um. Come on Jen, you know I'm not... out. And stuff. And I just, those girls are from my school they think," Jared sighed and ran a hand roughly through his hair. "I'm trying okay? It's just going to take time." He felt like shit, and horrible that he'd not been strong enough to tell those stupid, nameless girls how important Jensen was to him already.

"So. Rule number one is don't touch you in public I guess." Jensen moved forward with the line of people. "I don't want anything - so get whatever." It was bitter and stupid but he was more pissed off than he expected. It wasn't so much the hand thing. Really, he should have thought about that. It was just the look on Jared's face. The way he looked like he'd rather eat a bag of nails than be seen with Jensen by someone he knew. He didn't really need that kind of feeling stirring in his gut.

"I don't want anything." Jared said quietly and folded his arms over his chest. He should have said no the minute Jensen suggested a movie. They should have gone and done something else. Something where Jared wouldn't have made that look appear on Jensen's face. "Do you still want to see this? We could go." He followed after Jensen, staring at the back of Jensen's head.

"Whatever you want, Jared." Jensen stuffed his hands in his pockets and ducked out of the food line up. Walking over to the side of the lobby he leaned against the wall. "What do you want to do? See the movie or you can drop me off at home?" He didn't want to meet Jared's gaze and looked over the man's shoulder, watching the movie-goers as they wandered past.

"Jensen," Jared stepped closer, running his fingers along the back of his neck then dropping his hand, reaching out to touch Jensen's arm. "I'm sorry. How can I make this better? Please? I don't want to damage this." He didn't look around him, kept his eyes on Jensen as he stepped in and slid his hand down, fingers brushing over Jensen's wrist.

"S'alright." Jensen didn't really have it in him to be mad at Jared for very long. The man looked like someone had just killed his best friend or something. "It's fine, I just - that's why I don't see people who aren't out. You know? I just forgot that you-" he shrugged away the rest of his sentence and finally looked up at Jared. "You wanna see the movie?"

"I guess." Jared shrugged and pulled his hand back, stuffing them into his pockets. He definitely didn't want to _not_ spend time with Jensen, that was for sure.

It was uncomfortably quiet as they moved through the theatre to find theirs, heading inside and finding seats halfway up the rows. Jared shifted in his seat, trying to find a comfortable position for his tall frame. He glanced over at Jensen and pursed his lips, trying to find a way back into the good thing they had going. "Do you want to come to dinner at my place on Saturday?" He asked quietly, folding and unfolding his arms across himself.

There was a hollow feeling in Jensen's chest; that gnawing sort of _this-feels-all-wrong_ kind of feeling that Jensen hated. "Sure." Jensen shifted his arm off the arm-rest and leaned away from Jared trying to give the man more room. "Gotta be at the shop till six though. Is that too late?"

"No. It's good. We can have everything ready when you come." Jared blew out a slight breath and let his hand drop on the arm rest, reaching out for Jensen's a moment later. "I'm. Jensen. Please don't be upset with me. I can go and find those girl's. I could tell them. I will. I'll tell them you're my boyfriend and we're here on a date." Jared said in a rush, threading his fingers through Jensen's.

Jensen laughed quietly. "They'd probably think that was a bit strange." Squeezing Jared's fingers gently he left his grasp loose so Jared could pull his hand away. "You don't have to be something you're not ready for. Not for me."

Turning slightly Jensen smiled slightly when his eyes met Jared's. "Being out isn't something you do for someone else Jared. You do it because it just feels weird to have to _not_ be who you are. Maybe you're still figuring that out." Turning back to look at the screen Jensen shrugged. "S'all good," he murmured. It wasn't. All good. It was shit, but this was something Jensen had known about up front so he could hardly blame Jared for it.

"Okay." Jared whispered and kept his fingers tightly threaded through Jensen's even as the theatre fell into darkness.

They didn't talk during the movie, but Jared kept his hand in Jensen's and only half paid attention to the movie. He had no idea who was saving who or what the hell was going on with the completely fake looking dragon. The graphics were shit, he could pick that much up for sure. Jared understood what Jensen meant, needing to come out for himself, make those big moves, but how could he possibly be strong enough to do that without someone at his side?

Truth was, Jared had known this needed to happen a while ago. Sandy was pushing him more and more about it. Because Jared pretending to be straight meant Sandy had to be too. People on campus thought he and Sandy were dating and therefore Sandy couldn't be her true self with Katie. When it came down to it, Jared was an awful friend, and an awful boyfriend, and generally all around horrible.

By the time the movie was over he couldn't even get himself to fake a smile and he was relieved to be out of the stupid cramped chair. "That sucked." Jared muttered as they stood and filed out of the rows of seats. He wasn't really talking about the movie, maybe partially; he hadn't paid attention enough to it to really form an opinion.

"That hand holding part was good," Jensen muttered. He resisted the urge to press his hand to the small of Jared's back as they filed out of the theatre.

"Yeah, that's true." Jared nodded. When they were out in the lobby he took Jensen's hand and led him for the door at a normal pace - forced, because instinct had him wanting to speed up but he wasn't allowing it. "So, you probably have work early right? No, ice cream or anything now?" He tried a small smile, looking over at Jensen.

"How about you take us through a drive-in and we get something and eat it in the car. Then you can take me home?" The night hadn't gone at all how Jensen had thought it would. He wanted to end on a brighter note; wanted the relaxed man back he'd started out the evening with.

"Okay." Jared nodded and led the way outside, guiding them toward his SUV. He still felt like apologizing but had sense enough to know it would probably be old by now. And kind of useless. Walking Jensen to the passenger door, Jared forced his eyes on the man and reached out, cupping his jaw and leaning forward to brush their lips together. They were mostly in the shadows of the parking lot and no one was around, but he thought it was maybe something. "You know I just, that you're. You're really important to me Jensen. And I don't want to disappoint you."

"You're not disappointing me." Jensen slid a hand up through Jared's hair. "I knew." He shrugged, that was really all there was that he could say. He _had_ known that Jared didn't want to come out, or at least, hadn't come out yet. Maybe public outings needed to be rethought - or... something. "Come on, you promised me ice cream."

"Right." Jared nodded and stepped away, heading around for the driver's side. He still felt guilty, still felt like shit, and knew it was all his own fault. Everything had always been easy for Jared, this though; this was so very not easy it wasn't even funny.

Not knowing what to say, Jared drove in silence to a nearby Diary Queen, ordering Jensen's request then his own. They parked not too far from the fast food place and Jared listened to the tick of the engine as it cooled, flipping spoonfuls of his ice cream over on top of the gathering, melting mass. "How's work?" He tried in a quiet voice, sticking with something safe.

"Good... Jared? We're okay. I just gotta adjust - don't get all weird on me. It's been a long time since I had to pay attention to where I was when I reached out for someone. You've got boundaries and I can respect them." Jensen poked his spoon into his blizzard.

"Sorry." Jared breathed and glanced over at Jensen, slumping back in his seat. "It's more than that though. By not being out I'm forcing you not to be yourself and Sandy. And it's all because I'm just too scared. So I should stop being stupid and just tell everyone but my parents... my mom. She means the world to me. I just don't know how she'll react, and if it goes bad, if I lose her..." Jared could hardly even stand the idea of his mom disowning him for liking guys, for not getting Sandy as the perfect daughter-in-law, for everything she'd think she was missing out on by having a gay son. "It's stupid."

"Jared, _Jesus_ , it's not stupid. You take your time and things will work out. Fuck, you and I have had what? Four dates? I'm not that big a deal in the big scheme of things." Dropping his gaze to his blizzard Jensen scooped up a spoonful of it. "I only got M&M's in it 'cause I thought you might share then." Smiling softly he held out the spoon, "want a bite?"

Not wanting to be the reason Jensen got more irritated, Jared leaned over and pulled the ice cream off the spoon, rolling the taste around his mouth. "S'good." He said quietly and dipped his spoon into his own ice cream, offering it out to Jensen. Jared thought now would be a perfect time to have the ability to turn off his brain, so he could stop over thinking things - like what Jensen meant by not that big a deal in the big scheme of things.

Jensen leaned over and sucked the ice cream off Jared's spoon, then leaned a little closer to the man and flicked his tongue over Jared's finger. "I hate when you don't smile," he said quietly.

"Guess I'm just over thinking things." Jared shrugged and gave Jensen a half smile before tucking into his ice cream. He told himself he'd feel better about all this in the morning, when he could shove it all away like usual. "Five." He muttered and looked up at Jensen. "Five dates. The getting coffee thing the other day counts. In my big scheme of things."

"I hadn't added in tonight yet, 'cause I like to think of the date ending at that part where you drive me home and I drag you inside so we can make out for a while. You familiar with that part?" Jensen smiled crookedly and offered Jared another spoonful.

"Sounds a little familiar." Jared nodded and shrugged off more of the tension seeping through him, leaning forward to cover Jensen's hand with his own and draw the spoon into his mouth, sucking it off slowly and deliberately lifting his eyes to Jensen's.

"So," he murmured through ice cream, "set a date for your new tattoo?" That was something Jared could certainly think about to distract his brain.

"Well," Jensen's eyes moved down to Jared's lips then back up, "Christian has the design all ready. It's gonna sort of join up to this shoulder piece and be like water and waves rushing down over my chest. Was just waitin' to see if you were still interested. I mean - that's kind of a big request, yeah?" Jensen's smile softened and he held up another spoonful of ice cream because there was only one thing better than eating it and that was watching Jared lick and suck it off the spoon.

"Said I would." Jared shrugged and lapped more ice cream off the spoon, laughing softly when Jensen almost immediately offered him more. "You take that, gotta get my own in too." He smiled over at Jensen, digging his spoon back into the Blizzard. "So, Christian's gay? Or bi?" Jared had come up with all these crazy reasons why the man would just go along with Jensen's fantasy, he had to at least be comfortable with the thing.

"He's gay, but he's kind of old school gay. Still goes to clubs and picks up guys, stuff like that. Very _free_ sexually. Anyway, he gets the whole tattoo thing, endorphins, the flush and the buzz..." Jensen blushed a little because it was hard to explain to someone who'd never had that sort of feeling.

Jensen stirred his blizzard a little. "People tattoo for different reasons, I think maybe he gets off on it." Jensen laughed softly. "Getting good lookin' guys on his bed and tattooing them until they're all hot and sweaty. Adventure? I dunno. Seriously, Jared if it bothers you we don't have to do it. Was just a ... thing. Spur of the moment."

Eyebrows lifting, Jared glanced unbelieving at Jensen. "Seriously? I highly doubt it was spur of the moment. I think you've been thinking about it for a long time." He smiled softly and stabbed his spoon into his ice cream.

"It's not that it bothers me. I uh, actually kind of think the whole thing is hot. Just wanted to make sure everyone was on the same page, so no one is weirded out by anything." Jared found he liked the idea of Christian watching him getting Jensen off more appealing than he'd even admit to himself. "Christian uh, he won't want... anything, right? To touch or me to... you know." Jared gestured with his spoon, flinging a bit of ice cream onto the dash.

"What?" Jensen blinked and stared wide-eyed over at Jared. "I. Wow. No? Did you want him to? I don't know?" Maybe he hadn't thought the whole thing out enough. He wasn't sure what the right answer was to that question and searched Jared's face for a hint of what the man was thinking.

"No." Jared looked up at Jensen, pursing his lips. "I kind of thought we were exclusive. We are right? Christian's okay, I don't mind him watching, but you know, it's me and you in the end right?" Jared had been raised in a life were you got all your facts first, knew what you were going into, and these last few questions were making him more okay with the idea.

Relieved that Christian hadn't somehow managed to work his mojo on Jared, Jensen let his smile take over his mouth again. "Yeah. It's you and me." Jensen nodded and lifted the spoon to Jared's lips again. "And maybe some ice cream because _shit_ you are hot when you do that... tongue thing. Do the tongue thing."

Laughing softly once more, Jared leaned forward and flicked his tongue over the spoon before drawing in the ice cream once more. At least things were going to be ending a bit better than Jared had anticipated, and somehow they'd figure out a way to make things work with the whole being out in public thing.

-=-=-=-

"Jared," Katie hummed as she flicked her tongue over the spoon of sauce. "This is so delicious. Good God Jensen is one lucky guy."

It wasn't. Delicious anyway. Sure it tasted just fine but compared to his mom's it was crap. Jared would never have dared to serve her such a poor representation of her famous three tomato sauce. This was why he always went to her for get togethers. Like earlier that day. He hadn't seen her in almost three weeks and one giant hug from the woman had made any lingering tension he had been carrying from the last few days slip off his shoulders. Until, that is, he told her that he and Sandy weren't together anymore.

The conversation went something like, his mom's screech of surprise and wide eyes and clatter of a spoon from the pot of soup she was stirring. Of course she'd demanded to know the reason, she'd been so upset she was almost crying and Jared felt mildly guilty but not as much as he did thinking about lying to cover Jensen up. No, he didn't tell his mom about Jensen, but he had to let her get over the Sandy thing first. She didn't seem to understand that they could break up and still be friend's, that he wasn't going to kick her out of his house, and he definitely didn't mention Katie because it wasn't his place to out Sandy.

Besides then it would look like Sandy dumped him for a girl or something and he didn't want his mom to be mad at her.

So Jared was torn on whether this was a good step or not but it was definitely a step - even if he couldn't really tell Jensen without risking him being upset over the fact that, apparently, everyone on campus and in his family thought he and Sandy were a couple. It was all far too complicated for Jared's taste and he wished he could just have a normal, fun relationship with Jensen that didn't include so many insane complications.

When the doorbell rang Jared started, eyes moving beyond to the kitchen to the living room. He tugged off the apron he was wearing - thankful for it considering it was splashed in tomato sauce and smeared with garlic sauce - and tossed it onto the counter before sliding his hands back through his hair and breathing deeply. Jared had no idea why he was nervous about Jensen seeing his house but he was. Maybe because when he'd gotten it as a gift it had come fully furnished and decorated. Jared hadn't picked out anything on the inside and most of the time it looked like a picture from a magazine.

Jared headed for the door, trying not to be too nervous and hoping he could make it through the entire meal without spilling on his white shirt. He maybe made poor fashion choices when it came to food. Tugging open the door, Jared grinned at Jensen, heart flipping in his chest at just the sight of the man. The last rays of sunshine caught along his hair and made it shine, shadowing the rest of his face and making the sprinkle of freckles across his nose oddly prominent. It hit Jared like a sledge hammer in the gut that he could see himself falling completely head over heels in love with this guy.

That thought alone was enough to have Jared stepping forward, slipping his hand under Jensen's coat and pressing it hard and flat into the man's lower back. Before he could even manage a greeting he had Jensen up against his chest, lips sliding over Jensen's in a long, steadily deepening kiss.

Oh there were a few things Jensen was _going_ to say but the way Jared kissed him kind of wiped his mind clear. It was one of those kisses that he would remember; the kind that took his breath away and instantly sent fingers of heat sneaking up his spine. When Jared's lips finally slid away, forehead pressing to Jensen's cheek and they could both take a breath Jensen murmured, "Did you miss me or something?"

"Mm. Yeah. I did." Jared breathed and pressed a small kiss right beneath Jensen's ear before stepping back, grinning at Jensen. "Are you saying you didn't miss me? God, I see how it is." He huffed, rolling his eyes slightly but still grinning at Jensen, still catching the edge of Jensen's shirt beneath his fingers.

"Oh. I missed you." Jensen left no room for confusion with the expression on his face. He _had_ missed Jared, if he were being completely honest he'd have to say he missed the man the moment he was gone.

Taking a deep breath he looked around Jared and peered into the house. "So. House is huge." He shrugged and rubbed at the back of his neck before remembering the flowers he was holding off to the side. "Oh! Here." He shoved the flowers toward Jared's chest. He wasn't sure if people did that anymore, flowers, or if men _ever_ did it. But well, it had seemed like a good idea an hour earlier.

"You brought me flowers?" Jared's eyebrows arched and his grin stretched impossibly wider. "And just when I thought you couldn't get any more perfect." Jared laughed and stepped back, waving Jensen in. "Come on in, um. Just, let it be noted that I didn't decorate, it came this way, I swear I don't secretly spend all my free time at Pier One Imports or something." Jared made room for Jensen in the foyer but not much, sliding up by him to help slip off his coat, bending to kiss his shoulder softly. He wanted to be all over Jensen all the time and was suddenly very grateful they were only having dinner with Sandy and Katie. "It's great to see you."

Jensen laughed, deep and warm, the way he nearly always did after kissing Jared. "Your place and mine are kind of polar opposites aren't they?" It really did look a bit like it had slid right off the pages of a fancy catalog.

"Maybe." Jared didn't like to think of it that way, it made him realize how different he and Jensen were. "They're both clean?" He prompted and smiled sheepishly. "Ready to meet the girls?" Threading his fingers through Jensen's, Jared tugged him forward and as subtly as possibly brought the flowers up to smell deeply. They were lovely, no one had ever brought Jared flowers before and he grinned as he led Jensen through the foyer, down the hallway and into the large stainless steel kitchen.

Katie was stirring the sauce, taking a sip every couple of stirs and Sandy was through the opposite room in the dining room, sliding plates in front of seats. She turned in time to spot Jensen and grinned, bouncing over to him. "Jensen! It's so good to see you." She threw her arms around him in a hug, squeezing Jensen and pushing up on her toes to place a kiss on his cheek.

"Okay, not as good as Jared's greeting but a good one none-the-less." Jensen held her back and peered down at her leg. "Lookin' good. You like it still?" Sometimes people changed their minds when they realized they had to get up every morning and see the same tattoo.

"God of course. It's gorgeous. Did Jared tell I'm going to get another one? Oh god, before I make her angry, Jensen this is my girlfriend Katie, Katie, this is the brilliantly talented Jensen." Sandy slid back, tugging the blond up to her side.

"Hey, between the two of them I think you might have a shrine built in your honor sometime soon." Katie laughed as she shook Jensen's hand. "Good to meet you though."

The corner of Jensen's mouth pulled up into a shy smile. "I heard quite a glowing review about you at the tattoo shop Katie. Nice to meet you finally." It was all a little overwhelming and Jensen found himself drifting back a little to stand closer to Jared.

Arm sliding around Jensen, Jared grinned and turned to let his nose run through Jensen's hair, breathing in his smell. "The girls have been giggling about this all week."

"I don't giggle. I laugh with a faint trill," Katie huffed in her most dignified manner and grinned at Jensen before dragging Sandy further into the kitchen. "We're just putting the rest of the stuff together. Jared made the most delicious meal, you're gonna love it."

"It is not the most delicious, please don't raise his expectations." Jared rolled his eyes, stooping down to press a kiss to the corner of Jensen's mouth before stepping away and offering Jensen a plate of bread and a grin. "Sandy made the bread though; I can promise it's fantastic."

"Damn right it is." Sandy laughed, helping Katie dish pasta into a bowl.

Reaching for a piece of bread Jensen grinned. "I'm sure it's all great." His eyes trailed round the kitchen. It was pretty damn fancy compared to Jensen's random counter and sink he had set up along one side of his imagined square space in the warehouse. "You have a lot of appliances," Jensen said as Jared whipped past him again on some mission.

"Yeah, you know, I'm not really sure why." Jared shrugged, crossing through to the dining room to deposit some salad dressings on the table.

"Like that thing." Sandy pointed to some mixer thing on the counter and shrugged. "We've been here over a year and still haven't figured out what it's for. It's weird." Still laughing, Sandy guided Jensen toward the dining room. "Have a seat."

"It took Katie almost three months to learn how to work the toaster thing, because it doesn't have slots, it's those things and..." Jared sighed and shook his head, laughing when Katie threw a piece of carrot at him.

"Not my fault your family insists on giving you the biggest and the best of everything. There are perks to this insane house though, trust me." Katie slid into the seat beside Sandy, across from Jared and Jensen, grinning at Jensen. "The showers? Pretty much big enough for four or five people."

"Your family must be doing okay for themselves then Jared?" Pulling his chair in closer to the table Jensen noticed a fleeting look pass between Jared and Sandy and wondered if he'd inadvertently said something wrong.

Katie cleared her throat and offered the salad to Jensen, smiling softly. "I'd say Jared's family is pretty well off. Wouldn't you agree Sandy?"

"Mmhmm. Very well off." Sandy muttered and narrowed her eyes at Jared.

"I told you, my mom's a chef. My dad's in real estate. So you know. There's an in there." Jared narrowed his eyes right back at Sandy, just slightly shaking his head. He wasn't _lying_ , really, just omitting a few details that weren't that important anyway. So what if he came from a stupidly wealthy family that were kind of celebrities in their own right? It wasn't like Jared himself was famous in any means. "How was work today Jensen? Any cool tattoos?" He glared at Sandy again when she sighed softly and shook her head down at her plate.

Jensen wasn't stupid. He could see the undercurrent of tension that had appeared between the girls and Jared. He supposed it could be one of those things where Jared was a bit distanced from some of his family or maybe there was an entirely different set of strange dynamics going on at the table and Jensen just wasn't reading it right.

Smiling hesitantly Jensen focused his gaze on Jared. "My Mom works with street kids. I have no idea what my Dad does. That sounded heavier than I intended it to." Jensen laughed softly and stuffed some bread into his mouth.

Any time Jared had asked about Jensen's family before he would answer briefly and change the topic, Jared had enough of his own issues to understand Jensen's lack of wanting to discuss some things so he'd let it go. Katie and Sandy, however, didn't know Jensen like Jared did.

"Not close with your family?" Sandy asked curiously around bites of salad.

"Well, my mom and I email a bit. We had a kind of parting of the ways over the fact that my dad beat the shit out of me when I told him I was gay. I thought that wasn't okay, she wasn't prepared to stand up for me." Jensen realized he was staring at his plate and had _no_ idea why he was suddenly talking like it was the most important thing in the world to get out.

Glancing from Sandy's gentle gaze over to Jared's wide-eyed look Jensen smiled. "She divorced him years later and I think the street kids might be a bit of penance you know? She works with young gay and lesbian youth. That's why I'm - like - _out_. Want to set a good example for people so no one has to go through getting a broken arm when they tell their father." Looking down at his plate he sucked in a breath and grinned.

"Holy shit. I got no idea where that all came from. I'm sorry." Jensen shrugged a shoulder and smiled warmly at Sandy. "Guess sometimes, someone just asks at the right time.

"You never said." Jared dropped his hand, laying it over Jensen's thigh and squeezing softly. He was almost shocked to hear the news, trying to imagine what it must have been like for Jensen. Suddenly the being out thing made a lot more sense in his mind.

"My parents kicked me out. When I told them I liked girls." Katie said softly and smiled at Jensen. "It sucks. Maybe though, you'll reconnect with your mom someday? Jared said you're from Texas originally, is that where she is?"

Jensen gripped Jared's hand tightly. Now the initial burst of words was over he felt a bit like he'd kind of laid himself bare on the table. "I. Yeah. Austin. Maybe I'll go down there one day. Show her I grew up good." He smiled again and squeezed Jared's hand tightly. "Show off Jared," he added.

"I'd like that." Jared smiled over at him, already thinking of how much he'd like to make that happen for Jensen sometime.

"How long has it been?" Sandy asked quietly, her curiosity too much for her to stand.

Katie laughed softly and shook her head, running a hand along Sandy's shoulder. "Forgive my girl, she likes to know everything about everyone, it's her nature."

Laughing quietly Jensen picked up a fork full of salad. "Well, the big epic blow-up was when I was seventeen so nine years. Wow. Never did the math before. What about you Katie - are things okay now?" Jensen shoved some of the salad in his mouth hoping to just shut himself up.

"No. I haven't spoken to them since I left home for college. But you make do, find a new kind of family." Katie smiled over at Sandy then at Jared. "These two, the crazy bunch, they make things better."

"I'm not crazy, just a little... spunky." Sandy laughed and pushed Katie's shoulder.

When both girls looked at Jared, who was helping himself to big mouthfuls of salad, he glanced up and shrugged. "I might be a little crazy." They all laughed at that and Jared grinned, pleased to lighten the air a little. He wasn't sure yet how to process this new bit of information about Jensen. It was like little pieces of the puzzle coming together and he wondered what else there was left to learn about the man.


	4. Chapter 4

Pulling up to the warehouse, Jared smiled softly as the sounds of waves greeted him. You could almost always hear them in the city, or maybe Jared always heard them because he'd always lived here, but they were louder at Jensen's place and it was soothing. Jared had lost count how many times he'd been there now, all blurring into moments together, shared kisses and touches and falling asleep listening to the ocean cresting and falling. Over a month of a glorious world and Jared - for the most part - was happier now than he'd ever been.

Jensen was mind blowing, even in his softest most unintentionally moments. He might smile or laugh softly or tuck Jared's hair behind his ear and Jared felt just like he was swooning.

Sandy and Katie teased him, insisting he was hopelessly in love with the man but Jared just blushed and shrugged it off. If he was feeling anything like love for Jensen, well, it was just too soon to say it. And Jared wasn't even going to try and take that step until some of the other parts in his life were a bit more sorted out. Because Jensen deserved a boyfriend who was honest with the rest of the world about who he was.

It had been weeks since Jensen waited for him at the bottom step. Now Jared headed in on his own, sliding the door of the freight elevator open and heading up to Jensen's place. Jared loved it, the open feel, the way every inch had little touches of the man seemingly just by happenstance. It was everything Jared's place wasn't and sometimes he thought he might just stay here, never leave, start over with this new life and enjoy every moment of it with Jensen.

"Hey," Jared called as he slid the door open, eyes landing on Jensen and grinning. "Jensen Ackles, where have you been all my life?" He laughed as he crossed the open concrete place quickly, sliding his bag off his shoulders and letting it drop by Jensen's art table.

Chuckling softly Jensen spun on his stool and slid his arm around his boyfriend's waist. "Check it out, finishing touches on my chest piece. Kane offered some suggestions but I think we might be done." He traced his finger over the waves. "See here? It's going to swoop right under my nipple - gonna fuckin' hurt."

Wetting his lips, Jared tried to imagine what the tattoo would look like on Jensen's skin. He couldn't adequately picture it but he was sure it would be awesome. Reaching out, Jared traced his fingers over the design and grinned. "That's gonna be hot. I'll be there, make sure you're not hurting too bad." Grinning, Jared ducked down and slid his lips over Jensen's skin. Heat had been building up in him from the moment he got out of class and called Jensen up to see if he could come over. Jared couldn't help it; the man was more addicting then anything imaginable.

"Can you stay the night?" Jensen turned into Jared's shoulder and hooked a leg around one of Jared's. " _All_ night. Don’t go home, don't sneak away, stay." His palm slid effortless down over the small of Jared's back and tucked just under the waistband of his jeans.

"Yeah?" Jared's eyes widened slightly and he shifted back into Jensen's touch, heart flipping in his chest. "Yeah. I'd uh, really like that." His fingers slid over the thin fabric of Jensen's shirt, down to the even thinner cotton boxers. "Got any special plans in mind?" He murmured, voice deepening with arousal.

"Might have a couple of ideas." Jensen just wanted to touch Jared. Sometimes, the hours in between their meetings, days even seemed like they'd go on forever and he wished that somehow they could just disappear into their own world and stay together. "You eat already?"

"I had a sandwich awhile ago." Jared mumbled and slid his hand under Jensen's shirt, pressing up along his chest. "You eat? Or we doing a food thing?" He nuzzled into Jensen's neck, sucking softly along his skin. He _loved_ how Jensen tasted.

Humming quietly, Jensen shifted a little. "Not if you keep doing that. Check out the counter," he teased. A trip to a dreaded department store then three grocery stores and a bookstore (because he didn't know what he was doing) had resulted in a chocolate fondue that was now on the kitchen counter next to a plate of strawberries, melon, orange slices and cherries.

"Hungry for some chocolate?" Jensen kissed Jared's temple.

"Wow. That looks delicious." Jared grinned and tugged Jensen over to the counter to inspect the fruit, grin stretching wider and wider. "We gonna feed each other?" He bumped his hip against Jensen's, stroking a hand down his back. Jensen was the most thoughtful person sometimes, Jared found himself wondering how he even existed.

"I think you should feed me, and I should watch you eat. You, oh boyfriend of mine, have the most amazing mouth." Jensen could watch Jared's lips, his mouth, for hours. There might even be sketches of it in the back of his new sketchbook but he wouldn't admit to it willingly. "I'm willing to bet that _you_ can make eating a chocolate covered cherry look about as hot as that can be."

Warmth sparked up in Jared and he picked a cherry from the platter. "I like you calling me boyfriend." He admitted quietly, swirling the cherry through the melted chocolate. Eyes locking with Jensen's, Jared brought the fruit up and parted his lips, holding the fruit so chocolate dripped along his lips. He could see Jensen's eyes darken as his tongue flicked out over the fruit and pulled it forward, sucking it off the stem, moan falling from his lips. "Tasty." He grinned innocently as possible at Jensen as his tongue slid over the chocolate on his lips.

"Again," Jensen growled, "slower." He could barely swallow because _Jesus_ how did someone like Jared exist? Really.

There was something incredibly hot about knowing you could turn someone like Jensen on so very much. He picked another cherry off the platter and took his time swirling it through the chocolate. This time he let the fruit dangle over Jensen lips for a moment, dropping chocolate across the plump surface before bringing it to his own lips. Jared kept his eyes are the darkening emerald as he smeared the sauce along his lips then finally pulled the fruit free, chasing after the taste on his lips, pulling the pit out of his mouth with his fingers.

Swaying forward Jared let the tip of his tongue glide over the chocolate staining Jensen's lips, sugar sweet mixed with Jensen's darker taste and Jared moaned, plunging his tongue forward into Jensen's mouth to share the taste.

Jensen's lashes fluttered closed as his mouth was suddenly _fucking_ full of Jared's tongue and chocolate and that taste he knew of only as his lover's mouth. It was seriously on the right side of absolutely sinful the way Jared's tongue spread the sweetness around Jensen's mouth.

Sucking on his boyfriend's tongue, Jensen moaned low and long and felt it vibrate its way up through his chest. "God," he murmured against Jared's lips when the man retreated to suck in some air. "Gotta. I want-" he groaned and slid closer on the stool, hands slipping under Jared's shirt and rubbing over the _just_ bare hips.

"What do you want?" Jared asked, voice deep and thick as he stepped back to pull off his own shirt, reaching out for Jensen's a moment later. When the man was just left in his boxers, Jared moved before Jensen could react. Snagging a strawberry from the platter he dunked it liberally in chocolate and let the warm sauce drizzling over Jensen's collar bone, sliding it up his neck before bringing the fruit to his mouth and taking a slow bite, lips clamping over the fruit and dragging down.

Bringing the rest to Jensen's lips, he waited until he felt the tug of Jensen's teeth biting in then dipped down, licking a broad stripe up through the chocolate coating Jensen's skin, moaning at the combination of tastes filling his mouth.

"Fuckin' Christ," Jensen grumbled when he managed to swallow what was in his mouth. Jared was trying to kill him. The sensation of the hot chocolate, the slight burn then the soothing linger of Jared's mouth nearly pushed Jensen too far. "I want to fuck you," he managed to groan out. "This. You and chocolate, then shower. Wanna take all of you, everything."

Snatching up a handful of Jared's hair Jensen tugged him roughly back up to his mouth. It was all sticky and sweet, strawberries and cherries, sliding and sticking and Jensen was just about ready for his heart to stop. "Say yes. Tell me I can fuck you."

Jared's knees dipped, arm curling around Jensen's middle to keep himself upright. "Fuck yes. God, I've been waiting." He inhaled shakily and slid his free hand down, palming Jensen's hard cock through his boxers. "Wanna feel you in me, so full. _Jesus_." Jared could come just thinking about Jensen fucking him. He'd never wanted someone so badly and he crushed his lips to Jensen's once more, shifting as close to his body as he could.

Jensen lost track of time. Time just disappeared out of their world. There was chocolate, the swirl of heat that Jared teased to life inside of Jensen. Insane would be one of the words that Jensen would use to describe the way their bodies moved together. They couldn't stop. Everything was flesh and taste, the warm slick feel of the chocolate then the cooling and the explosion of sweetness each time Jared's tongue lapped at Jensen's chest and then slid straight into his mouth.

Dipping his fingers in the chocolate Jensen let Jared suck them almost clean and nearly fell off the stool when his spine felt like it just melted right out of his body. Their words filled up the room; names murmured, moans, the gentle smack of lips and the whoosh of breath then Jensen couldn't take it anymore.

Launching himself off the stool he grabbed Jared by his jeans and pulled him away from the counter and toward the shower so he could slam him up against the glass door. Thigh pressed hard against Jared's crotch he leaned in to hiss. "Get our clothes off and start the shower. You're gonna suck me so hard I come then we'll start all over again."

"Fuck," Jared sucked in a shaky breath and nearly slid down the glass wall when Jensen stepped away. His hands were shaking slightly as he brought them to his waistline, still tasting chocolate and Jensen's skin when he swallowed. It was a welcome relief on his straining cock when he finally managed to kick his pants and boxers off, turning to slide into the glass stalls. Jared turned the temperature up warmer than he might normally, steam almost instantly filling the glass room. He stepped under the water and let it soak over his hair and down his body, resisting touching his cock no matter how bad he might want it.

"Jen?" Jared stepped across the shower, peering out the door for his boyfriend. He couldn't wait to get his lips around Jensen's cock, couldn't wait for it to fill his mouth thick and burning.

Jensen stepped into the shower and pushed as close to Jared as he could. Heat flooded him when Jared just moaned and stumbled backwards, hands clawing down Jensen's chest and catching one of his barbells. Falling forward Jensen slammed his hands into the glass wall under the spray and thrust his hips against Jared's.

He could feel Jared's rock-hard cock pressing into the tender part of his hip and Jensen moaned. "God you want it, don't you?" His lips moved over Jared's mouth, biting and tugging on his bottom lip.

"So fucking bad Jensen," Jared moaned into the kiss, pushing forward to deepen it. His fingers slid down Jensen's sides, caressing smooth and silky skin, rocking forward for any form of friction over the low, dull ache in his body.

"Wanna suck your cock, wanna make you come." Jared panted the words into Jensen's mouth, sliding his lips down to suck along Jensen's skin, knees weakening enough to make his body sink slightly. "Let me Jensen, please. I want it." A shudder shook through Jared with the words, and it was almost frightening how very much he wanted Jensen fucking into his mouth.

Hissing quietly Jensen arched his body back so he could let the water run down over his face. If he lasted more than a few minutes of this slick-wet torture it would be a miracle. Shoving at Jared's shoulder he pushed the man down and shifted his weight to his back foot. "Suck it all down, Jared." Slipping his fingers around the base of his cock he ran the head back and forth over Jared's wet lips and moaned.

Tongue flicking out, Jared let Jensen drag the head along the surface, dipping to push against the slit and gather pre-come. Hands fumbling up, Jared clutched along the back of Jensen's thighs and squeezed as he caught the head of Jensen's cock and sucked hard. When Jensen's body thrust up against his Jared sank down, hollowing his cheeks so his lover could feel the pressure with each inch he moved down. The downy hair along the base brushed against his nose, filling his senses with musk as he inhaled through his nose and the back of throat rippled with the touch of Jensen's cock. Something close to a growl rumbled around the flesh in his mouth as Jared slid back and sucked back down, Jensen's cock a heavy heat filling his mouth in the best possible way.

No warning - Jensen just thrust forward. As soon as he was sure Jared had eased himself to taking the full length of Jensen's cock he just snapped his hips back then forward. The moan that wrapped road his cock vibrated so hard Jensen felt like his flesh was on fire. His hand tangled through Jared's wet locks, brushing, soothing, and then cupping the back of his skull to hold him there. _Not that Jared every pulled away_.

There was something so wanton and amazing about Jared and yet, that look in his eyes was like something so much bigger. It meant _Just you, just Jensen_. And even as Jensen's hips rocked back and slid forward to return his cock into that perfect slick ring of lips emotions welled in his chest. "Jared," he murmured.

This was the kind of think that haunted Jared, fueled all the deep dark desires in him. Jensen fucked into his mouth because he liked it so much and he _knew_ Jared did as well. Each slide to the back of his throat had another moan humming through him, each pull back had Jared almost forcing himself down immediately because he mourned the loss of heat and _full_ the instant it was gone. Jared's hands slid up Jensen's ass, squeezed at the muscle then back down, fingers cupping and rolling along Jensen's heavy and swollen balls. Jared wanted Jensen to come in his mouth, to add that taste to the remnants of sticky fruit and sugary chocolate.

Jensen gave in to the feeling, the slide of Jared's greedy mouth. His fingers drifted over Jared's hollowed cheeks and he gazed down, watching the fluttering lashes. Jared was gorgeous like this, wet hair slick and stuck to his face, eyes closed against the water, red lust-flush running the length of his neck.

Moaning, Jensen thrust forward again feeling his balls tighten, ache and pull up close to his body. Jared's huge hand was there, cupping the soft flesh and urging him. _Wanting it._ Another load moan and Jensen's body shuddered forward, his cock jamming hard into Jared's inviting mouth. Jensen slid both hands through Jared's hair and leaned back to let go of the moan of Jared's name that nearly chocked him as he came.

Come sprayed hot and thick along the back of Jared's throat and his body twitched forward, almost coming from that alone, hips snapping up slightly, Jared let his mouth pull back. He liked the thick taste on his tongue, the way it lingered thereafter. He sucked and pulled at Jensen, continuing the gentle roll along his balls until his lover grew soft in his mouth. It was _almost_ a whimper that left Jared's lips as he pulled back, sitting on his heels and staring up at Jensen, panting heavily. Water sprayed over him and Jared tipped into it, letting the heat soak his hair once more, drip down his face and chest and lower.

Jensen's heart was pounding so loud he could hear it over the shooshing water. Staring down he smoothed his fingers over Jared's cheek. "You're so _fucking_ beautiful," he murmured. There'd never been another word that worked for Jared; his smooth skin and lust-darkened eyes. With his head tipped back into the spray of water he was all smooth lines and curved muscle and Jensen felt like his boyfriend was a walking work of art.

When he finally recovered his senses a little he bent down and slipped his arms under Jared's. "Come on," he soothed. He could see how close Jared was, the way the man's hips rolled unconsciously and the small hiss that left the man's lips when his body brushed up against Jensen's. One arm firmly around Jared's waist, Jensen reached out with the other and turned off the water.

The barely there drip as the water stopped was the only sound for a few moments and then the soft panting of Jared's breath against his ear was there and Jensen moved. Pushing the door open he led Jared out and then pulled him toward the bed. He didn't care about towels, loved the feel of Jared wet, the bed would dry -and _fuck_ they probably wouldn't care anyway.

Sinking down onto the bed Jensen tugged Jared down beside him and found his mouth again.

Whimpering into the kiss, Jared rutted forward, desperate for more, desperate for some _release_. Against his own, Jensen's body was warm - radiating heat - still slick and smooth and Jared couldn't stop his hips from gliding against Jensen's thigh. His cock rolled along the heated skin and Jared moaned, wrenching his lips back from Jensen's to suck in a hard, deep breath. "Please Jensen," he gasped, eyes fluttering open to peer at his lover. "Need, _god_." Jared felt like everything in him was spiraling out of control, just out of his reach, and Jared was going to literally go insane, fall apart at one touch from Jensen.

"God, when you're like this it makes me crazy." Jensen's lips brushed softly over Jared's and he rolled away for a few moments then rolled back and moaned when his body pressed back up against Jared's. "Gonna mark you." He held up the pen when he felt Jared's body tense momentarily, "Just want you to feel it - the way i would draw on you. You're so perfect the way you are, but _God_ it's the touch. That's why I do what I do- touch and you." Jensen's voice was thick with emotion.

"Wha-what you gonna draw?" Jared panted heavily, slumping back onto the bed. A pen wasn't the big of a deal, not like Jared really cared about _anything_ Jensen wanted to do to him at that moment, he'd jump on board with anything Jensen suggested because _fuck_ he wanted the man. He wiped water from his brow, rubbed along his eyes and wet his lip, trying to make Jensen's image cease blurring at the edges.

"My tattoo, the one I'll wear when you suck me." Jensen had thought of so little else when he was drawing. He wiped a hand over Jared's skin to clear away some of the excess water and then the tip of the marker was dragging over his chest. Swoops of lines and curls, the waves growing under Jensen's hand. His other hand slipped down to curl around Jared's shaft, thick, long and hotter than hell in his grasp.

"One day, you'll let me tattoo you, something small, the pain won't be much but you'll be mine. I'll see it when you're stretched out like this." He pulled back slightly when Jared's body bowed up off the bed like he was just picked up around his middle. "Fuck," Jensen whispered. Shoving at Jared's chest he drew again, watching the man's nipples harden as the marker whipped around each nub of flesh.

It was surprisingly erotic, the gentle trace of the marker along his skin, Jensen's words flowing honey silk over his senses. Everything was overloading in his mind, Jensen's hand, how deep and rumbling his words were, and oddly enough even the idea of Jensen permanently marking him, claiming him as his _always_. "Yes. God yes Jensen," he gasped, not quite sure what he was saying yes too. As Jensen's hand continued to move, the tip of the pen a constant sweeping motion along his skin, Jared could feel his orgasm curling up in him, sending his body bowing off the bed once more. "Want- want you to mark me." He met Jensen's gaze for a long moment then his boyfriend's hand tightened and Jared's head fell back.

Hips snapping up into Jensen's touch, Jared shuddered and his orgasm exploded through him, blinding white light flashing along his eyes. He felt the splash of his release along his skin and it tore a louder moan of Jensen's name from his lips, every part of him tensing as his release crested.

Tossing the marker aside Jensen slid down Jared's body and lapped at the hot streaks of come on Jared's body. With each sweep of his tongue he felt Jared's muscles ripple and twitch beneath him. The salty bitterness of Jared's come spread in Jensen's mouth, his throat as he licked his lover clean. "Gonna do that one day," he murmured as his tongue flicked over the head of Jared's still half-hard cock. "Gonna tattoo you and make you come." Lips still moving over his lover's flesh Jensen kissed his way back up the man's body, over his heaving chest as he tried to suck in air.

When their lips slid together again Jensen rolled over Jared, hips circling slightly over the man. "I’m hard again already," he murmured. Lowering himself down he pressed his cock hard against Jared's hip. "It's you, never enough," he whispered against Jared's mouth. Crushing their mouths together, Jensen moaned and thrust his tongue forward into the heat of Jared's soft mouth.

Still tingling from his release, Jared allowed Jensen to kiss him, parting his lips so Jensen's tongue could map every inch of him. His mind was spinning with the idea alone, the thought of Jensen tattooing him had never exactly been hot but now Jared felt like he was looking forward to it. "Gonna fuck me?" He murmured into Jensen's mouth and his body twitched, heat soaking through him all over again. After this he was probably going to sleep a week but _fuck_ if it wasn't worth it.

"I am." Jensen slid off Jared's body and shoved at the man's shoulder until he turned away from him. He'd planned this, fuck, Jensen had thought about it from the first day they'd been together - just waiting. Waiting for that trust to be right.

He'd stashed the lube under the pillow earlier, feeling a bit like a teenager. Now he was just glad it was _right there_. Slicking his fingers quickly he pushed Jared's hair out of the way so he could suck the water droplets from the back of his neck. "You okay?"

"Perfect." Jared murmured and it had never been more true. Excitement was pumping in his veins in steady pulses, a thick heavy energy crackling between them, leaving him wondering if he hadn't just imagined this whole, incredible moment. Only Jensen's soothing touches were pulling him back from those thoughts and Jared smiled at him, thinking the gesture likely oddly sweet considering the lust charged moment they were in. "Want you in me," he whispered, wetting his lips.

Jensen nuzzled hard into the back of Jared's neck and pressed his fingers forward to seek out the tight entrance. "You gonna get hard for me again?" Jensen's lips moved tirelessly against the back of Jared's neck, along his broad back, nipping and tasting his flesh. "Wanna make you come just by fucking you." Thrusting a finger forward Jensen hissed as the silken heat of Jared's ass clenched tight around it.

A sharp spark of pain flared through Jared but knowing it was Jensen's finger, knowing what was to come, it shifted to pleasure almost instantly. "Y-yes," he gasped, noise wet and low, torn out from him as his body almost instantly fucked back into Jensen's touch. This was what he'd wanted, for so very long, and each roll of his hips back rippled up his spine in resounding waves of desire. "More," he grunted, not caring if it made him sound needy and a little insane, Jared _knew_ Jensen was going to fuck him hard enough to feel it for days afterward and he could hardly stand waiting.

It went so fast, two fingers, three, and Jensen could feel the way Jared's body took him in. The moans that came out of Jared's mouth were the best thing Jensen had ever heard. Jensen could feel Jared clenching tight around his fingers, could feel the man's breath as he panted for air. Jared pushed back against Jensen's fingers when he withdrew them and held them tight when Jensen fucked into him. It was insanely perfectly.

As soon as Jared writhed too hard, twisting harshly back for more, Jensen pulled himself free and slicked up his cock. _That_ was the moment right then he realized his hand was gliding over flesh and not latex. "Shit, Jared, condom?" Not wanting to lose a moment of the heat between them he licked and kissed his way down the knobs of Jared's spine to the broad muscle on his back. "M'clean, haven't been with - Jesus - no one this way since Derek." The words were a tumble and Jensen had no idea if Jared even knew what he was talking about.

"Who?" Jared managed to mumble, forcing through the haze of his mind. Shoving the thought away, Jared shook his head and rolled his ass back, pushing up to his elbows, head hanging between his arms. "Just you. No- just, fucking _fuck_ me Jensen god." He groaned low in his throat, so blown by lust it was maddening. He didn't want any barriers between them; he trusted Jensen. The idea of Jensen's cock thick and full splitting him open was too amazing to not grab hold of.

Jensen's hand was already back on his cock, sliding the lube along the length of it. "Okay, _God_ Jared, wanted this for so long." His words trailed away as he gripped his cock at the base and slid it forward, the heat of Jared's ass _barely_ there, and then everywhere. Moaning, Jensen's hips rolled gently forwards. Inch by fucking amazing inch he sank into the silken heat of Jared's ass. The man's spine twisted back against Jensen's chest and he had no choice but to slide his arms around Jared and hold him close.

"Love this," Jensen murmured as he trembled with the strain of remaining still for a few moments, giving Jared some time to adjust, "love you," he breathed. His heart clenched as the words passed his lips but it was true. Since the moment Jared had walked into his life things had started to change for Jensen. He held back less, smiled more, lived. His hips rocked into Jared's body and he moaned.

The words slammed so hard into Jared's mind his hips were snapping back against his lover's and Jensen was all the way in him. "You-" He sucked in a harsh breath, closing his eyes and rolling his hips back against the burn and stretch and _oh-so-perfect_. "Jensen," Jared wanted to say it back, if he could catch his breath enough to get more words out. Jensen might have said something about Jared not needing to return it but he _did_ need to because it was so very true.

Rocking his body forward, Jared moaned low in his throat as Jensen slid out of him then snapped forward, fucking hard into him. Fingers dug into his skin and Jared hissed, panted, closed his eyes and met Jensen's next thrust forward with a hard push back. "Love you," he managed to get the words out, knowing they sounded strangled, feeling the sharp tingle of emotion carried with them, causing his heart to flip in his chest.

Jensen's arm moved across Jared's chest and grasped his opposite shoulder to pull him back so he could fuck into him. Just like he'd imagined Jared was amazing. He shifted his hips, writhed back, his body a wave of motion as he trembled and shuddered with pleasure. Sliding down slightly Jensen slid a hand to Jared's hip to angle in and tap that _right_ spot within Jared; tease out that part of him that Jensen had never seen - where he just came apart.

The sharp flash of mind numbing pleasure that washed down over Jared was almost enough to have him coming right there. Jensen slammed hard into his prostate and Jared's body twisted and writhed, moving both away and into the touch. Somehow Jensen managed to keep him still so every single thrust forward drove into the sensitive bundle of nerves over and over. "J-Jen," he moaned, head rolling on his shoulders, muscles tensing and sliding back, curving up, anything for _more_. " _Fuck_."

Fucking into Jared was addictive; Jensen's entire body was slick with sweat, shower-damp hair still plastered to his forehead along with Jared's. Each thrust into the heat of Jared's body was so much pleasure Jensen could barely stand it. He could feel the release clawing at him, fighting to happen and just gave up.

Hips snapping forward he moaned and bit down on Jared's shoulder knowing he was marking the skin, bruising the creamy sweet flesh of his lover. Yanking on Jared's hair he was desperate to press his mouth to his lover's and somehow Jared's managed to twist back to kiss him. The instant their lips touch Jensen felt like his body was turned inside out. Shuddering, hips slamming erratically forward he came. His aching cock pulsed hard and painful then it was all pleasure. Pleasure and the sweetest fucking heat and swell of release he had ever felt. His cock was slick with his own come, still easing in and out, and pushing Jared over the edge.

For a moment Jared thought he might have blacked out. When he came around his lips were just barely gliding over Jensen's and his body felt spent, worn, and tingling. "God," he whispered and slowly sank down onto the mattress, turning bleary eyes to his lover. "You're, the most perfect," Jared laughed throatily and didn't attempt to move, limps feeling weak and loose. Jared reached out for him, hand dropping limply a moment later, soft laugh echoing through him.

Wrapping his arms tight around his lover, Jensen pulled him close. Tucking Jared's head under his chin he smiled and kissed his forehead. "I meant it," he murmured.

"Me too." Jared breathed, smiling when he didn't even have to ask what Jensen was referring too. When it was quiet for a few minutes, Jared thought they'd both drift off but something nagged at Jared's mind and he pressed his lips to Jensen's skin, murmuring softly. "Who's Derek?"

Jumping slightly Jensen groaned and tightened his hold on Jared. "Last partner... sorry for blurting it like that." Now that Jensen was almost in control of his wits he couldn’t believe he'd chosen that particular moment to bring up his ex.

Chuckling softly, Jared stroked his fingers along Jensen's skin. "Must have... been pretty serious. If you could think of him before..." He worried the moment the words were out that it made him sound a little jealous or something, that was _ridiculous_ , so he coughed and shook his head. "You don't have to talk about him if you don't want too."

"I wasn't thinking _about_ him. It was more like - realizing I hadn't wanted anyone as much as I wanted you." Jensen frowned and kissed Jared's temple.

Sighing, Jensen closed his eyes. "He hurt me. Worse than anything ever had. Lied to me about who he was and, well, I found out and it all unraveled. He'd been in jail and stolen someone's identity and yeah ... I'm a stupid fuck." He still found it hard to talk about, hard to admit to someone without feeling the absolute shame of someone who got so drawn in. "I got pretty messed up."

The jail thing finally made sense, so that was something, but Jared felt the slightest nagging at something more and closed his eyes, telling himself he wasn't like that. "How messed up?" Jared asked quietly, continuing his soothing strokes along Jensen's skin. He couldn't imagine Jensen any different than this joyful, amazingly talented man and it pained him to think about it.

Jensen pressed his lips together. He didn't want to tell Jared this, make the man think less of him somehow, too weak to keep himself together. "I- God, Jared." It felt like his chest was cinching tighter. Saying it out loud made it seem _too_ real. "Damn messed up. I ... hurt myself and there was blood - and Christian had to try and put all the pieces back together. I drank a lot for a while, lost days, and lost friends. Christian stayed with me through it all." He sucked in a breath and kept his eyes closed. "That's the short version."

"Wow. I had no idea." Jared wrapped his arms tight around Jensen, lips pressing hard into his chest. He couldn't believe someone would hurt Jensen like that, and he was suddenly damn terrified of all the things about himself that Jensen didn't know. But it wasn't the same, having wealthy parents - Jensen already knew he did, maybe not to the extent of their celebrity but close - and there was the whole pretending to date Sandy thing but he'd stopped doing that. So really, it was just Jared being selfish and keeping Jensen bundled in that part of his life that didn't judge him at all for who his family was. "I'm glad you're better," he said after awhile, letting his leg slide between Jensen's.

Pulling back a little Jensen gazed down at Jared. "It doesn't change things?" He blinked a few times, eyes itching with emotion as he brushed Jared's hair back off his forehead and tucked it behind his ear.

"No. Why would it?" Jared smiled softly up at his boyfriend and shifted closer, brushing their lips together. "People have situations, things happen, their life changes and they keep going. Obviously you're not who you were then, you've gotten better." Jared couldn't even think of something like that affecting how he saw Jensen, it was just another piece to the puzzle.

Smiling slightly, Jensen pressed a kiss to the end of Jared's nose. He liked the way it turned up slightly. He liked that he noticed that it turned up slightly. "Can I keep you?"

"Mm. I think that's the plan." Jared chuckled quietly and curled against Jensen once more. "Let's sleep, then we can wake up and I can ride you." He grinned against Jensen's skin and shoved away any lingering doubts he had about his choice to keep some details about his life to himself.

Jensen wouldn't admit it later but the sound that left his mouth bore a striking resemblance to a whimper.

-=-=-=-

Jared had purposefully avoided scrubbing his chest - and skipped one day of a shower - just so the drawing would still linger on his chest. The school week was going to be busy and it wouldn't be likely that he'd get to see Jensen before the weekend. So now he stood in front of his mirror, head tilting from one side to the other as he took in the faded lines and thought about two and half days ago, when he'd still been completely tangled up in everything Jensen.

Really, Jared should just quit the rest of his life and spend all his time as Jensen's willing sex slave. That sounded amazing.

"What the hell is that?" Sandy leaned against the bathroom door frame, eyebrows lifting.

Flush coloring his cheeks, Jared turned to Sandy and hurriedly tugged on his shirt. "It's just, a drawing. Jensen's getting it done, as a tattoo and he uh, wanted to... practice it on me?"

"That's... there's something kinky about that isn't there?" Sandy blinked at him and laughed, shaking her head and stepping further back into his bedroom.

"I am very vanilla," Jared said with a wide grin then stopped, looking at Katie who was standing by the door and fiddling with her necklace. It wasn't like either of them hadn't been in his room before but Jared knew them well enough to pick up on the vibes. "What's going on?"

"We wanted to talk to you about Jensen." Katie said quietly and shifted, arms tucking over her chest. "You've been walking around singing really badly the past couple of days so we kind of assumed he finally fucked you."

Jared's eyebrows widened and he looked between them. "I think, maybe you two know me a little too well."

"Look Jared, it's not just about that, it's, there's a couple of other things we need to discuss so, can we now?" Sandy smiled softly at him, reaching out to rub his arm softly.

Jared had a very bad, very tense feeling in his stomach and it seemed pretty unlikely he was going to like anything they had to say. "Uh, sure. Did I do something? Am I being grounded?" He was trying to lighten the mood and both girls smiled but it was brief.

"Alright, well. What do you want to do first? The Jensen stuff or the other stuff?" Katie had led the way down the stairs to the first floor and her and Sandy were sitting side by side on the couch, leaving Jared to take the love seat so he could see them properly.

Really, Jared wasn't sure he wanted to discuss either of them. "The, um, the Jensen stuff?"

"Okay well that's easy. It breaks down into simplistic realities. One, Jared, your entire family and most of your friends think you like girls and yet you're madly in love with a guy. There's something obviously fucked up about that." Sandy, who was always better at laying it out there, eyed Jared. "And also? The guy you're madly in love with thinks you're just some average dude. Which is absolutely _stupid_ because I know you hate sometimes how you're different but Jensen's not going to care so why you don't tell him that your dad pretty much owns half this town and you're on a first name basis with ten percent of Hollywood is beyond me."

"I am not." Jared defended weakly, knowing Sandy was right, knowing he was being stupid and putting it off only because it just didn't seem to be _important_. "The first name thing. I've met like, two celebrities and they were the Olson twins so seriously, it doesn't count." Jared huffed. That wasn't very true either, last time Jared had spent a week at Jeff's place he met Julia Roberts but she freaked him out enough Jared preferred not to talk about it. "And I'll come out to my family; I already told them we broke up didn't I?"

"It's not enough Jared. You need to tell them. Before it's too late. You need to sit both of them down and tell them how you're in love with an amazing guy. If something happens, _god_ Jared you know we'll be there for you. But they love you, and they'll want to know the truth. You owe them that, and yourself that. Think how much better you'll feel when you don't see that look on Jensen's face when you can't hold hands in public." Katie inhaled deeply as she finished her words and Jared sighed.

"I know. You're right. Soon. Really soon. I'll call them tomorrow and see when they'll both be around." Jared said quietly, folding his hands in his lap. He knew it wouldn't be for at least a week - his mom was in France for some cooking thing - so it would give him time to work up the courage. He thought about asking Jensen to come along but well, he didn't want to put him through that. But he'd maybe mention telling them before it happened. "What's the other thing?" Jared mumbled, feeling frankly pretty worn from the Jensen topic and not ready for much more.

Katie and Sandy exchanged a look, shared a smile, then Sandy looked back and grinned at Jared. It took him a moment to realize she was holding up her hand. On which sat a sparkly ring that just _screamed_ Sandy.

"Is that- are you two?" Jared looked between them and when they laughed and nodded he pushed forward, throwing his arms around them in a tight hug. Of _course_ he was happy for his girls, they deserved to be happy and together. "This is so great! I'm so happy for you two!"

"Thank you." Sandy laughed and patted his head as he dropped back, still beaming.

Jared's smile dimmed slightly as the girl's exchange another, more uncertain look. "What? You're not pregnant are you?" He snorted, lips twitching slightly.

Sandy slid a hand through her hair and sighed. "Well, it's good you know, that you've told people you and I broke up. Only, I still live here. And people seem to not believe me when I say we broke up. So, I, we, Katie and I want to move out. I mean, we're going to. Soon, like, pretty much right away and I'm so sorry Jared I know it's horrible of us but we're _engaged_ and people don't even know we're a couple and I can't spend my life pretending anymore."

"Wow." Jared stared at them with wide eyes, mind instantly trying to imagine what it would be like, this huge house without Sandy and Katie. "So, in a couple of weeks or something?" He forced a smile on his lips, forced himself to be supportive for them.

"Actually." Katie frowned, threading her fingers through Sandy's. "We, kind of found a place a couple of weeks ago. You were just so _happy_ we didn't want to bring you down. But, yeah. We're pretty much set to go immediately. So. We're having Sandy's parents over, for dinner."

"What? Tonight? Like, like you're leaving right now? But-" Jared thought this was all too much, too fast, not enough time to prepare his mind for the idea of being alone.

And it just kept going like that, they were hugging and laughing and crying and moving around and suddenly, within an hour, Jared was standing alone. In some giant house, and he had absolutely no idea what had just happened. Snatching up his phone, he called Jensen - even if he had to be up at the crack of dawn and Jensen said he was working long hours this week - and held his breath, praying he'd answer.

Rolling over then half dragging himself to the nightstand Jensen smacked at his phone and finally managed to get it in his hand. "'lo," he muttered.

"Were you sleeping?" Jared said quietly, leaning against the closed front door. He had no idea what time it was, but it couldn't be too late he thought. "Sorry."

"No. Yeah, doesn't matter. Just tired, napping, Jay you okay?" Jensen cracked an eye open and looked at the clock. He hadn't meant to sleep for long , just wanted to close his eyes for a few minutes.

"I, no. Not really. I mean, I am. I'm happy for them. But just, it all happened really fast and I feel like I did something to make them do this and I don't understand because I know I'm not perfect but I kind of thought I was their third musketeer you know?" Jared sucked in a quick breath, realizing that had to make little to no sense for Jensen. "Katie and Sandy just moved out. And they got engaged. Which is good."

"Engaged? Jesus - Jared that's awesome. I mean, wait - they moved out? You didn't mention they were getting a place." Jensen was still kind of trying to understand what had happened and half wondered if he had missed something in there.

"Yeah. I didn't know. They just kind of, told me everything an hour ago and gathered up the rest of their stuff and left." Jared blinked and wondered vaguely if it was a girl thing. "Do you think I did something? I know I've been really busy lately but I was trying to give them some time since Sandy and I- uh, since, you know, they were getting more serious and stuff." Jared flinched at the lie and closed his eyes, sinking down along the door in a defeated heap. "I thought I was being a good musketeer."

"You'll still be their musketeer." Jensen rolled over to what he now considered Jared's side of the bed. "You're my very favorite musketeer. Maybe it was just time Jare? Has something happened with you and Sandy?"

"Um." Jared frowned and struggled between the two feelings in him. One, lying to Jensen was the most awful thing in the world and he hated it. But, if Jensen got upset with him, then Jared really _would_ be alone right now and he didn't think he was quite brave enough for that. "I guess. I think, it's hard for them to feel like a couple with me around. People always assume, something else is happening. So, they just wanted to be them. Guess I just gotta be happy for them. Sorry, I should let you sleep. Works busy huh?" It felt good to at least hear Jensen's voice, Jared wished he had it taped so he could play it over and over around his house for hours.

"Mmhmm, my hand is killing me, and my back. Come sleep here." He loved waking up with Jared curled up against him. For a guy who was over six foot four Jared did a remarkable job of curling up and fitting his entire body against or _on_ Jensen. Jensen grinned. "Did you notice the key I put on your key ring?"

"You did? I didn't even notice. Been a busy week. But yeah, I'll come over there." Jared couldn't imagine spending the night alone in the house yet anyway. "Hey, if I, could I bring some stuff over? And maybe stay there and spend a few days there?" He asked hopefully, pushing up from the floor and heading for the stairs.

Jensen chuckled. "Give you a key and you move in," he teased. "Jay you know you're welcome here whenever you want. Bring a toothbrush, stay a while." Jensen stretched. "I'll be in bed."

"I'll wake you up with my mouth." Jared grinned and bounded up the stairs. He had a lot of stuff to think about, but he'd get around to it. For now though, he wanted his boyfriend. "See you soon. Love you." Jared laughed happily, relieved to have something to look forward too.

Shaking his head Jensen grinned and tossed his phone aside. His boyfriend, he decided, was a nut. A completely adorable nut, but a nut none-the-less.

It took less than a half hour for Jared to get to Jensen's warehouse, which was altogether impressive but mainly because he didn't get a speeding ticket. He grinned up at the building and headed inside, feeling better once he'd slid the key into the door. Jensen must have been really tired, he slept through the elevator and the door sliding open and closed. It was so much easier to just climb out of his clothes and not think about all the things the girl's had said. Jared knew it wasn't the best idea but still, he'd get there. Soon. One day.

Jensen was spread out on his stomach and Jared carefully straddled his ass, working his hands slowly along the man's back, massaging in deep circles with the heels of his hands. Because he'd promised to wake Jensen with his mouth, he bent down and slid his lips, tongue, along Jensen's spine, letting his hardening cock run over Jensen's body. _Yeah_ , this was going to be much better than thinking or staying at home alone for the night.

"You better be my boyfriend," Jensen mumbled into his pillow. Maybe he'd been awake for a little while, pretty much since Jared touched him because there was really no way he could miss that. He loved the feel of Jared's weight on him, warm and heavy and the soft almost purr-like sound of him breathing.

"Nah, I'm that other hot guy who has a key to your place and is freakishly tall." Jared grinned and spread himself over Jensen, nuzzling into the back of his hair. "But you'll fuck me anyway right?" He chuckled as close to Jensen's ear as he could, licking along the lobe. Jared figured he had to be doing some things right in life, to have Jensen as his.

"Absolutely." Jensen flipped over and shoved Jared down.


	5. Chapter 5

"We _really_ doing this?" Christian grabbed his hair and flipped an elastic around it quickly.

"We are. You never put your hair back when you tattoo." Jensen dragged a razor over his chest slowly. Christian had offered to shave him but Jensen didn't want his friend anywhere near his nipples with a sharp object. That should seriously make him rethink the whole tattooing thing.

"Not gonna miss any of this, man." Christian laughed and started getting his station ready.

"Just make sure you get a good look at what you're tattooing every now and again. And don't forget-"

"Fuck! I know, I know. Don't touch Jared, he's yours, you're his - what-the-fuck-ever." But Christian was grinning.

Jensen kicked at Chris' ass. He knew his friend was happy for him and okay, Christian was probably going to be completely turned on seeing the entire event. But if Jensen knew his best friend, and he _did_ , Christian undoubtedly had something lined up for later in the evening.

"You done shavin'? Christ on a crutch you're taking a long time." Christian was holding the transfer in one hand and the spray bottle in the other and looking entirely too predatory for Jensen's liking.

"Could you try not to look _quite_ so excited?" Jensen rolled his shoulders nervously and stood in between Christian's legs. "Slap it on me."

Spritzing Jensen's chest, Christian laughed and Jensen slapped him across the top of his head. Pressing the transfer on and peeling it off shortly after Chris slapped Jensen's hip to send him over to the mirror.

Jensen liked it. The great thing was that the transfer looked almost exactly like the drawing he'd done on Jared's chest. Turning back to Christian he grinned. "Let's do this."

Jensen clambered up on Christian's table and grimaced when Christian buzzed the machine before hitting his flesh. The familiar scratching burn of the needle was a welcome sensation. Jensen had often told people that some people felt it like a cat scratch - some people compared getting a tattoo to childbirth. Jensen had never had a child but he was pretty sure that was an exaggeration.

The outline was the deepest part of a tattoo. Christian and Jensen had agreed that they'd do the outline first and then bring Jared into the equation. Truth be told, Jensen's body had been thrumming the entire day. Just thinking about it, thinking about Jared's mouth on him was more than enough to keep him half-hard and annoyingly happy for most of the day. Jared had dropped by at lunch time to pick up a key to the shop so they could lock in for the night and get the outline done. Jared would be there for the shading. _There_. Jensen shuddered.

"This is crazy." Christian has a shit-eating grin on his face as his worked his way down Jensen's chest. "And stop moving."

"Yeah, I know." Jensen's smile was almost shy, an endorphin flush already creeping across his cheeks. Crazy-good.

"Ya sure still?"

Jensen raised an eyebrow and gave Christian an exasperated look because seriously. He wasn't going to answer that.

"Okay, okay, I'm just checkin'."

For over two hours Christian's machine buzzed and Jensen lay as still as he could. The anticipation was making him a bit twitchier than he usually was when he got a tattoo so they took a couple of quick breaks. Jensen could feel the sweat running down his neck, because _sure_ , being tattooed for hours wasn't everyone's thing but this kind of pain was like a reward to Jensen. He'd never figured out how to explain it - it was maybe one of those things you had to go through to understand. They grunted a few words now and again, but both men were caught up in the art before long and time trudged on by.

Jensen's eyes were closed when he heard the shop door open and he smiled without opening his eyes.

Christian laughed quietly. "Shit son - you look like the cat that just swallowed the canary."

Blinking his eyes open Jensen joined his friend’s laughter. "How we doin'?" He tried to peer down at his chest without moving until Chris pulled the needle off and stopped the machine.   
"Good, apart from the way you twitched like a fuckin' dyin' cow while I was working around the nipple."

"Christian? That _fucking_ hurt- hey," Jensen's voice softened the instant he saw his boyfriend's face appear around the corner of Christian's door. " _You_ are a sight for sore eyes."

Jared was not second guessing his decision to do this by any means but _god_ he was nervous. He kept having this horrible moment in his mind where Jensen got too caught up in the moment, thrust up into his mouth and ended up with some weird ass tattoo on his chest that would forever mar what should be a perfect thing. Thankfully, he'd come with a few ideas - mainly holding Jensen's hips down - that would make sure things were good all around.

"Hey." He grinned and crossed to them, holding out a drink carrier. "Your requested beverages. Man, that looks amazing. Good job Christian." Jared smiled over at him before turning his gaze to Jensen. His face was flushed, eyes slightly dilated and Jared knew he'd said before that tattoos turned him on but he really hadn't been expecting it to be so clear on his features. "Are you uh, ready for me now?"

Christian rolled his eyes and tilted his chin at Jensen. "He's been wantin' you here all day. Never stops." Spinning on the stool he set about pulling some coloured ink and changing out the needles. "Gotta get ready, piss off for ten, talk, romance each other or whatever the hell you modern gays do these day."

Laughing, Jensen held out his hand for Jared to help him up. "He's just jealous," he whispered as he pulled himself off the table.

"Bet your ass I am. Have you _seen_ yourselves?"

Christian was still muttering as Jensen tugged Jared across the narrow hall to his tattoo room. "Wanna show you something."

"Okay." Jared nodded, still a little stunned by how _good_ the tattoo looked on Jensen's chest. He couldn't wait until it was completely healed and he could trace all the lines and curves with his tongue. Glancing up from Jensen's chest to his face, Jared grinned sheepishly. "What?"

Jensen held out the sketchbook Jared had given him. "I was thinkin' you know? About how you said you wouldn't mind a tattoo and I got to thinking about us and how we found each other 'cause of Sandy and how crazy that really is when you think about how many people there are in the world." He knew he was babbling a bit but his body was a ball of energy, his chest alternately aching and tingling. "I thought maybe we could tattoo this on you, somewhere for just you and I ... like your hip or something." He slid the sketchbook closer to show Jared the design he'd been working on.

The basis of it was simple and Yin and Yang symbol in blacks with grey shading. There was a blue wash around it in the same colours as the waves that Jared liked to trace so much on Jensen's arms. The waves burst up behind the symbol and curled around the sides making it look almost like it had shot up out of the water.

"Wow. That's... wow." Jared slid a finger down the sketch and grinned. "Yeah, okay. I'd like that. You'll do it though right?" It was going to be fucking scary as hell to get that tattoo done and the only person he trusted enough to do it was Jensen, even if it meant they couldn't hold hands while it was happening. The design was absolutely stunning, and Jared thought it looked almost like a tribute to all the things that were important in his life now. Mainly Jensen.

"Only me, and only if you want it. I don't mind drawing it on you every so often." Jensen laughed softly, "'cause that was pretty hot."

His expression changed slightly as he leaned his hip against the table and smiled up at Jared. "You still okay with this? Don't have to you know." Dropping his gaze Jensen hooked his finger through Jared's belt loop and pulled him a little closer.

"Jen, seriously, you've given me so many outs I almost think you don't want it." Jared laughed softly and shook his head, sliding his hand up through Jensen's hair. "I do. And I'm okay with it. And it's going to be really hot. _And_ I want the tattoo so there." He beamed at his boyfriend, dipping down to kiss his lips softly.

Jensen kissed him back and couldn't help grinning. "Oh, I _want_ it," he murmured against his boyfriend's mouth.

"Y'all better not be fuckin' up my outline in there," Chris yelled.

Throwing his head back, Jensen laughed and slid his hand around Jared's neck to pull him closer for just a moment. "I love you so fuckin' much it hurts," he whispered against Jared's ear.

Shivering slightly at the words, Jared looped his arm around Jensen's middle - careful not to touch his chest out of fear of Christian alone. "I know. I'm so madly in love with you it makes me a little crazy." He grinned at his boyfriend and ducked down, catching Jensen's lips against his own once more.

"Alright lovebirds, get your asses in here." Christian didn't sound nearly as irritated as Jensen thought the man hoped to.

"Coming," Jensen said. Still smiling at Jared he brushed his fingers over his boyfriend's rosy cheek and then threaded their fingers together. "Let's do it." He tugged Jared back across the hall and hopped back up on the massage table peering over at Christian's colour choices. The turquoises, darker blues and subtle mauves that Christian knew Jensen liked. "Looks good."

"'Cause I need your approval," Christian scoffed. Turning he looked up at Jared as he tugged a fresh pair of gloves on.

Jensen watched as his best friends smile softened, warmed and he looked up at Jared.

"You good Jay?" Christian raised an eyebrow.

"Definitely. Yeah." Jared nodded and bit down on his lip, considering them. His heart was hammering in his chest, heat spreading through his system at an almost intoxicating rate.

"This ain't about you and him. It's about me and you. This stays here in this room - it's something special for you and my man here so it's none of my business beyond what I see tonight. You got me?" Christian's eyes were on Jared.

Eyes widening slightly, Jared slowly nodded. "Yeah, I got it. Thanks." He wasn't sure if this was a thank you type situation but he had a feeling Christian and him were on the same page, both willing to do anything for Jensen in different ways. And he was pretty sure they all found the whole thing outrageously hot.

Glancing around, Jared spotted the stool on the far wall and slid it over, dropping down on Jensen's free side and taking his hand, turning it to place a small kiss on the inside of Jensen's wrist. Looking up he saw Jensen's mouth open once more and he laughed. "If you're about to say it's okay if I don't want to do this again I swear I won't."

"Was gonna say I loved you." Jensen wriggled around a bit and got settled on the bed then nodded at Christian.

Shaking his head one last time Christian dipped his needle into the blue ink and fired up the machine. Winking at Jensen he started shading at the top corner of the wave with the broad needle; almost rubbing strokes like he was scraping the colour onto the man's flesh. "You wanna hit his best spot Jay? Wait till I get closer to his nipple to make him shoot." Smirking Christian ducked his head and concentrated on the design.

Hearing Christian say _make him shoot_ put things in a whole new perspective for Jared. Mainly, that they were really fucking doing this. He'd never even _dreamed_ of doing something like this but it was seriously way more hot than he had even been prepared for. "Love you too," he murmured to Jensen, pushing up from the stool long enough to kiss beneath his ear before dropping back down.

The first step he knew was going to be the most difficult, pushing past the part of his brain that was accustomed to normality and stepping into the unknown. The buzz of the tattoo gun filled the room and Jared watched for a long moment, noting the way Jensen's face grew more and more red the more Christian worked.

Jared's fingers drifted to Jared's midsection, caressing the skin softly, finger tips tucking every so often under the denim. Jensen's jeans were loose, hanging low on his hips and Jared dipped down, tracing his tongue along the top of the exposed hip bone before circling his mouth over the skin and sucking softly, marking in his own way.

Jensen's awareness was torn between the soft sweetness of his boyfriend's lips and kisses and that grating drag-vibration of the tattoo needle on his flesh. Moving slowly, making sure he didn't move under the needle Jensen reached to comb his fingers through Jared's hair. His lashes fluttered and he smiled as his eyes met Christian's for the briefest moment then he closed them to let the feelings wash over him.

Rolling the taste of Jensen's skin over his tongue, Jared let the moment around him fade out slightly until it was just Jensen and him. His lips worked their way along Jensen's flesh, alternating between sucks and licks and the drag of his teeth. Jensen arousal was more than obvious and he laid his hand over the bulge in his jeans, massaging in a slow roll of his palm. The softest moan left Jensen's lips and Jared almost moaned in response to it.

His fingers shifted over the button, sliding it free from its hold, fingers pinching at the zipper and slowly dragging down. Just like that Jensen's cock was poking free and this time Jared did moan, knowing Jensen hadn't even put boxers on for this moment alone.

He let his eyes flutter open and drift up, tracing the flush on Jensen's skin, the tattoo gun moving over his chest, skittering briefly over Christian before meeting Jensen's eyes. Holding the gaze he let his tongue slip out and dip into the slit, swirling the sticky dollop of pre-come over his taste buds and drawing in, tonguing at the head in deliciously slow drags.

A bead of sweat was working its way down Jensen's neck and he let his hand drift slowly over Jared's hair to touch the damp skin on the back of the man's neck. "Jay," he murmured. The barely-there touch of Jared's tongue was insanely hot and Jensen felt himself shiver slightly. Christian hesitated and pulled the needle back for long enough to press a soothing touch to Jensen's chest. Smiling, Jensen tried to steady his breathing and felt Jared's long fingers curl over his far hip. Rubbing the back of Jared's neck Jensen moaned again, no longer able to even care what Christian heard. He was entirely focused on Jared, his mouth, the soft lick and teasing silky tongue.

It was surprisingly easy to forget that Christian was standing right there and maybe even watching. Jared figured Jensen was really exposing himself just as much if not more to the man so that clearly meant he trusted him. Shifting on the stool, Jared glanced up at Christian and waited until he pulled the tattoo gun back to wipe off the top before curling his fingers around Jensen's jeans and tugging down, freeing Jensen's cock the rest of the way and giving him room to work his own art on Jensen.

Forehead resting against Jensen's bare hip, Jared curled his fingers around the base of his lover's cock and squeezed softly, sliding up in slow strokes. He could just barely hear the soft pant coming from Jensen above the buzz and hum of the machine. Heat churned in his gut, bringing soft pants to his own lips and Jared pushed up once more, dragging his tongue along the length of his lover's cock, sweeping in slow stripes, circling along the head, dragging back down. His lover's taste exploded along his tongue and Jared moaned, shifting closer to the table.

Jensen's heart was pounding in his chest, his blood rushing everywhere. Each drag of the needle inched his desire higher but _God_ it was nothing compared to the sensation of finally having Jared's hand on his cock. He shifted his hips carefully, keeping his upper body still and reached his hand down to slide over Jared's thigh. "Jared... _God_. Yeah."

His voice sounded strange to his own ears - so deep and gravelly, his throat dry and aching. Jared's mouth was in constant motion over him, his tongue rasping against the over-sensitive flesh of Jensen's cock. He moaned, biting down on his lip and moving his hand further over Jared's thigh. He almost cried with relief when he realized that Jared had slid the stool close enough that he could reach the man's cock. The hard line in his jeans was hot even through the material and Jensen lifted his hand for a moment to Jared's cheek. "Jay, your jeans..." he murmured. "Fuckin' button."

"Oh Jesus," Jared moaned low in his throat, quickly dropping a hand to his jeans. He hadn't even realized Jensen would be able to touch him too but it was a damn good thing. He'd probably come in his jeans and embarrass himself otherwise and he'd so much rather have Jensen's hand on him. The button slid free after a few fumbles, zipper following shortly after, and Jared turned his attention back to Jensen's cock.

The moment he felt his boyfriend's hand on his skin Jared moaned, parted his lips and sucked hard flesh inside his mouth. It was always so intoxicating, always so amazing, Jared shifted as close as possible to drop down to the base of the man's cock. Heat instantly filled his mouth and Jared was moaning around it, swallowing to send the ripple of sensation up through Jensen's body. His hand planted firmly on Jensen's hip, keeping him in place as he began a slow bob along his cock.

The whole thing was gonna kill Jensen. The ceaseless buzzing of the machine as Christian worked on him, the scratching and grating of the needle, the soft sound and vibrating moans of his lover's voice wrapped around his cock; everything was _too_ much and Jensen felt like he was high. Doped right up on Jared, his body was humming with pleasure even as he had to fight every damn instinct to thrust his hips up into that perfect mouth.

Curling his fingers around Jared's cock Jensen stroked slowly, deliberately, sliding his thumb over the head and feeling the warm slickness of pre-come. Moaning he turned his head to the side, staring down at his lover's head and the way his lips stretched around his girth. Jensen's hand fell into the same rhythm as Jared's lips, sliding, slick and hot and Jensen tried to keep himself together.

He could feel the gentle circling of Jared's hips, the way his lover thrust forward into his hand and _God_ it was good to know that he could make Jared feel like that. Another loud moan against his cock and Jensen had to suck in a deep breath. He felt the needle lift off his chest for a moment and shifted, panting, and then the needle was back. Waves of lust and _want_ rippled down Jensen's body and he was sure he would fly right off the table if Jared didn't have such a good grip on his hip. That in itself was crazy-hot.

Jared had absolutely no idea where Christian was as far as the shading went and decided he didn't care so much. When Jensen came, he came, whether it was the supposedly most heightened area of pleasure or not. He knew exactly what he could do to the man and part of him thrived off that. Lips working constantly, suctioning along the swollen skin as he slid up, loosening as he reached the base once more, Jared found himself tumbling head first into the entire thing.

His hips were circling up, gentle thrusts into Jensen's hand, working the pleasure through him in constant waves along his spine. It was almost just as hot to be confined to this space, to know that he could pull away from all of this and tease his lover further. Not that he had any intention of doing that. Because the way Jensen struggled to thrust his hips into his mouth, the way his cock grazed over his tongue, the thick heat filling his mouth, all of it was too good for Jared to ever want to stop. Pulling up, just barely off the head, Jared glanced up at Jensen, wetting his lips. "Fuck you look so hot like that," he murmured and closed his eyes when Jensen's thumb pressed along the head of his cock, turning to glide his open mouth over Jensen's already slick skin.

Twisting his hand slightly Jensen slid his thumbnail down the underside of Jared's cock and smiled when his lover's hips rocked forward into his grasp. "You like that Jay?"

It was just him and Jared, the pain and the pleasure all tangled up together so Jensen couldn't even sort it out anymore. Everything in his body was alive, his nerve-endings firing over and over. His brow furrowed momentarily as the needle shifted closer to the already so-tender skin around his nipple. Rolling his head to the side, Jensen moaned, feeling his cock twitch against Jared's lips. "God, Jared ....please-" Jensen's breath hitched and his hand squeezed and slid to the base of Jared's cock so he could roll the man's balls gently between his fingers.

The plea was enough to do Jared in and he sucked Jensen's cock down to the base once more, humming around the skin, moaning when Jensen's hand on him applied just the right amount of pressure. The moans falling from Jensen's lips were growing steadily louder and Jared had to tighten his grip on his lover's hipbone to keep him from twisting off the table. Knowing Jensen was close, knowing he himself was only moments behind, Jared made up for Jensen's inability to fuck into his mouth by pushing up off the stool slightly and sliding quick, hard motions over the burning skin.

Jensen's hand on him increased speed and Jared moaned, hips snapping forward. He heard his name echoed from his lover's lips, soaking in on him and lost control, body twitching forward as his orgasm crashed unexpected, thick and heavy through every inch of him. Even as he rode out the release he relaxed his throat, prepared himself for Jensen's first initial burst of come.

Just feeling Jared's cock pulsing in his hand, _knowing_ this had turned his lover on - it all slammed into Jensen and crushed the breath right out of his body. It was like a lead weight within him that just melted and shot out of his body, come pulsing so _fucking_ hard Jensen was pretty sure he blacked out for a few moments. His fingers curled over Jared's hip, and he sank his teeth down over his bottom lip. With each pulse of come he felt the muscle of Jared's throat working his flesh, his lover's tongue swept over his flesh, pressing against it - sucking - leading Jensen through his orgasm.

Swallowing the last of his lover's release, Jared slowly pulled up, lips pressing softly to Jensen's hip bone, along his skin, waiting for Christian to lift the tattoo gun before dragging his jeans back up and almost tenderly tucking him back in. Eyes lifting slowly, Jared's gaze swept along the tattoo - surprised by how much had been finished - then locked up on Jensen's features. His cheeks were stained with color, pupils completely lust blown until there was hardly any green left at all, lips swollen from the way he'd obviously dragged his teeth along them. "Jesus that was hot," he murmured and sacrificed his shirt, working the buttons quickly and sliding it off so he could wipe Jensen's hand clean.

Jensen tried to say something, mumbled incoherently and just ended up staring at Jared bleary eyed and weak.

"Fuck." Christian's voice was thick and low. "That's it. I'm ... fuck - I gotta go."

Laughing weakly Jensen simply waved a hand at Christian. They'd finish whatever shading was left another time. Jensen had no idea how much work they'd done or if the tattoo was complete. His lashes fluttered closed and he heard the snap of Christian's gloves coming off and the wheels of his stool rolling on the floor.

Christian caught Jared's eye. "You'll cover that, take care of him?"

There was a true tenderness in Christian's tone that made Jensen's reach for the man's arm and squeeze gently before dropping his hand to the table.

"Yeah." Jared mumbled, flushing slightly and giving Christian a small smile before looking away. Maybe if things were different, if he wasn't so madly in love with Jensen or wasn't with him at all, he'd offer to help Christian out but he was still a little stuck on the idea of causing the man to look so... turned on. "Just, tell me what to do." Jared looked back at his boyfriend, pushing off his stool and hastily doing up his pants before dipping in to crush their lips together, sharing the taste with his lover.

Jensen heard the sound of the door closing behind Christian and leaned up off the table into the kiss. His heart was still pounding hard in his ears and he pressed his hand to Jared's shoulder to break the kiss. "Thank you," he murmured. "Never trusted anyone enough for that...can't imagine anyone else. Love you," he closed his eyes and tried to slow his breathing.

"Love you." Jared echoed and slumped slightly against the table, fingers trailing just beneath Jensen's fleshy marked skin. It seemed like Christian had managed a good portion, but Jared couldn't estimate how much was fully complete and what needed a bit more touch up. "Did we kill Christian?" He murmured, chuckling softly.

"Pretty sure." Jensen laughed softly and brushed Jared's hair back off his forehead. "You're gorgeous," he murmured. "I'm sorry - I'm kinda fucked up." Jensen grinned dopily and reached out to tug the wheeled tray towards them. "Gotta cover."

Grinning at Jensen, Jared moved over to the tray and followed the man's sleepy instructions to cover the tattoo up. Jensen did look pretty out of it, but in the most appealing away, and Jared was not troubled in the slightest to help him up off the table once the tattoo was completely covered. His arms wrapped around Jensen from the back, bringing the man's back to his chest and dipping down to nuzzle softly into his hair. "Back to your place?" Jared thought Jensen would be absolutely crazy to either drive or have Jared go home for the night, there was no place Jared wanted to be more than in bed with Jensen.

"Yeah, stay with me. Want you there." Jensen leaned heavily against his lover for a few moments, hands sliding up to cover Jared's. "Wanna fall asleep with you."

-=-=-=-

Jensen woke up to the sun beating down on his face and swatted at it for a few moments like he could actually get it to go away. He smiled when he felt the fiery heat of Jared's chest pressed up against his back. He loved waking up with Jared, the scent of him, the feel of him. Something crinkled as he moved and Jensen realized the bandage had managed to stay on overnight. Even thinking about the night before started a smile bending his lips.

Slipping out of Jared's arms carefully Jensen padded over to the kitchen area and set about making coffee and getting some breakfast ready for Jared. He glanced over at the bed occasionally, watching once with a smirk on his face as Jared rolled over and muttered something.

He was in love. So fucking in love it was ridiculous. As Christian would put it, giddy fucking, birds twittering around his damn head _in love_. Jared was everything that Jensen had looked for and even some things that he hadn't known he wanted.

Like, who would have thought Jensen would actually like someone who was a complete and total klutz? But there was something just so completely adorable about the way Jared barely managed not to kill himself at some point in nearly every day. Even better was the fact that Jensen had noticed that Jared had relaxed around him to the point where he wasn't as clumsy. It was like he found some kind of peace when he was with Jensen and that was mind-blowingly awesome.

Getting a tray off the hanging shelf Jensen put a dish of yogurt, some granola, cream and cut up fruit on it then poured two cups of coffee. Adding an extra spoonful of sugar beyond what Jared usually took he grinned again; nothing was ever _too_ sweet for Jared.

Padding back across the warehouse Jensen set the tray on the nightstand and sat down on the edge of the bed. Leaning down he breathed softly against Jared's ear. "Hey you, time for breakfast." Trailing his lips down Jared's cheek he chuckled softly when the man flapped a hand at him and whacked him lightly across the end of his nose.

Jared figured if he had to be awake, being awake when Jensen was there waking him up was alright. "You breakfast?" Jared murmured and slid closer, pressing his lips to Jensen's side and dragging softly over the skin. A slow grin worked along Jared's lips and he hummed happily, low in his throat. Every day should start like this.

Laughing, Jensen settled down beside Jared. "As appealing as that sounds, no. I _really_ made you breakfast. Figured I owed you 'cause I kinda checked out on you last night after..." He kissed Jared's long neck, loving the way the sun lit up his skin.

"I thought it was hot. Like I gave you the blow job to kill your brain or something." Jared laughed and slowly pushed up into Jensen, forcing himself to slide up until he was sitting. "You keep that up and you will be my breakfast." He nuzzled close into his boyfriend. "Every day should start like this," he grinned as he voiced his thought aloud.

Sitting up Jensen grabbed the tray and slid it on the Jared's lap then lay back down beside Jared. "You did, it was... _fuck_. Simply the most amazing thing ever." Jensen could feel the heat of a flush on his cheeks and leaned in to Jared's arm. "Thank you," he almost whispered.

"It was my pleasure." Jared murmured and lifted the coffee up to his lips for a small drink, snagging a piece of fruit after. "Any other fantasies we should be discussing?" Jared grinned, breakfast in bed, Jensen pressed against his side, the happy glow in his head, he couldn't imagine anything better.

Rolling on to his back Jensen grinned and slid his hand over Jared's thigh. "I'm sure there will be many. You got classes today?"

"Mmhmm. Every day. Okay not every day but you know, Monday through Friday. You know Jensen, I'm graduating in two months. And I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life." Jared popped more fruit into his mouth and considered if it were odd that he didn't sounded more concerned about this idea.

"Get a job? What you wanna do? You must have had something in mind when you went into business." Jensen stole a cherry. "You could look at my business and tell me what the hell to do." He laughed and squeezed Jared's thigh.

Smiling softly, Jared sipped on more coffee and shrugged. "My dad picked my major. I'm sure your business is doing just fine but I wouldn't mind taking a look, just to see. You have an accountant and things like that right?" He felt oddly domestic like this, cuddling in bed and chatting about normal life over breakfast. Jared was tempted to ask Jensen if he could just live here forever.

"No? Should I have an accountant? Christian and I do the books. Mostly. Sometimes we take them to this friend of his if we get stuck." Jensen cared much more about art than business; that was why Christian said they'd never be rich.

"You know Jensen; I could probably help you out a little. Take a look at what you're paying for things, those kinds of things, I bet I could get you set up in a different arrangement, you know, increase your profit margins and stuff. Didn't spend the past five years doing this for no reason." Jared wouldn't mind helping Jensen out, he'd never cared much about his business degree but it was a lot different if Jensen was involved. "If you want, no pressure or anything."

"Sure, I'd like that. I could pay you - give you some extra money?" Grinning, Jensen grabbed another cherry. "I've got a damn good feeling about you and I Jared. And, I like it." Looking up at his boyfriend, Jensen smiled softly.

"You don't have to pay me and yeah. I've got a damn good feeling about us too." Jared laughed and lifted the tray to the side, rolling over on top of Jensen. "You know the talent you have Jensen? You could do so much with it. Have you ever made bigger pieces? Like have an art gallery or something?" Jared's mind was sparking with ideas and he grinned. "Maybe my job will be to help people create businesses and amazing things for their life."

Laughing, Jensen slid his hand over the back of Jared's neck and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. "Maybe, but i like touching skin... putting my art on someone forever. It's like the ultimate trust. Trust is big for me," he kissed the corner of Jared's mouth. "You may have noticed that." Smile warming Jensen pulled his boyfriend down and cradled his head against his chest.

"I may have." Jared chuckled softly and twisted to capture Jensen's lips in a deep kiss. "I'ma skip class today. What do you want to do instead?" He slid his legs to either side of Jensen's hips and closed his eyes, pulling in the warmth from his body.

Humming against Jared's hair, Jensen grinned again. "Honestly? Good movie, cold beer, you in my arms on the couch? Sound okay?"

"Sounds perfect." Jared laughed softly and rolled his hips slowly against Jensen. "After you give me a proper good morning of course." He'd only been home a couple of nights since the girl's moved out and really, staying here was much better anyway.

"That could be arranged," Jensen murmured.

-=-=-=-

"Jensen? I want you to sit down." Christian's voice was strained. Different somehow and Jensen's smile faltered.

"What? Why? I just got here." Jensen's eyes studied his friend's expression and then he took a slow step to the side and sank down on to the stool at the front counter. "You alright?"

"Yeah. Just. I gotta show you somethin' and I don't want you to like - flip your shit."

Jensen's brow furrowed. "You know Chris? If you’re trying to keep me calm the buildup is kind of shitty." Rubbing nervously at the back of his neck, Jensen leaned on the counter.

"Okay. I just - just don't-"

"Christian!"

Christian ran a hand through his thick blonde hair and then dropped his head for a few moments. "Okay," he said softly as he leaned down to reach below the counter. Sliding a magazine onto the counter Christian pushed it across toward Jensen with one finger then leaned on the counter.

Smile wavering Jensen reached out and pulled it closer. _Jared_. He smiled; it wasn't every day a guy he was dating was on the cover of a magazine. It was a nice photo of Jared, almost like a professional head-shot for an actor or something and then his eyes trailed over the story by-line. _Campus **It** Boy._ Brows drawing together in confusion Jensen glanced up at Christian then back down at the magazine. "Chris?"

Sighing, Christian swore softly under his breath. "Turns out, he's not quite who we thought he was. The kid's like some kind of famous. You know that _Chef Sharon_ show? That's his mom. And, his Dad, Gerri Padalecki owns half the fuckin' city. His brother is Jeff Padalecki, director. He did that _Vortex_ movie you wouldn't go see with me 'cause you went to that stupid Dragon thing."

It was the movie that kind of sank Jensen's heart. That's why Jared had acted so strangely at the movie theatre. Not only did he _not_ want Jensen to go and see a movie with his brother's name in the credits - but the girls. "Where did you get this?"

"Jensen? You need to just take this in stride. It could totally _not_ be as bad as it looks."

"Where did you get it?" Jensen took the magazine and slipped it into his bag.

Christian winced and fiddled with a pen on the counter. "My first piercing this morning, two chicks from the school and they were going on about how cute he was and how he-" His face blanched.

"He what?" Jensen's stomach was twisted in a knot, aching and lead-filled in his gut.

"Broke up with Sandy recently. So - he's now like the most eligible bachelor on campus and they wanted him for this stupid auction for fundraising. Some shit - I dunno. Listen, you know the guy, this doesn’t change that-"

"It doesn't?" Jensen's voice was soft, stern, and almost void of emotion. It was everywhere else in him though. His chest felt like there was a vice on it, hard squeezing out beats like it didn't even want to keep going.

"Jensen. You love this kid. He might be an idiot for keeping secrets but you don't know why he did this... or if he even intended to."

Blinking, Jensen raised his eyes to Christian's. Angry tears welling in them. "I _don't_ know, that's just the thing. I never fuckin' know this shit until it's too late." Sliding off the stool Jensen headed toward the door.

"Jensen? Where you going? Stay here. We'll talk..." Christian moved around the counter and held out his hands like he was nearing a wild animal.

"I'm just going home. You've got a key - it's not like I can keep you away." Jensen's shoulders slumped and he pulled the door open. "Jared will be coming by later, he was gonna-" Jensen's voice broke and he cleared his throat before continuing. "When he shows up tell him I said _fuck you._ "

Slipping out the front door Jensen moved quickly to his car and was speeding off down the street moments later.

-=-=-=-

When Jared turned off his SUV he finished singing the song on the radio, laughing at his own stupidity. He chalked it up to being madly in love or something. Glancing around, he frowned when he didn't see Jensen's car but assumed the guy had parked in back or something. They were going to go get lunch but Jared was going to try and talk Jensen into just going back to his place instead for a bit, because he was a bit addicted and that wasn't a bad thing.

There was no one up front and Jared looked around before shrugging and heading for the back. Jensen's usually room was dark and empty but he could see the light on in Christian's room so he headed that way, wondering if they were finishing up his tattoo today.

"Christian?" Jared tapped on the door, praying the man wasn't napping or something because he was freaky enough to not want to wake him up and suffer the consequences.

Christian looked up from the drawing his was working on. His eyes narrowed slightly and he dropped his gaze again and went back to shading. "You really need to not be here right now."

"What?" Jared peeked into the room and frowned, shifting a little forward. No Jensen. "What's going on? Where's Jensen?" His mind flared with panic, maybe something had happened to his boyfriend and he'd missed some important call. Jared pulled out his phone to check just in case but there was nothing.

Christian's arm snapped out and shot his sketchbook and pencil across the room into the wall. "You want a piece of advice from me Jared?"

"Um." Jared's brows furrowed in confusion, half stepping back from the tone in Christian's voice. "Sure? What's going on Christian?"

"You don't-" Christian closed his eyes for a moment then opened them and locked them on Jared's. "You don't fuck up something like what you have with Jensen. You don't. Do you _know_ how fucking amazing that guy is? 'Cause really? I don't think you do. I think if you knew what he was like you'd trust that man with your life."

Christian closed the distance between them and snatched up a handful of Jared's shirt. "You need to get your skinny ass over there, to his place and fix this shit." Shoving hard he stood there, fists clenched at his sides as Jared stumbled back a few steps.

"But." Jared felt something sickening churn in his stomach and he turned over all the things that had happened in the past few days, searching for something he'd done wrong. "I don't understand. What did I do? What do I have to fix?" He rubbed at his shirt, over his heart, trying to ease the way his chest was aching suddenly.

"Get the _fuck_ outta here before I remember that promise I made to hurt you if you ever hurt him. I'm giving you once chance Jared. Because I see on Jensen's face how much that idiot loves you. Get. Out." Christian turned back to the room and started picking up the scattered papers.

"But I don't-" Jared begin but Christian shot him another look and he had no real choice but to turn and head for the door. He couldn't place what he might have done, unless he'd unintentionally offended his boyfriend somehow. They hadn't gone out in public together for awhile, Jared wondered if that was finally weighing on Jensen. Or, Jensen could have finally seen Vortex and put together the director thing - Padalecki wasn't exactly a common last name - but he couldn't imagine that being enough to make Christian so upset on Jensen's behalf.

He didn't really register driving to Jensen's place, though he was sure he sped because it only took about five minutes. Using the key to let himself in, Jared hurried to the elevator and wished it would move a little faster to get him up to Jensen's home.

When he stepped out of the lift his eyes fixed on Jensen at his art table and Jared took a few quick steps forward before hesitating. "Jen?" He asked quietly, unsure how to begin approaching a subject he didn't even know about.

Jensen didn't look up from his drawing, hand moving deftly over the page of the sketchbook Jared had given him. "When I found out about Derek, how he wasn't what I thought it was like a kick in the gut. This heavy feeling in my gut like someone had filled it with concrete because - the thing about it is if there's that one thing that's a lie, then how do I know what was the truth?" Smoothing his hand over the page in front of him Jensen sighed. "Can I trust you Jared?"

It clicked together surprisingly quick in Jared's mind considering how clueless he'd been moments before. Somehow, Jensen had learned everything about him, before Jared had the chance to explain it all. But this was nothing like what Derek had done, not even close. "You can," Jared said quietly and stepped close, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "Jensen, is this, um, is this about my family?" His foot caught behind the other and Jared stumbled a moment before straightening out, heart slamming hard in his chest.

Reaching to the side Jensen picked up the magazine and tossed it at Jared. He didn't much care if the guy caught it or got hit with it so he didn't bother looking. _Couldn't_ look at Jared. He'd been working on a sketch of Jared since he got home, the Jared he _thought_ he knew; bright-eyed and sleep-tousled, holding out a cherry in the palm of one hand.

Jared flinched when the magazine slammed into him and fumbled with it for a moment, already knowing what it was. A slow breath fell from his lips and Jared wondered where to begin, feeling everything in him sink painfully slow. "This. This isn't, it's, Jensen, it's nothing. It's not true, most of it, Sandy and I and all. That's just, I mean." Dragging a hand through his hair Jared stepped quickly forward, reaching out to touch Jensen's arm. "Please, let me explain it all to you. I'll tell you the whole story and you'll see it's not as bad as you think. You know the real me, you know the me most people don't, the _real_ me. Please, just give me a chance." He'd beg on his knees if he had to, Jensen was _that_ important.

"Don't touch me," Jensen whispered. He was shaking, had to drop his pencil to keep from fucking up the drawing. Sliding off the stool Jensen walked back a few steps then turned to head over to the bed and drop down on the end. He throat was thick like someone was trying to strangle him or something and each breath took a lot of work to get in. Pulling out his phone he thought briefly about calling Christian because it was too close; too close to all that shit form before and Jensen wasn't sure how to stay out of that pit again.

Pain flared hot and intense through Jared and his eyes pricked with tears. Through the blur across his vision he could see the drawing; it was of himself, smiling and bright. Jared was either going to chuckle at the cherry he was holding in the drawing or burst into sobs. What came out was somewhere close to a half sob.

" _Please_ Jensen. Don't do this. I'm not him. I'm not someone completely different. This is me, this is the real me. My family, those little things, they're just stupid details but they don't make me, me." Jared crossed to the bed but didn't sit down, didn't get to close, couldn't handle being pushed away again. "Please give me a chance. I love you, I'm so madly in love with you, I never, ever meant to hurt you like this. Just let me explain."

"You _are_ different," Jensen said softly. Keeping his gaze on his phone he flipped it over and over in his hand, watching the sun glint off the screen. "That's why you can't come out - it's about public image and people knowing you're not the perfect _bachelor_. Bad for business or something. I told you...about Derek. How do you explain doing this after what I told you 'cause I'm not so sure I believe you can." Jensen finally dragged his gaze up to Jared's face and had to look away.

"That's bullshit." Jared whispered tightly, stepping back as his arms folded over his chest. "If you seriously- if you think, that I'm just about public image, and the perfect _bachelor_ that you never even knew me in the first place. I never told you because I don't give a flying shit what my parents do for a living. They're just my parents. If I were just caring about my image then I never would have done any of this, I wouldn't have gone out with you at all. So freaking what that my mom is mildly famous, as if my brother … and my dad is stupid rich. How does that make me any different? Is it so bad I just wanted to be with someone who didn't see all those other things as a background to who I am?"

Jared had _known_ not telling Jensen all the facts wasn't the best idea but, somehow, he'd thought Jensen would understand. There was nothing worse than being judged and labeled by things you couldn't help. "You know who I am Jensen. Just like I know who you are. Please, _please_ don't write me off for this. You love me don't you, we can get through this." It was getting hard to breath and Jared roughly wiped at his cheeks, knowing half the words were choked through tears.

"I don't wanna see you anymore." Jensen felt like his body was turning inside out, just like someone had reached inside him and was pulled out everything one handful at a time.

"What?" Jared whispered, stumbling backward a few steps like Jensen's words were a physical blow. "No. No Jensen. You can't do this. _No_." He didn't understand why Jensen couldn't just listen to him, couldn't give him a chance, allow a small mistake - that was maybe not so small but they _could_ get past it.

"I can't?" Jensen's eyes snapped up to Jared's. "You lie... you hide the big stuff, why would you tell the truth about the small things? This isn't about you having a famous family or lying to me about Sandy. It's about how I manage to ever know when you're telling the truth. You've lied to everyone, not just me. Your family - all these people at your school. And you stand there in front of me and tell me that this is something to get through?" Jensen shook his head.

Having it all laid out there like that, Jared knew there was no way to deny it all. He could see the look in Jensen's eyes, broken and hurt. Betrayed. Jared _was_ just as bad as Derek. Maybe he was even worse. "I'm sorry." He whispered and turned away when a sob tore harshly from his chest. "I'm so sorry. I, I just wanted to have... just someone who didn't know. About, just someone I could be me with. I didn't-" Jared stepped forward, forcing himself to head for the elevator. He knew what he said wouldn't matter anymore. If there was one thing everyone could tell about Jensen it was his independence, his ability to make a decision and stick to it. It was over and Jared couldn't even feel the ground beneath his feet.

The wall by the elevator knocked into Jared's shoulder hard and he cried out, surprised by how much it hurt. He'd barely made it inside and dragged the door shut, hit the button to ride down before he was sliding down to the ground and curling in on himself. Jared didn't care if Jensen could hear him crying, just like he didn't care that he probably spent a half hour or more sitting in the lift and alternating between shock and tears.

Some part of him kept thinking maybe Jensen would come for him, ease the ache in his chest, tell him that they could work this out, that he could forgive Jared for being an idiot. It didn't happen. His legs were sore and tense when Jared finally managed to stand and tug the door open heading for the front door of the warehouse. He paused there, thinking of all his things still up in Jensen's place and the key on his key chain.

Jared decided to keep it. It would give Jensen a need to call him or get in touch somehow. Even if it was only to ask for his key back at least Jared would get to hear his voice once more. Even if he knew it would likely be tinged with the cold detachment he'd heard moments before.

All in all, it was a miracle Jared made it home - home to his stupid three story house - and when he was finally sitting in the silence on his couch, he broke down in sobs all over again.


	6. Chapter 6

Surprisingly, Jared didn't call Sandy or Katie for three days. He did go to school though, went through classes, and stopped into the office that made the magazine that had kind of wrecked his life. _That_ had been interesting but it was something he had to do. For himself. Not for anyone else and he made that clear during the entire process. It wasn't like he could say Jensen's name without bursting into tears all over again.

When he did call the girls it was obvious they'd either spoken with Jensen or Christian. They weren't happy with him. Jared wasn't really that surprised. He asked if he could come over for a minute anyway and because they were still his friends - and obviously taking pity on him - they said yes. It had always been a natural thing with them, their friendship and the connection they shared. So it hurt when there was just the three of them sitting in the girl's quaintly decorated living room, no one saying a thing. Jared could feel Sandy's disappointment and concern, Katie's unease.

"I'm gay." He began, looking up and catching both their faces morph to confusion. "I think I have been for a really long time, maybe my whole life. And I don't want to be a real estate agent, or a business tycoon. I don't want to be famous. Right now I just kind of don't want to be at all but I could never-" Jared's voice caught and he looked away, sniffing. At some point he thought the tears had to stop but it wasn't happening. "Truthfully, I have no idea what I want out of life. I don't have any real passions, well, one. But he doesn't want to be with me anymore because I lied to him and I think I deserve that."

"Oh Jared," Sandy whispered, climbing out of her seat and moving to his side. "You have passions."

"Not really Sandy. Not really at all." Jared met her gaze. He'd been doing a lot of thinking over the past few days - when you lived a giant house all by yourself all you could do was think - and he'd never been surer of something.

"I'm pretty sure everyone has this image of who I am in their mind and it can't possibly be right because _I_ don't even know me. The one good thing I had, the first time in my life something that was just _mine_ , and I completely destroyed it. What I did to Jensen? How this will affect him? I'm going to spend the rest of my life hating myself for that because someone like Jensen should never be hurt, and never be broken, and I kind of wish Christian would just come and hunt me down and kill me already because I deserve it."

It didn't seem like either girl's knew what to say. Jared didn't blame them. He was well aware now more than ever of his mistakes and knew they were too. But he was glad they didn't kick him out, and for a little while he let himself be comforted by their soft words and touches. When he left he wasn't feeling any better but maybe a little lighter, maybe his brain was a little less cloudy.

That weekend he saw his parents.

It had been six horrible, hollow, empty days since Jensen and he broke up and Jared sometimes walked from one place to another without knowing how he got there. That wasn't the case with the drive to his parents. He felt every single agonizing moment like a dead weight, sinking lower and lower in his chest. By the time he pulled up in the familiar half circle driveway, Jared was a bit concerned he'd be sick.

Stepping inside was no easier. He shook his dad's hand and hugged his mom and tried to smile when she said he didn't look so good. Jared didn't want to waste time with pleasantries; something always seemed to happen to ruin things if he did. Like his dad would get a call or his mom would head off to the kitchen. So, he told them he needed to talk to them privately and they led him to the living room.

A million times he'd sat in that room, on that couch, and Jared had a sickening hunch it would be the last time in a long while.

"I'm gay." He said in a whisper and it was oddly easier this time, than it had been with Katie and Sandy weirdly enough and certainly easier than the time before. Maybe if he said it enough than it would just keep getting easier. Maybe he should start telling random people on the street just so it would be.

"What?" Sharon was clearly surprised; Jared couldn't bring himself to look at his dad. "But, what about Sandy?"

"She's, she was just pretending. For me. As a favor because she's a good friend." Jared shrugged and stared down at his knees. He didn't deserve her much either. Jared was starting to think he should just pack up all of his things and move to another state, another city, and start over. "I've known for a long time. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before."

"You can't be gay." Gerri finally spoke up, shaking his head roughly. "You aren't gay. You like girls Jared. Stop this."

Jared blinked up at his dad and smiled. It really wasn't the time for that. "I kind of can't. I mean, I can't just stop being gay." Jared shrugged and dropped his gaze. His dad didn't look amused in the slightest.

"Is there... someone? You're seeing?" Sharon asked after a few quiet moments of silence.

Looking back up quickly, Jared felt his heart flip over in his chest and slowly shook his head. "No. There was. There was this one guy, I love him a lot actually," tears pricked at Jared's eyes and he dropped his gaze. "But we're not together anymore."

"Oh." Sharon sighed and Jared could see her glance toward her husband out of the corner of his eye. "Jared, why didn't you tell us sooner?"

"Scared to." Jared mumbled and shifted his arms across his chest.

The ringing of his dad's cell phone echoed around the room and Jared looked up, watching with a surprising _lack_ of surprise when the man answered. "Gerri, really," Sharon frowned her disapproval, touching the man's arm.

"Gotta take this." Gerri grunted and headed out of the room.

Jared watched him go, frowning slightly before looking at his mom. "Is he... is this, going to be okay? Is he mad at me?"

"I'm sure he just needs time to adjust," Sharon said softly and patted the spot beside her on the couch. "Come here, talk to me. Tell me about everything."

So Jared did. And it was really the best thing that had happened all week. His mom was wonderfully understanding, listening to Jared tell the whole fall out with Jensen - tell how very much he loved the man and how he hated himself for messing up - and she even soothed him when he cried on her shoulder. Jared knew how lucky he was, that she was willing to listen, to give him a chance, to accept him. He thought _maybe_ he could be okay, maybe he could feel again. Hopefully.

-=-=-=-

The next morning Jared felt at least marginally better about things as he headed out for his class. Sure, it still hurt like hell and he couldn't really bring himself to smile but, those were little things and he could get there again. If he worked hard enough. His classes passed as usual, nothing out of the ordinary, and Jared was really just biding his time until the next magazine came out - _that_ magazine - when he got home.

Only, his home was not his home anymore.

All of his clothes, movies and CDs - personal laptop and a few other random items were strewn across the grass. It was a nice enough neighborhood - gated and all - that it seemed like everything was there but Jared was a little more stuck on the _what the fuck_ to really take catalog of his items. The door was open, Jared almost would have thought he was being robbed if this wasn't a gated, guard watched community, and he stepped forward with obvious hesitation.

Inside was his dad and a few men Jared didn't know. "Dad? What's going on?" Jared frowned, looking around the house.

"Jared Padalecki?" One of the suited men turned to him and stepped forward. "I'm Scot Nettles, representing Gerald Padalecki. If you could step this way I have some papers that need to be signed."

"Papers?" Jared frowned, looking from his dad to the man in the suit and back. "Can someone please tell me what's happening?" Jared was really getting tired of situations in which he wasn't prepared for the next outcome.

This was most definitely one of those situations. The papers turned out to be forfeit of property. Not only that but there was document after document detailing his father's demands that Jared hand over his credit cards, cover all future and present education expenses, and vacate all Padalecki premises. If Jared didn't comply with the demands, a court date was threatened at the bottom in big black bold ink.

Jared could only stare in shock, trying to absorb the information. "You're... suing me?" Jared blinked up at his dad, the little last remnants of his heart shattering. "Seriously dad? You're fucking _suing_ me?" This had to be some kind of cruel joke, Jared was sure of it, because just yesterday he'd been lying in his mom's arms and thinking he could still be strong enough to handle this.

"There is no money required Mr. Padalecki, just the return of certain possessions." Scot Nettles said, as official as possible.

Jared's dad had yet to speak a word.

That was the breaking point for Jared. He slammed his hands down on the table and angrily scribbled his name across the bottom line. Tugging out his wallet, Jared pulled out every card - savagely thinking how relieved he was that he'd always made a habit of withdrawing cash on Monday mornings to get him through the week - and yanked at his key chain. The key to Jensen's place was right by the one to his house and Jared touched it for just a moment before yanking what was his house key off the hook.

"There you fucking go _Gerald_. Way to fit into every stereotype of the high class asshole. I'll be sure to look you up in hell." Jared bit the words because he was too far accustomed to shock to really feel it anymore.

He left the house before any type of response could be made. It put everything into real prospective, gathering up his personal belongings from the front yard of the place that had once been his home. Jared had lived twenty two years pretty uneventfully and suddenly, in this past week, it was like he'd stepped into a parallel universe where it was the world against Jared. If Jared had wanted to be more than just his family, if he'd wanted to not be associated with the semi-fame belonging to them, well he'd just gotten his wish in the most unexpected way.

Later on, when he was in a beat down room of an extended stay motel, Jared had to sit back and try and make himself believe that just a little over a week ago he'd been laying in Jensen's arms, safe and happy, madly in love. It didn't seem like anything more than a dream now. He picked up his phone, thinking he'd call Jensen's line just to leave a message and let him know where he was - just in case - but the phone had been disconnected.

Jared tossed it onto the bed and considered drowning himself in the shower. Just for a few minutes.

-=-=-=-

This time, Jared was pretty damn sure he wouldn't ever see this shop after he'd left. He stared at it through his windshield for a few minutes, wondering if he was strong enough to go in. He'd been putting it off for two weeks though, since the break up, one week since the loss of his house and his life and his family. Jared might not have even talked to Sandy and Katie if they hadn't been super sneaky and somehow tracked him down somehow.

A quick sweep didn't show Jensen's car - Jared was both relieved and disappointed - and he dropped his head as he headed inside. It kind of pained him to think the only smiles he'd been having recently were faked ones on the job interviews he'd been going on. Weird how no one wanted to hire a person who'd dropped out of business school two months before graduating. And explaining - even if it _was_ easier and easier to say he was gay - didn't get him much respect.

There was no one in the front room so Jared just rang the bell. Maybe it would be someone other than Christian or Jensen, maybe he could just pass along a note because last he knew, Christian kind of wanted to kill him. Dropping his elbows onto the counter top, Jared let his head rest in his hands, slightly worried he might actually fall asleep standing right there. The bed in his rented room was probably only six foot long and closer to a box than a bed. And yet, Jared found the constant physical ache mildly helped the eternal, deeper ache, so he dealt with it.

Christian came around the corner of the hall and stopped abruptly. Folding his arms over his chest he leaned back against the wall. "Hey, Jared."

Biting back the groan, Jared straightened up slightly and looked at Christian. "Hey. I know, I shouldn't be here. I leave in a second. I was just, I need to get some of the things I left at Je- at the warehouse." It still hurt to say Jensen's name out loud, Jared avoided it as often as possible. "My phone's disconnected, so I had to come in."

Studying Jared's face for a few moments Christian pushed off the wall and turned, "come have a coffee, just made some." He headed down the hallway without waiting for an answer.

Following uncertainly, Jared really could use a cup of coffee; he tried not to be too nervous. After all, Christian probably wouldn't really kill him. He hoped. "Thanks," he said quietly when he stepped after Christian into the room.

Flipping two mugs over Christian slid the coffee pot off the machine and filled them both. "Sandy came by, wanted to book her next appointment with Jensen. He's not working right now though. Guess she didn't want me looking at her ass." He nodded at the cream and sugar on the counter so Jared could make up his coffee.

"He's not working right now?" Jared asked quietly, stepping forward to make up his coffee. He made it like Jensen would have taken his, by accident, but left it that way. "Like, not today, or, has he gone somewhere?" Christian had to know Jared would ask for any information about Jensen that he could get.

"He's in town, won't fuckin' leave his warehouse really." Christian shrugged then looked up, expression softening slightly. "He's okay though, I got him."

"Oh. Okay." Jared said quietly, feeling the wave of guilt crash in on him all over again. "Do you think, could you get my stuff? I don't care about most of it but there's a couple of things, a watch, I um, I need to sell it. So. Yeah." Jared had never struggled to make ends meet, and he'd skipped more than a few meals this past week because of it. But he couldn't bring himself to take up Sandy and Katie's offer to stay with them. After all, they'd moved out to have their privacy in the first place.

"You still got a key; I'll call Jen and get him out of that damn place. You can go pick up your shit. If that's what you want. That what you want?" Christian stared at Jared over the rim of his coffee mug.

"What do you mean?" Jared looked up at Christian, eyes slightly wide. "That's how it has to be. Jensen doesn't want to see me. I know this. I'll leave his key there, so you don't have to worry about it." He was a little more than confused about Christian's attitude but didn't try asking for an explanation, the man wasn't trying to kill him so that was something.

"Sandy told me what you did. Coming out in a magazine? Pretty ballsy. She also said things haven't gone so well for you with the whole family thing. She talks a lot." Christian shook his head slightly and shrugged.

"Sounds like Sandy." Jared nodded, not having enough energy to devote to being upset with her. "Doesn't matter, I dropped out of school. Couldn't afford it. So everyone knows but I'm not even there. Does, does he know?" Jared didn't think it made a difference at this point, but he wondered anyway.

"I try to tell him stuff. Dunno what he listens to." Christian sniffed and slid his coffee onto the counter. "Listen kid, I'm running the shop for ... well, who fuckin' knows how long. Jensen told me once that you had some ideas for helping out around here. You need a job?"

"I don't have any talent. Art talent." Jared quickly corrected himself so it wouldn't sound too pathetic. "He would freak out if he knew I was working in his shop." Jared would rather Jensen go back to doing what he loved best then take a job that could keep him away.

"You don't want it - that's fine with me, Jared. But I can't tattoo, pierce _and_ run the place by myself. I can post an ad or somethin'. Jensen's not.. the shop's not where his brain is at right now. I don't know if he's comin' back but he worked hard for this place and I'm gonna try and keep it here for if he _does_." Christian pushed off the counter and poured the rest of his coffee down the sink. "You wanna swing by his place tonight around seven? I'll go pick him up and _make_ the idiot go somewhere." Christian headed toward the door hesitating for a moment to pat Jared on the shoulder.

"Okay. I um, I'll think about the job thing okay? I'll let you know soon." It wasn't like he had a lot of options. Chugging down the rest of his coffee - ignoring the way it burned going down - Jared turned and headed for the door, calling a goodbye over his shoulders as he left.

-=-=-=-

It felt mildly uncomfortable and mostly weird to head into Jensen's warehouse. Jared was planning on getting whatever he needed as fast as possible and getting out of there because it was definitely going to hurt. The last time he'd been in the lift he spent a good deal of time crying but Jared tried not to think about that as he rode up to the second floor. When he pulled the door open the light was on and Jared frowned for a moment before his eyes landed on Jensen.

The man was standing shirtless in the middle of the large room, like Jared had caught him on his way to the kitchen. He looked tired, worn out, jeans ratted and old and paint stained. Even _then_ he was the best thing Jared had ever seen. "You, you weren't supposed to be here." Jared whispered, fleetingly annoyed with Christian for putting him in this position.

Jensen found himself just staring for a few moments, a weak sort of tingle spreading out from his core. "I know," he shrugged. "Kane gave me a half hour warning." Blinking slowly Jensen scratched at the top of his head. "You look good. I thought you might look-" Jensen shrugged, "well, you look good."

"What did you think I'd look like?" Jared was surprised he looked good; he sure as hell didn't feel good. And now he was completely stuck, unsure what to do next, wondering why Jensen had stuck around to see him at all.

"Different? I don't know." Finally dropping his gaze, Jensen gestured to a box over by the end of the bed. "Put your stuff in there for you."

"Okay." Jared nodded, looking to the box and then around the room slowly. "So, so Christian told you. About, the things? My changes and all?" He let his gaze drift over Jensen once more, fingers itching to slide over his skin.

"Yeah," Jensen took a step toward Jared and stopped. "Was good, brave. I'm sorry 'bout how things are with your Dad. That's rough shit." Jensen knew first hand that kind of rejection and hated the way he could see it etched on Jared's face.

"Not the worst thing that's happened to me in the past couple of weeks." Jared mumbled and shrugged, looking up at Jensen. "I miss you." He admitted in a soft whisper, blowing out a breath and looking the other way. "I know I fucked up. And, I understand, if, you know, if we can't- but, your shop. Jensen, you should be there. That's your true gift, and you're so talented, and Sandy would be really upset if you couldn't do her ass tattoo." He tried a small smile but kept his eyes turned to the side, knowing he didn't really have much room to tell Jensen what he should or shouldn't be doing.

"It felt all wrong. Just didn't wanna touch anyone you know? There's only one person I -" Shaking his head Jensen looked away quickly. "Christian told me about the job. I don't mind if you're there. Sounds like you could use the money." Sliding his palm over his still-healing tattoo Jensen felt his stomach knot even tighter. He'd thought that he could just stand there, maybe say something that would straighten his head out but the words weren't coming and he was starting to think he'd made a huge mistake.

"Right." Jared nodded and stepped toward the bed, gesturing to his box. "Well, I'll just, I'll get out of your hair." He was going to go back to his motel and end up crying all over again for hours on end. It seemed to be a thing for him.

"I don't know how to do this," Jensen murmured.

"Do what?" Jared asked softly, stopping his steps. He was much closer to Jensen now and he could see the bags under his eyes. It made his stomach clench.

"Be without you. I kept thinking it would get easier." Jensen's voice broke and he stared down at the ground and took a few deep breaths. "I'm just so tired, and I miss you and some days it's just so hard to breathe." Closing his eyes Jensen lifted his hand half way to his forehead then dropped it back to his side. He hadn't cried a single tear since he'd sent Jared away and now he could feel his cheeks damp and cool and lifted his hand to drag it down his face.

"I know." Jared breathed and found himself stepping toward Jensen then freezing. "I kept thinking, that it would just, all go back. But, I know it can't. Everything's changed, these past two weeks, I just feel like I'm drowning and I wish that I could just hold you and kiss you again because I miss you so bad it hurts." The words choked in his throat and Jared stepped back again so he wouldn't pull Jensen into him.

Jensen shot forward and threw his arms around Jared's neck, pulling him in as close as he could. The smell was so familiar it made a flare of ache burst to life in his heart again and he sucked in a few deep breaths. "Stay. Please, can we just-" Sliding his hand up into Jared's hair, Jensen held on to him like he was some kind of anchor.

"God." Jared sucked in a surprised breath and tightened his arms around Jensen, holding him as close as possible. He couldn't stand not holding him anymore and this, having their bodies pressed together, was so very wonderful in his mind. "Jensen," he breathed and stumbled slightly, pulling Jensen almost up off the floor as he held him as close as possible. "Yes. We can just." He inhaled Jensen's familiar smell and closed his eyes, drinking it in.

"I'm so sorry," Jensen murmured into Jared's neck. "I didn't know. It was like-" giving up he buried his face against Jared's warmth and just tried to keep breathing. He was terrified that if he let go of Jared’s neck somehow the man would disappear again and Jensen couldn't face that.

"Don't. You don't apologize." Jared whispered and let Jensen cling to him, holding on just as much. For just a moment he could imagine the shit eating grin Christian would be sporting if he were there watching this. "It's okay. It's all okay." And Jared really prayed it was because he couldn't stand it not being that way. "I love you Jensen. Still. Always." He buried his nose in Jensen's hair, murmuring the words there.

Jensen didn't even know if he could speak, his throat was tight and dry and he slid down a little and tugged on Jared's arm until the man followed him over to the bed. "Will you stay here for a while? I - I think I need you," Jensen whispered. He could feel tears trailing slowly down his face again and lifted his fingers the brush them slowly over Jared's cheek.

"Of course. I, I'll stay as long as you let me." Jared kicked quickly out of his shoes and slid onto the bed, tugging Jensen into his arms and sliding him close, wrapping arms tight around his body and holding him. "I've got you," he whispered, not sure what else to say. He'd never seen Jensen so broken, and he didn't want to say the wrong thing, so he simply stroked his back and hair and didn't loosen his grip.

Jensen could feel the tension draining out of his body and pressed up hard against Jared's body. It was right; it was the place he belonged. No matter what he might have yelled at Christian on the phone about the man be a meddling asshole and crossing boundaries and all the other things he would owe the guy an apology for later. Christian was right. There were some things you just forgave people for and some things meant you should ask to be forgiven for.

"Jay?" Jensen pulled back a little so he could stare into those hazel eyes he'd missed so much. "You scared me but you were right," his voice was soft, quiet, and the huge, empty warehouse just shrank down to the enveloped of warmth in Jared's arms. "I did know who you were - I just, I thought it was happening all over again. I owed you better than that." Closing his eyes for a few moments he breathed slowly, fingers sliding back up into Jared's hair.

A soft smile grew across Jared's face and he shifted forward, letting their noses brush together. "I think, we were both wrong. I should have been completely honest with you. I will be from now on. Completely. I promise not to keep anything from you ever again, if you think you can give me another chance?" Jared felt the first flicker of hope crawl up in him and he held his breath around it.

"I _think_ I'm not letting you walk out that door _ever_ again." Jensen tilted his chin up and pressed his lips to Jared's softly, relief washing over him instantly. "I love you," he sighed, lips still pressing gentle kisses along Jared's lips, his face, anywhere he could reach.

Releasing a soft burst of laughter, Jared turned so he could catch Jensen's lips in a deep kiss. The warmth and taste flooded through him and Jared moaned, cupping along the back of his head to keep him there. When he pulled away, Jensen had somehow shifted on top of him and Jared grinned up at him. "I could, um, see, I've kind of been living in one of those motels were you pay for the week? It's draining my money pretty fast. But, I could stay here? If, if you thought that would be okay." Jared figured he was probably rushing things, suggesting to move in moments after they got back together but he had no real desire to leave either.

"I wasn't lying you know." Jensen looked down at him very seriously.

Eyebrows lifting, Jared grinned at him at it felt so _good_ to smile his entire body warmed. "Never gonna let me walk out the door? That could get complicated. I think I kind of have a job I've got to go to."

The smile he'd been holding back broke across Jensen's face and he let his body sink down on to Jared's. "I know the boss. I'll see if you can have tomorrow off - you know..." eyes locked with Jared's he bumped their noses together again, "so you can move in."

"Yeah?" Jared's heart flipped in his chest and he grinned, tugging Jensen in to him so their lips could crash together. He could still spend forever kissing Jensen and he was relieved that happened changed. His tongue slid almost instantly forward, hands sliding down Jensen's back. When he pulled back with a soft gasp, he stared with watery eyes up at Jensen. "I love you so very much. I want to spend the rest of my life with you okay?"

"Lemme think," Jensen teased. Lifting his thumb to Jared's cheek he swept away a tear that had fallen. "Yeah, I think I'll keep you." His heart was fluttering in his chest and Jensen was pretty sure that after he apologized to Christian he was going to have to kiss the fucker.

"Thank god." Jared laughed and pulled Jensen in, kissing him once more. They were going to need tomorrow off just so he could reacquaint himself with his lover once more. "Hey," Jared broke the kiss - again - because things kept popping up in his mind to say. "My dad, he's not so cool with this. But my mom, she's trying to keep the peace and all that but she's been really supportive. We went out to lunch last week. Anyway, you think you'd want to meet her some time?" He leaned up, pressing his lips to Jensen's jaw, sliding down and to his neck, needing to kiss him as much as possible.

"Yeah?" Jensen pulled back a little, seeking out Jared's gaze. "I'd really like that. Can I hold your hand?" Tucking Jared's hair behind his ear Jensen grinned.

"Definitely." It was so good to see Jensen's smile, Jared couldn't help mirroring it. "Have I mentioned I love you recently? 'Cause I do." He didn't care if he sounded ridiculous; he was going to be saying it a lot in the upcoming, well, probably forever.

Nodding slowly, Jensen's smile wavered. "Don't think I'm crazy, but ... could we sleep? Would you stay here? Sleep here with me? I'm so fucking tired." Sleep hadn't coming easily if at all over the days since everything had started to fall apart.

"Okay." Jared said softly and tipped Jensen slightly off his body, curling his arms tight around him. He had been kind of looking forward to make up sex but he could wait, just knowing Jensen was his again eased everything in him. He pressed a soft kiss to Jensen's head and closed his eyes. He could probably use some sleep if he were completely honest with himself.

Smiling, Jensen nestled as close as he could. "Besides," he muttered, "you still owe me breakfast in bed. I sleep. I wake up? You can be breakfast." His arms were tight around Jared, the man's breath warm on his cheek.

Chuckling, Jared grinned. "Yeah. Sounds like a good plan to me." He could definitely be breakfast and he'd be looking forward to it.

-=-=-=-

Jared bounced from foot to foot, staring at his slung low jeans and the not so bare hip in the mirror. The image was pretty perfect, Jensen had spent hours perfecting it Jared was sure, and nerves sparked along his veins at a rate too fast to be measure. "This is going to hurt a lot isn't it?" He said quietly and looked toward the door way. Christian was watching him, eyebrow arched slightly, and Jared could see beyond him across the hall to where Jensen was setting him his inks.

"Yup." Christian snorted and crossed his arms. "Like a mother fucker. He's good though, gotta watch the bastard though. Sometimes he tries to touch guys like you inappropriately during the tattoos."

"Get your ass in here Jared," Jensen called out. He was _more_ than ready to get his design on Jared's body.

Laughing, Christian stepped down the hall and peered into Jensen's room to slap his hand on the door a couple of times. "Leaving. I'll lock you two in. Be good."

Grinning, Jensen pushed his hair back with his forearm and stood. "Night Kane."

Jared supposed it was something like a requirement to have a tattoo if you worked in a tattoo shop, and well, this was kind of a _him and Jensen thing_ , a sign of his commitment level. And he trusted Jensen, with every inch of his being. There was no one else he'd rather have doing this.

Smiling nervously at Jensen, Jared stepped into the room and pushed at his jeans, kicking them off to the side and leaving himself in his boxers. "Up on the table?" He asked, already knowing, and stepped closer, sliding his hand over his boyfriend's shoulder and biting down on his lip.

"You betcha, I'm gonna trying something a bit different tonight. 'Cause I know you're nervous." Jensen grinned. _Scared shitless_ was more like it. Although, Jensen had to say there a sparkle in Jared's eyes that hadn't been there earlier.

"I'm not so sure I want to be your guinea pig for something different." Jared said quietly and slid himself up onto the table, settling back and staring at Jensen. He'd toyed back and forth with the idea of Sandy coming - she'd begged and pleaded - but in the end decided it would be just him and Jensen and that sounded best.

"You're gonna like this." Jensen leaned back on his stool and tugged his shirt off. Sliding the tray close to the table he smiled and leaned forward to curl his fingers over the waist band of Jared's boxers and slide them down over his thighs so he could pull them off. "Sit a little further up the table," he murmured. He couldn't stop looking at Jared's body, the outline of the tattoo, the way his boyfriend's eyes were glinting when he looked up at Jensen.

"Naked tattoos?" Jared whispered and slid a little further up, biting down on his lip. He watched Jensen with slightly wide eyes and heat stirred up in his body, slowly crawling along his skin despite being half naked on the table in the somewhat chilly room.

"Kinda, well, _you'll_ be naked, I'll be half naked." Jensen flashed a smile and took a deep breath then pulled his gloves on. "See. The thing about tattooing that most people don't know is that you have to pull the skin tight, so you need both hands. But, you know how my back aches so much when I'm working. I figured I would try a new position." Grinning, Jensen grabbed Jared's thighs and yanked him right to the edge of the table so his legs fell off the sides and his ass was barely on the table.

Leaning forward, Jensen pressed up against Jared's cock, settling himself between his lover's thighs and as close to him as he could. He spread the latex covered fingers of his left hand flat over Jared's hip and leaned down to kiss his hardening shaft. "Ready?"

"Oh. My god." Jared blinked down at him, eyes wide. "You can't, uh, you're gonna..." It wouldn't matter if there was any pain or not, Jared wasn't going to register anything more than Jensen between his legs, right _there_. "Do it." Jared choked out, wetting his lips uncertainly. It was the first step he was most worried about, the first initial touch of the tattoo gun.

"You're fine," Jensen soothed. Resting his cheek against his lover's cock he stretched the beautiful creamy skin by Jared's hip and buzzed the gun. "Starting now, just relax." Reaching over he dipped the needle in the small container of black ink and pressed the needle to Jared's skin for hardly a moment before starting the machine up. The dull buzz soothed Jensen's nerves almost immediately and he felt Jared's tense against him. Turning his cheek slowly he dragged his lips up his lover's cock and smiled at him. "You okay Jay?"

What Jared hadn't expected during the planning of this whole entire thing was for the pain to feel... _good_. Better than good. Sure it was odd and unexpected and might have made him hiss a little but for some insane reason Jared _liked_ it. Even if it wasn't really a good pain, it was really, fucking hot and the combination of Jensen's deep words and brushing lips on his skin had Jared pulling in shaky breaths. "Holy fuck," he whispered, eyes fluttering open and closed down at Jensen.

Carefully tracing the lines of the transfer on Jared's skin, Jensen chanced a look up at his boyfriend. "God," he murmured and quickly averted his eyes back to the tip of his needle. Rubbing his cheek gently against Jared's cock, Jensen propped himself up slightly and tattooed. _Tattooing_ his lover. Sighing, he caught his bottom lip between his teeth and worked the lines slowly.

The more Jensen continued to trace along the transfer, ink the skin, slid soft caresses over Jared's cock, the hotter it got. "Jensen," he moaned low in his throat and forced his body not to jerk forward into the wave of sensations. "That's-" Jared was panting now, the leg not being worked on lifting up to curl slightly around Jensen, sliding over his skin. "God it, it feels good. _Fucking_ hot. Jensen." His heart was flipping over and over in his chest and Jared was more painfully hard than he ever thought he would be when each wave of pleasure was tinted with pain.

"Jesus," Jensen hissed. He'd never experienced anything like it. It was even hotter than he expected because of Jared's reaction, his skin was flushed red and Jensen could smell the heat of him _so_ close. Every now and again, Jensen would slide the needle across Jared flesh and the man's cock would jolt, twitching up and Jensen would dip his head down to lap, kiss, or rub against the over-heated flesh. "You're so fuckin' hot, Jay, this is-" he sucked in a breath, " _Jesus_."

All his skill, every ounce of concentration went into his steady hand and the lines he had so lovingly drawn. The more permanent the tattoo became, the more amazing the entire situation felt and Jensen's heart was thumping so hard he actually had to focus on his breathing to hold his hand steady. "Just... just the outline today, Jay. We'll - _fuck_ \- we'll do colour later."

" _God_ Jensen," Jared nodded shakily, only half understanding what Jensen was saying at that point. Some part of him wondered if he could just come from this alone because every tiny little sensation was sparking over him. "Wish, wish you could fuck me."

Jared panted heavily and wet his lips once more, staring down at Jensen with lust blown eyes. Dropping his gaze, Jared watched Jensen's hand curled around the gun, shaping along the dark lines, fleshing them out and making them real. It tore a moan from Jared's lips as the sharp stabs moved along creamy smooth skin.

If Jensen had any intention of continuing on to the colour shading that same evening, Jared's words shot that idea _right_ out of his head. "You're killin' me Jay." Jensen pulled the needle away for a few moments and sucked in some air to get himself under control. "Just a bit more and the outline is done."

Touching the ink covered needle down on Jared's flesh again, Jensen stifled a half-moan and pressed his bare chest up against his lover's body. The hard line of Jared's cock was so _stiff_ and _hot_ against Jensen's body he was sure he was going to go insane and the few remaining lines of the tattoo seemed to take a thousand years. But - there was always Jared. He was a moaning, barely restrained mess of damp hair and glistening skin and Jensen was _sure_ there was nothing hotter in the world. He'd never been happier with his chosen career.

"Fuckin' finally," Jensen growled. Panting softly he leaned hard against Jared's body to put everything back on the rolling tray then yanked his gloves off. He'd never wanted his hands on anyone more and it was apparent from the sudden arch of Jared's body that his lover felt the same. Fumbling in his back pocket Jensen pulled out some lube and caught Jared's eye. Gaze darkening he smiled, "thought you might like it," he whispered roughly.

"Thought right." Jared panted the words, staring at Jensen with lust blown eyes that were almost impossible to see through. Jared already knew this wasn't going to be his last tattoo, not in a long shot. Pushing up slightly, Jared reached out for Jensen but missed, hand dropping hard to his side. "Next time - next tattoo - Christian's gonna do it." A slow smirk curved Jared's lips up as he reached out for Jensen once more. "You'll be otherwise occupied."

Grabbing Jared's hand, Jensen growled softly as a flare of possessiveness flooded through him. "Oh. I didn't like that," he murmured. "Don't want anyone else marking you." Eyes blazing he picked up the lube and fumbled the top open to slick up his fingers. Staring down at his lover he smiled and closed his eyes for a moment as his body shuddered with anticipation. "God... Jay..."

"Do it Jen." Jared stared hungrily up at his boyfriend, wanting him more and more with each passing second. "You don't wanna- suck my cock? While I get a tattoo?" He tried a grin but it morphed away quickly in the next second as Jensen's fingers pressed forward. His ass was hanging almost completely off the table now and Jared dug his hands down onto the surface, keeping himself rooted to the spot. "Jen, need you. Please."

Thrusting two fingers hard inside his lover Jensen pulled his other hand back to lift Jared's leg and hook it over his shoulder. Turning into Jared's flesh he kissed the inside of his knee and smiled. "You're so hot when you want it, want _me_ like this." Thrusting hard he tightened his hold on Jared's leg and leaned forward, keeping his lover's ass spread wide and open for him. "Gonna fuck you so hard," he murmured.

"Al-always want you." Jared moaned and his arms shook as he struggled to keep himself somewhat upright on the table, elbows and hands sliding over the surface. "Fuck me." Jared let his head fall back and roll slowly. It was insane that Jensen could make him feel so out of control, insane with pleasure and want and the most mind numbing things possible.

Swearing softly, Jensen pulled his fingers free and fumbled with his belt. It seemed to take forever to get his jeans undone and shove them down enough to free his cock. Stroking the rest of the lube over his aching flesh he pressed a kiss to Jared's leg once more then lined himself up to thrust forward. Sinking all the way on one hard snap of his hips was just about mind-blowing. His teeth grazed the tender flesh of Jared's leg as his other hand pressed hard just below the new tattoo and he breathed through the urge to fuck into his lover.

After the rippling pain of the tattoo from earlier, the feel of Jensen slamming into him could only be called _delicious_ , maddeningly so. Jared's hips were rocking back immediately to pull him in deep, to clench around him, lips parting on a silent gasp. There was nothing else in the world as amazing as this moment, the connection between Jensen and himself, the tattoo creation they'd just shared and the knowledge that it was only the beginning. Jared struggled to arch his body up, teeth scraping over his lips, hands sliding slick on the table beneath him. "Fuck me Jensen, _god_ I love you." It all came out in one rushed breath but Jared knew his love understood.

Pulling back Jensen slid easily out of his lover's tight ass and felt that familiar loss of heat and closeness. It only lasted a moment and then he was slamming back into Jared. _Heat_ and _rough_ and each thrust forward was hard and unforgiving.

Jensen's heart hammered out a steady rhythm as he pounded forward, fingers tightening _too_ hard on the straining muscle of Jared's leg. He couldn't tear his eyes away from his lover. Jared's eyes were blazing, his entire body rosy with the flush of endorphins and lust and _God_ he was the most gorgeous thing Jensen had ever seen.

Widening his stance, Jensen snapped his hips forward. Sliding his hand away from the new tattoo slowly, carefully, he curled his fingers around the base of his lovers cock - pulled back and stroked up at the exact moment as he slammed hard back into Jared. "God," he moaned.

"Oh _fuck_ ," Jared groaned low in his throat and his body twitched back when Jensen's cock slammed into his prostate. Once his lover realized he'd found his sweet spot, he slammed over and over into the heat, blowing Jared's mind to bits steadily. Muscles clenching around Jensen's cock, Jared panted roughly and rocked his body into each new wave of hard fucking. This was so beyond amazing, Jared was never going to last, couldn't even try.

"Jensen." Jared growled low in his throat and forced his body still, letting Jensen take him with the continuing brutal snap of hips and skin slapping together. All around them the room was filled with the sounds of pants and moans, the slap of their skin, the air thick and heavy with heat and arousal. Then Jared saw sparks across his eyes and his body arched up into Jensen's hand, come splashing burning over his abs.

Jensen felt the tight clench of his lover's ass and his knees went weak, heart flipping about in his chest. Groaning softly he slammed forward once more as Jared's body twitched and pulsed around him and gave in to his own release. Turning his face into Jared's leg Jensen bit down on the flesh and let wave after wave of release push through him. Come pulsed from his cock making Jared's ass more slick and willing and Jensen's hips slowed until he was hardly moving. Soon there was nothing left for him to do but let Jared's leg slide down off his shoulder so he could ease himself free and fall down onto Jared's body.

Panting heavily, Jared stroked a hand slowly through Jensen's hair, smiling up at the ceiling as he draped awkwardly over the table. "We should do that more often." He grinned, knowing they had more than a healthy sex life and did _that_ on a very frequent basis. "Think we'll be able to make it through you finishing the shading at some point?" Jared chuckled and curled his fingers through his lover's hair.

"I dunno," Jensen murmured against Jared's abs, "but we'll have a lot of fun trying." Humming happily he shifted back and tested his legs. Staring down at the tattoo he smiled, "stay still for a minute. Gonna take care of that."

Moving across the room clumsily, Jensen retrieved a temporary bandage and taped it over the new tattoo then picked up some paper towel to clean Jared's body. Bending, _slowly_ because he nearly fell over, he picked up Jared's boxers and pulled them up his long legs. "Think you can stand?"

Turning he looked around for his lover's jeans and found them in a pile beside his tray. "Sit up slowly, your body's gonna be all out of whack." Bending he slipped Jared's feet into his jeans and pulled them up as far as he could before letting Jared slide off the table into his arms.

"Yeah. Gonna have to massage me." Jared murmured and slowly draped himself over Jensen, nuzzling into his neck. "Love you," he breathed and grinned sleepily into Jensen's neck, loving the heat of skin against him. Of course, he loved every moment and every feeling that he had with Jensen. "You're the best person in the entire world."

Laughing softly, Jensen pulled Jared's jeans the rest of the way up and fastened them before sitting him back down. "You're all endorphin dopey." Smoothing Jared's sweaty hair back off his forehead, Jensen snagged the man's t-shirt and helped him into it. "Gotta get you home."

Kissing Jared's cheek, his jaw, his lips, Jensen sighed and made sure Jared was balanced before he stepped away to get his own shirt and turn off all his equipment and the lights. "Let's go oh Man of mine." Hauling Jared up into his arms he kissed him hard, "let's go home," he murmured.

"Mm. Our home." Jared muttered into Jensen's mouth then let him drag him toward the door. He didn't really think he was endorphin dopey. He was just, Jensen dopey, but that was just his thing and he could handle it being that way for the rest of his life. "Can we have cherries when we get home?" He breathed as his body bumped against Jensen's while they walked down the hall.

"Absolutely, I'll even feed 'em to you." Jensen grinned and tightened his hold on his lover so he could pull the door open. "Suppose you're gonna want the day off tomorrow."

"Yeah, I know the boss, he'll probably let me have it off if I agree to blow him before he goes in and bring him coffee." A bright grin pulled at Jared's lips and he reached down to pinch Jensen's ass. "Think we can make it work?"

"Do you ever run out of energy?" Jensen's grin was making his face hurt. Pushing the button on his key chain he unlocked his car and managed to get the door open so he could fold Jared down into the passenger seat. "I think we can make anything work."

"You should try it, you know, making me run out of energy." Jared laughed when Jensen slid into the driver's seat, reaching out to touch his hair. "My skin feels all tingly. It's good. I didn't think I'd like the pain like that." It made Jared want to explore a little.

Chuckling Jensen pulled the car out onto the street. "See? This is what happens. It always starts with one tattoo. The sex didn't hurt. Now you're a junkie." Grinning Jensen reached over and threaded his fingers through Jared's. "We got plenty of time."

"I won't be getting sleeves or anything, just you know, a few things." Jared grinned at his boyfriend, stroking his fingers along Jensen's. "Hey, Sandy told me she's gonna ask you to be in their wedding. Don't tell her I told you though. Mm, you're like a drug and now I can't stop what I'm saying. You should probably help me out with that."

"Soon as we get home I guarantee I can keep your mouth busy." Glancing over at Jared he winked and turned his eyes back to the road. Yeah. They had plenty of time.


End file.
